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[morphie]

On my facebook, I posted a status. I said that I have experienced a lot of beauty and that, for this, I was blessed. And this is true. But I was talking about art. And things that could be inspiration for art if I was smart enough to do anything about anything

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[morphie]

See, the thing is, I think that somewhere deep in my subconscious I think I deserve the ick I've felt for the last two years, because I made such a stupid decision. And I say to myself that I need to forgive myself. But, I can't, yet. And this is ultimately problematic. And I need to find a way through it.

[nalidoll]

The first step to "fixing" it is to stop worrying about how you got here. You made choices. Things happened. Think of it as having explored a side-road, rather than taking a wrong turn. And then pick up and take even just one step in the direction you want to go.

I know I always make things sound like they're simple, when there are a lot of little details and complications. But each one step *is* simple; complications are just a lot of little simple things happening close together. The biggest thing is to be *taking* steps.

And if you aren't sure what all steps you need, or what direction to aim for... then your first step is sitting down and thinking about that. Writing down what you want. Writing down what you have. Seeing how much distance, and which possible obstacles, lie in between those things. *Doing*. Breathing. Believing.

[morphie]

Yeah.

:sigh: