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[mortalwombat731]

As many of you know, J and I are somewhat untraditional in our coupledom.  Among other things, this means that we speak dismissively of Valentine's Day, and if we make plans at all, they're for something wildly aggressive and non-romantic, like a hockey game or a revenge tragedy or something.  Our first V-Day, I bought him a card, wrote something

Comments

[mortalwombat731]

Oh, we already have our tix for the Duchess of Malfi... have for MONTHS!!

I feel like I should do something that, like the WWF for me, represents what he most cares about, which is probably rescue/shelter animals, but definitely NOT people.

[salient73]

Oooh. The Duchess. I posted when they did it recently in Boston. It's so rarely performed, that I'm jealous you saw it. I don't know why no one has ever done a movie version of it. It's approachable, over the top, and freaky. GG (who is not an academic, just your run-of-the-mill smart/cool person) loved Duchess.

Anyway, for J, is it possible this is "his thing" and you don't need to do anything? Maybe pick a different holiday to do something on and make that "your" thing?

Not a very helpful suggestion, but just my thought.

[mortalwombat731]

We randomly saw Duchess in London, a University of London theatre program performance that ended up being free because it ended up being their rescheduled dress rehearsal, about 5 years ago, but we love the group who is doing it here--it should be GREAT!

[cliosfolly]

Cook a meal with foods that all get set on fire! It'll symbolize the flames of your burning passion! Plus, you end up with extra liquor.

[mortalwombat731]

Fire might be dangerous. We usually just get drunk and... I'll stop the story there.

[mortalwombat731]

Yes, it is super-awesome! I look forward to hanging their pictures in my hypothetical future office.

[ramblingregina]

I've been thinking about V-Day too, given that a) it's not important to me and b) there is some particular baggage associated with the holiday for us as couple. No special advice but just, yeah I get what you're saying.

[mortalwombat731]

It's not that I don't love him, obviously, or I wouldn't be worried about having NOT acknowledged it last year... or the year before. I like giving him random presents, though, so I'll find something small and silly and wrap it in the donation email or something.

[petzipellepingo]

There's always your local Animal Shelter or Rescue Group or you could do something for the Third World countries like Heifer International.

Or... really big kitties like snow leopards.

[mortalwombat731]

I'm going to do something with a rescue group, but I want it to be a specific thing, not just "I gave money" but more an "x number of cats got ____ [fixed, fed, medicated]" type thing. We already do general donations automatically every month to several groups, plus individual cash donations at checkout and at events. I want this to be different. :)