Inarticulate and ill-formed starting point

[ailbhe]

This is probably going to sound very blamey. That's because I'm talking about my mother in law (since my father in law had NO INPUT WHATSOEVER because that's why god gave us gender roles) but not because I think she was operating as the sole blamable wossname in a vacuum

Comments

[ailbhe]

He has a sister who is less competent than I or my four sisters but left home able to do laundry and cook a basic meal. She was lousy on finance though.

So although she is a lazy parent, she did make more effort for her daughter, and I'm certain that's gendered. BUT she thinks she's a feminist because she made him learn to iron his own socks and allowed him to learn to knit. AGH.

[ailbhe]

I've never read either. I've considered asking my in-laws for The Female Eunuch for Christmas. They tend to want a list, rather than going and choosing themselves.

[riarambles]

I can't help you articulate it, but I can say that what you describe sounds veeeeerrrryyy veeeerrrryyy familiar to me.

[thereyougothen]

oh gods. If Bill hadn't lived on his own from university until age 39 that's probably what our life would be like too.
his dad cooked his first meal after marriage 2 years ago when MIL broke her hip.
can't help with articulating it any better. what you wrote gave me a perfectly good impression. "good"? what am I saying?

[ailbhe]

Rob learned a lot from his male flatmate at university - how to use a laundrette, how to cook some very basic meals.

[dramasequalzero]

I know what you're saying, seemed articulate enough to me :-)

Your father-in-law is also to blame though, surely, inasmuch as he was your partner's model of how a man behaves? I mean, I get the "house is my domain" thing that some women do/did which means no one else is "allowed" to do anything, but I think the fathers of those households are complicit in that.

[drdoug]

Can someone more articulate please articulate what I'm talking about?

It's a desperate call for the only superhero who can save everyone: Second-Wave Feminism Woman!

(It is a bit depressing that this is still How Things Are rather than How They Used To Be In The Bad Old Days Before Marilyn French.)