A Biased Lolitical History of Common Portmanteaus
(with many many apologies, puns all intended)
Cameron and Osborne, sitting in Opposition,
Giggling at Gordon Brown,
Did not expect a Clameron or Cleggeron Coalition--
Neither right nor left nor wrong
Flying despite rising VAT--
And leave Camborne in the tree.
So Mandelson takes Osborne in Mandelborne
With implements aplenty, Greek history galore,
Burying memories of NuLab’s rose and thorn-
Too many kings for one sceptered shore:
Blair slashed Brown while Campbell raged
Mandelbell tolled hollow with the Dark Prince caged.
Shadows darkening the land, Brownites in contest-
Miliband brothers together may be Milicest,
But when Burnham against Balls compete
Burnballs is where hurt and comfort meet.
That David to Ed lost may have caused a thousand shocks
But comfort's with Camerband across the Dispatch Box.
Clegging over the past (and reality’s law),
When Peter completed the Machine,
He found one fatal flaw.
Traveling to catch at least one young Buller-fiend,
He found himself out of place at an Alastair’s
Where a Nick sleeps naked upstairs.
George Gideon was never a mathematical boy
Y natural log E squared simplifies to 2Y.
Yet missing one Ed is a divisive Tory ploy
Balls called in could only loudly shout: "Fie/Vae!
Merlin's not real! Chocolate coins are not money!"
And win at Osballs for the sake of the economy.
The miscalculation has made too much snow,
Britain freezes as Liberals haemmorage Blue.
Claws' return is only for Clegg and Laws to know,
And Ashdown, too, if Clashdown rumours are true.
Either way, Parliament under Bercow is magic
And loliticians' fics can defy all logic.