Mr. Monk and the Little Monks

[mr_panophobic]

....How come no one ever mentioned there'd be children, too?! I don't know how to be a father!

Comments

[kodak_princess]

Just be really nice!

[mr_panophobic]

I'll.... try? They seem well behaved. Better than I expected kids to be anyway.

[pitchur_perfect]

That's good, Cuz if you're nice, you'll be a good Papa!

You thought kids were bad?

[mr_panophobic]

Th-th-they're supposed to be messy and.... and making them is....

How old are you?

[liesforher]

I think a lot of guys feel that way here.

[mr_panophobic]

My wife and I talked about having kids a few times, but this? This-this-this isn't--no. Why are they brainwashing children for this?!

[liesforher]

[He pauses.] Really. I'm sorry.

Are your children drones, then? It shouldn't be that hard to take care of them if that's the case. Even easier if your wife is also a drone.

[mr_panophobic]

Yes, everyone here with me is a drone. It'd be fine, but they keep looking at me funny and if the house wasn't spotless I'd try to find someplace empty to stay in instead.

[temporaltantei]

[and it's killing him to say this, but he really feels rather sorry for the American...]

... Would you like some help with them?

[mr_panophobic]

Please? How do you take care of kids? At least they're not in the messiest stages, but.... they're kids!

[temporaltantei]

Which house are you in?

[mr_panophobic]

1669 Nelson Road.

[When you get there, you will notice this is the guy who walks a full loop every morning, counting his steps in intervals of ten as he goes.]

[vengeanceshota]

It can't be that hard, can it?

[mr_panophobic]

I don't know. I've never had kids before.

[vengeanceshota]

I don't think a lot of people did. Are they... real kids? Or the drones?

[mr_panophobic]

Drones, but.... they're still people! Oh my god, I don't know how to be a father! The only good thing about this is they're passed the really messy stages!

[crazyclownwoman]

Just lock em' in a closet or somthin' if they're buggin' you. That what we did.

[mr_panophobic]

Why would you do something like that?!

[crazyclownwoman]

...uh, cause they're annoying!
Besides it's not like they're real. They're just mini-drones.

[mr_panophobic]

They're kids!