some interesting facts
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. Only another fist.
Chuck Norris spends his Saturdays climbing mountains and meditating in peaceful solitude. Sundays are for oral sex, KFC and Tequila.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.
When Chuck Norris was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Chuck Norris!" Then she had sex with him. She was the third girl he had slept with.
Chuck Norris is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit.
Contrary to popular belief, Superman has two weaknesses: kryptonite, and Chuck Norris.
Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.
Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.
More Chuck Norris Facts
Chuck Norris spends his Saturdays climbing mountains and meditating in peaceful solitude. Sundays are for oral sex, KFC and Tequila.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.
When Chuck Norris was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Chuck Norris!" Then she had sex with him. She was the third girl he had slept with.
Chuck Norris is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit.
Contrary to popular belief, Superman has two weaknesses: kryptonite, and Chuck Norris.
Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.
Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.
More Chuck Norris Facts