Love: Requiem of a universal obscurity (My take :P )
by
Azmiri Sultana Mridul on Friday, November 2, 2012 at 1:36am ·
LOVE--- A complete tizzy of an emotion. It is an energy. It is something that is flabbergasting yet enthralling, imprisoning yet freeing. They say you fall in love, but really IMHO, love is what makes you rise and shine after you fall in it. And I am not talking about JUST the romantic girl and a boy woman and a man etc kinda love. I am talking about LOVE in general. Like love between friends, between a kid and his/her parents, between siblings, between besties.
Love is something that makes you strong, energizes you, consumes you, makes you feel grateful to be alive and makes you FEEL alive at the same time. It is something that doesn’t leave you limp and crippled, it is something that helps you with the power to stand up, to get back up even though you have fallen a 100 times and is all bloody and messed up.
THEN COMES THE MOST CONFUSING KIND OF LOVE THAT EVER EXISTED. THE ROMANTIC KIND!! YIKES!
Honestly I DON’T HAVE A FRIGGIN CLUE, what that kinda love is… but when I sit back, I come up with my version of the idea of an honest love… now this might be the factions of a overly emotional, frazzled, dreamy mind with no idea of the real thing or whatsoever,… but here’s my take.
The honest, the right kinda love, the kinda love that is unique for you and your partner ONLY, I call it the “Red Rose” kinda love.
It starts with two people, willing and in tandem, or in a somewhat semblance of it and which gets reinforced with time. It is equality. It is Partnership and Friendship.
It is saying “You and I… We have something, a connection, a trust, and I am willing to explore it further… but only if you are too”…
It is saying “In this we are equals, no one precedes the other and both respect each other and their choices. No contempt, no disdain, no looking down… the least one can do is stand at each other side… be partners. No Judgment”
Maybe not in loud words or in paper, or in the form of a speech. But as long as you feel it, have it inside the both of you… that’s what matters the most.
To me, the description of love is that..it makes you strong, helps you move on, make difficult, hardcore and mature choices in life, that strengthens you, that gives you the power to say goodbye and LIVE. Most importantly, it’s the love that is entirely true.
TRUE LOVE; it is the kind of love that has passion, chemistry, history, raw unbridled feelings and its appropriate execution. Not like it is shown in movies, but peek inside the lives of your grand or great grandparents…. Whether near or distant, or an old couple not even remotely related to you, but who has lived by each other’s side and had a relationships amidst everything… you’ll find the kinda love I am talking about.
It is the kind of love that has Patience, Mercy, Intimacy, the Connection where at the end of everything, somehow you JUST get your partner, and where s/he is coming from. It has Sympathy, Empathy, Respect, Adoration, Regard, Trust, Faith.
It’s FUN and FRIENDSHIP… it’s the jovial nature that resides between two people, regardless of who and what they are otherwise.
See the thing is, if you look at my words you’ll think my god what a checklist!! And it is impossible to have ALL those in one relationship.
But sit back and think… in ANY relationship, that is surviving and is beautiful… it has all of these things embedded in it. Maybe not is blazing obviousness, but it is there and you can experience it if you look close.
It’s DEVOTION...Oh the truest form of devotion! It needs not be epic or Movie or TV Drama violins and breeze and symphony epic. For it to be actual, it needs to be true….
One needs to be vulnerable at times of feeling and showing love, for if you are not truly exposed, you will never be able to truly express. Bring your walls down ONLY if that is what you want. There is a 100% possibility of you getting hurt and ending up even more lacerated than you were before, and vice versa, but it is STILL a choice… a leap you HAVE to make to see the difference.
It is cherishing your partner, literally and from the very depth, and getting cherished in return… because when you put in and invest yourself honestly, you just don’t care if you gain or lose. You just give in you 100% and bring your walls down. It is also the surety that “there will be someone HOTTER, more BEAUTIFUL, SEXIER, AND MORE EVERYTHING... but to me, you’re ALL I WILL EVER NEED”
Love like that… trust me… you don’t GET IT… it doesn’t MAGICALLY HAPPEN.
It grows… gradually. It opens up/exfoliates slowly, it needs to be built… it needs 2 people who are willing to have that. It needs INVESTMENT… two people, honestly, completely and willingly invested in each other and making an effort to have that kinda love in their relationship.
Because LOVE like that is a form of a life choice, and life choices don’t JUST happen out of the blue. Love like that happens only when the relationship is a form of Mutual Partnership.
Mutualism, a biological and sometimes a far more developed and evolved emotional and psychological relationship where there are 2 partners involved who cannot survive without the other purely because they NEED each other.
It’s like how the wheels of a car are set to function, so that the car can run as a machine in whole. It’s the relationship between the hands the eyes. If the hand hurts, the eye cries, and when the eyes cry, the hand moves up to swipe away the tears. THAT … for me is true love, and it JUST doesn’t happen, it takes will, and the determination to grow to evolve … it takes a LOT of time to grow to gradually take place between 2 people who might have started a relationship with NOTHING at all.. Not even friendship; these things might take place between 2 perfect strangers... but in time, they might have JUST those.
Sex is always about manifesting the physical pleasure between two people.
But coupling/making love is something else entirely. It is feeling things…things that aren’t tied specifically to the physical. It is becoming yin to each other’s yang in the truest sense of the words. It is consummation of a commitment. It is bodies telling each other what are too scary or too open to say out loud.
These aspects are like the ingredients of a brilliantly made dish, where each one comes either one after another or sporadically or in bouts or is sequences where introduction of each part makes the experience that much more right, that much appropriate. … But really the necessities for it to happen are simple little things like belief and the will, devotion, honesty and patience… aka LOVE
Is it possible (and not just possible, but is it okay) to love someone unconditionally? And the ironic epiphany is: It's okay to love unconditionally under one condition. They HAVE to love you back.
Doesn’t matter what kind of love, what definition of love is being dealt with.