I want to jump off a cliff...
I close my eyes and picture the life I want.
I see myself in the future, relaxed and happy, sucessful as a writer, content in my relationship with tygrr.
I face the world with a confidant smile, always knowing who I am and liking that reality.
So why does contemplating this as my future feel like I am being asked to jump off a cliff?
I read a quote today on the front of someone's diary and it made me stop and think -
"If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business, because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down." - Ray Bradbury
It made me realise just how much I am driven by my intellect these days. I am so responsible, so cautious, so .... sensible!
And I think it's depressing me.
Could that be why I am so reluctant to pursue my goals in life, because on some deeper level I think that to achieve what I want I must be serious and responsible and serious and responsible are things I really do not want to be.
I don't want to give up today to have tomorrow.
I want to live each moment, really LIVE each moment.
I want to laugh 'til it hurts.
I want to love 'til I get dizzy.
I want to FEEL life, feel it wash around me, through me and over me.
And you know, on reflection, I think perhaps that's what I have been doing wrong. I think by being serious and responsible I am actually blocking the very things that will create what I want.
After all, isn't it life itself that gives us the basis of the imagination which a writer draws upon for her craft? Only in experiencing life richly may I add richness and dimension to what I write - and joy and contentment to my life at the same time.
I think it high time I threw off my cautious cap, my sensible shoes and my responsible robe and jumped off that cliff. How can I fly if I am always 'down to earth'? How can I grow wings if I am always garbed in the attire of intellect? How can I soar if I am always holding back and being cautious?
No wonder I've been feeling depressed lately. I mean, what Dragon wouldn't be? There's a reason Dragons have wings (even if they are only Dragons in spirit). They need to fly - something they occasionally forget when they grow up.
Maybe jumping off a cliff isn't so bad after all.
It might just be fun.
Red.
I see myself in the future, relaxed and happy, sucessful as a writer, content in my relationship with tygrr.
I face the world with a confidant smile, always knowing who I am and liking that reality.
So why does contemplating this as my future feel like I am being asked to jump off a cliff?
I read a quote today on the front of someone's diary and it made me stop and think -
"If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business, because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down." - Ray Bradbury
It made me realise just how much I am driven by my intellect these days. I am so responsible, so cautious, so .... sensible!
And I think it's depressing me.
Could that be why I am so reluctant to pursue my goals in life, because on some deeper level I think that to achieve what I want I must be serious and responsible and serious and responsible are things I really do not want to be.
I don't want to give up today to have tomorrow.
I want to live each moment, really LIVE each moment.
I want to laugh 'til it hurts.
I want to love 'til I get dizzy.
I want to FEEL life, feel it wash around me, through me and over me.
And you know, on reflection, I think perhaps that's what I have been doing wrong. I think by being serious and responsible I am actually blocking the very things that will create what I want.
After all, isn't it life itself that gives us the basis of the imagination which a writer draws upon for her craft? Only in experiencing life richly may I add richness and dimension to what I write - and joy and contentment to my life at the same time.
I think it high time I threw off my cautious cap, my sensible shoes and my responsible robe and jumped off that cliff. How can I fly if I am always 'down to earth'? How can I grow wings if I am always garbed in the attire of intellect? How can I soar if I am always holding back and being cautious?
No wonder I've been feeling depressed lately. I mean, what Dragon wouldn't be? There's a reason Dragons have wings (even if they are only Dragons in spirit). They need to fly - something they occasionally forget when they grow up.
Maybe jumping off a cliff isn't so bad after all.
It might just be fun.
Red.