FIC- Someone Like You
Title: Someone like You
Pairing: Yunjae
Genre: Drama/Angst
Length: One Shot.
Summary: Song fic. "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead,"
WARNING: Character's death,
AN: Sorry for any typo or grammar error.
I heard that you're settled down,
That you found a girl and you're married now,
I heard that your dreams came true,
You found yourself staring into space in the middle of a very important meeting.
You realize, you really need to focus, as the plan of having a reunion is really important, especially, after the solo activities and even after 6 years of you living abroad. Somehow, the importance of forming and reuniting the complete cast of DBSK, the legendary boy band of South Korea just slipped from your mind.
You can’t help but musing, lost in your wild and deep thoughts, after you received and assessed the information.
You didn’t want to acknowledge it.
You simply did not want to.
Even after the nth meeting this week, the re-acquaintance, chatting, nights out and all that jazz with the other four members.
“Alright, since it’s already 9.30, we shall just end the discussion here,” his deep voice waking you up from your stupor. You look at the source of the sound.
“Yah, why are you acting like the leader all of the sudden?” Yoochun, jokingly asked. Amused by the fact that they want to conduct reunion after so long, yet Yunho already act like the leader he was.
At least in your heart and mind, Jung Yunho will always be the leader of DBSK.
“And why are you unilaterally calling off the meeting?” Junsu’s squeaky voice didn’t change at all over the time.
“Isn’t it clear?” Changmin cut Junsu, “With Ga Yoon-noona waiting and calling several times already, this obedient husband shall get going in ten minutes,”
Ah!
Yes.
You remember exactly as to why the idea of reunion is not so important anymore.
It is exactly because of her name.
The name of Jung Yunho’s lawfully wedded wife.
Yunho laughed embarrassedly, “Sorry guys, suddenly she texted and asked for me to bring jajangmyeon for her. She said she really crave for it,”
Accidentally, you flinched at the word ‘crave’ Yunho had accidentally used.
Oh yeah, how can you forgot.
Jung Ga Yoon, is also the future mother of Yunho’s children.
You studied Yunho’s happy laugh. With neatly cut black hair and dark grey shirt, he looks so matured. Can you say that he also looks more handsome than six or seven years ago?
Yunho smiled at you, “Jaejoong-shi, you don’t mind if we end the meeting here, right?”
What’s wrong with the formality?
You nod and smile a little.
With that, Jung Yunho, our husband of the year walked out of the room quickly, while texting his beloved Ga Yoon with apparent smile in his face.
“How’s life, Yunnie-ah?” had died down on your tongue,
Ever since you learn about his marriage.
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you,
***
Old friend, why are you so shy?
You gulped half the content of water bottle Changmin handed to you; you forgot just how tiring recording can be. In between, the little gulps you take, you can sense his sharp gaze on you.
“What’s wrong Changmin?” You have dropped the “Min-ah”, since he didn’t like it now. Although, you feel so sad to let go of the old nickname, but seeing Changmin’s matured look and moustache, you finally go along with his wants. Ah, how people change.
“You’re changed, Jaejoong-hyung,” he said as he looked at you, scrutinizing.
“Oh yeah, how?” you looked at him, wondering the chances that Changmin actually is a mind reader.
“Come on, tell me,” you asked again, after a minute of silence.
He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know,” he said, “I just can’t say. But you definitely look a lot more mature,”
Afterwards, Changmin mumbled a few more observations, “You have become much more reserved, hyung,”
“Really? That’s good then,” You took a gulp of water, “So, people won’t realize any of my secrets,” You smiled softly at him.
You glanced at the room. Yoochun, Yunho and Junsu is in the middle of discussing the next song they should choose, and the chance of composing their own songs.
Unknowingly, you had shifted all your attention to Yunho. How he looked so much older, so much more like a father figure and so much further than your Yunnie.
Changmin is wrong, Yunho is the one who changed at lot.
The Yunnie you know only wants children from you.
No one else.
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light,
***
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited,
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it,
One night.
You can’t have it anymore.
You just can’t keep all your emotions inside anymore. Why are you the one who should suffer all this time?
Suffer from the pain. Suffer from the insult. Suffer from the longing of seeing, touching, loving, kissing, hearing, talking, sniffing, hugging, laughing, smiling with the one you love the most.
Why must you alone?
So, that one night after having so many bottles of soju, you drive to his home.
You parked your car recklessly in front of his home and ring the bell endlessly like nobody’s business. Who cares, anyway? No one cares about you, why should you?
You just had to tell Yunho now.
Confessed to him.
“ahahaha,” somehow, you found that C word to be funny. Do you really have to go through all that experience of confessing your love to the same person again?
However, today is different.
You will see the man who had accepted your love. You will see your ex, no your lover now. Unlike many years ago, when you confessed to your best friend.
“Yes!” heavy footsteps come towards the door.
It’s his voice, slightly annoyed. You recognized the tone, even after all this time.
Now or never.
You will tell him, that you still love him, that you still miss him, that you regret leaving him like that, that you are wondering of the chance of having their love story continue, that you love him, him, him, him, and only him.
“Honey! Don’t be angry at the guest, we will have dinner together shortly, okay?”
“Yes, darling!” your Yunnie answered while laughing, “Who is i-”
You froze at the exchange of words.
And he froze after swinging the door open.
“Jaejoong-ah?”
You swallowed your saliva. Blank.
“Yunnie-ah,” you called softly, hoping to receive the usual smile or hug, like you used to receive.
But none of it came.
Yunnie-ah, don’t need you to give me a kiss or a hug here.
But, can’t you at least link your fingers with mine.
They’re freezing.
***
I had hoped you'd see my face,
And that you'd be reminded that for me it isn't over,
“Are you drunk, Jaejoong-shi?”
“No, I’m not,” you said with great difficulty.
“I think you are,”
Yunho walked back inside his house. “Yoon-ah, I will be going for a while,”
“Eh, where to?”
You don’t hear his reply; your senses simply don’t work anymore.
Until you finally feel, soft and warm hands grabbing your shoulder and guide you to a car.
Not yours, you finally realized.
“I’ll drive you home,”
“Yunnie-ah...” you finally break the silence, once the car reached your apartment.
“Stop calling me that,” he said firmly while gazing the outside.
You look at him with disbelief.
“I don’t have the right of calling you, Yunnie again?”
“You have lost it long time ago,” he snapped his reply to you.
You bit your lower lip at his hostile reply, trying not to let the loneliness and sadness overtake you, trying not to take the hollowness going deeper and wider.
“Do you know that seven years ago...”
“I don’t want to hear it,” he curtly said, cutting all of your sentences. You stories not even started and yet...
You breathe in slowly. You can feel your heart breaking slowly, even your insides breaking slowly but surely. You just confirmed your position in his heart, in his life.
“Yunni, ah, Yunho,” you try to search for the right words, none came.
“You better go to sleep, and we can forget all of this tomorrow. Now, I have to go back home right away. My wife is waiting,”
You slowly release the seat belt and open the door. Cold air hit your face right away, but your insides have shivered in coldness and loneliness for so much more than that.
“You know, it is never over. It is never over for me.”
Yunho looked at you through the open door.
“But, just like you said. You’re married now. I.. I will surely find someone else. Someone like my old Yunnie, and...” You try your best to smile at him, “I hope the best for you and Ga Yoon,”
With that you closed the door. Not long after that, Yunho’s car drive away.
Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you, too,
As you watched his car engulfed in the dark, as your heart wrenched and your insides dead, you whispered...
Don't forget me, I beg,
***
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead,"
Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead,
Your fingers work over the keyboard again. Looking for the right melody, but...
After another 30 minutes... You give up.
You take a gulp of beer and you goes back to your i-pad, trying to find the good words to write, but found nothing.
It has been three days, since Yunho had clearly stated that; officially stating their break up.
Even in those six years, he lives abroad, he never thought of losing or breaking up with Yunho.
He always thought they still have some connection left.
Even after the lawsuit, which ended in a deadlock with no clear judgment and the JYJ things, which ended several years afterwards they never officially separated.
Aren’t they supposed to still be a lover even after all those years?
Is he the only one having wishful thinking?
In the midst of tears, Yunho, sob, soju, separation, beers, anti depressant, blood and choke you still try your best to compose.
Had Yunnie forget him long time ago?
Had Yunnie forget his promise?
***
You know how the time flies,
Only yesterday was the time of our lives,
We were born and raised in a summer haze,
Bound by the surprise of our glory days,
You give up finishing your song.
You don’t know why you should finish it anyway? Why should you compose in the first place?
You look at the happy smile plastered in Yunnie’s face in the Balloons documentary video.
A soft sob escaped your lips, but you didn’t care.
You took another sedative pill, while imagining Yunnie’s smile. The pill taste salty, you don’t know it’s the pill or the endless tears.
***
Nothing compares,
No worries or cares,
Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made,
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?
What if you never went to abroad for 6 years?
What if you came back earlier?
What if you never left SM?
What if you never agree of JYJ?
What if you called more?
What if you try to meet him before?
What if you just feels fulfilled of what they have?
What if you just never met Yunho?
You stopped thinking. You stopped asking. You stopped trying to find answers as you feel so sleepy and let the darkness engulfed you entirely.
You definitely won’t feel this bitterness.
***
Yunho look at the person lying in the casket.
Pale faced and look so sad even in his last sleep.
He extends his hand slowly.
“Jae-ah,” he whispers between sobs.
***
...Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
Hey, Yunnie-ah...
You won’t leave me right?
You know? I think I can never find someone like you again, Yun.
END.
AN: Is it still unclear? I want to make a sequel. From Yunho’s POV. Is it needed or not?
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