Love as endurance part four

[msagara]

This is not actually about love as endurance, yet; it’s one of the foundations

Comments

[mizkit]

I swear to God, Michelle, your posts may not make me a better parent but it'll be my own damned fault if they don't. You continue to be insightful and wise, even if it's not what you're intending to be when you write these things. Damn, woman.

[coth]

Thank you. Your posts are helping me in a quite different context, and I am grateful to have found them about now.

[green_knight]

I don't have much to say, but I am putting it away and processing like mad, because it explains so many things. It strikes me that you've bascally employed the same strategy as with your husband: sitting down and recasting the argument until you were both sure that you _understood_ the other and communicating from a basis of 'I love you and I want to understand you and I want to make this work' and you try as much as you can to leave manipulative methods out of the discussion.

I can also see how this would have been difficult for your son- you were basically asking him to make an adult decision of 'I will go because these people rely on me.' (Which I agree is much better than "I must go because I promised/am being told to go/am being manipulated into going'). I... kind of understand why he couldn't arrive there on his own, and I can see why it was a milestone that he did... and well done for helping him to get there.

[anonymous]

Quick background on me: I wrote short stories for a few years, put creative writing aside to quit my job and go back to school, had a baby while in grad school. Baby is now 3. Your posts on family life of course make me project what it may be like with my son. He and I have similar temperaments and, I suspect, similar tempers. But there's an interesting contrast in my deeper reaction that I thought I'd share: Reading your books makes me want to read. Reading your LJ posts makes me want to write.
Thank you for all the above.