The truth is more sinister. These republican men don't sex their women, because they're too busy foot-tapping in public restrooms. So the women have to go out for sex elsewhere. When their husbands ask why they're showing and putting on clean underwear to just run to the store, they reply "Umm.. Going to Walgreens. For a pap smear." Any good republican man knows to shut the hell up when a woman mentions a pap smear. So the secret is safe.
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