Alcohol

[mt_dewer]

There have been times when I think I go through a lot of these in the same night. (especially #4 and #7... *ouch*)

ALCOHOL WARNINGS

#1. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

#2. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

#3. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.

#4. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you can dance.

#5. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

#6. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to believe you can sing.

#7. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

#8. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

#9. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your butt kicked.

#10. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary.

#11. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

#12. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

#13. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

#14. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.