Comments | mullvaney: Bridget's Fame, March week one entry

mullvaney

Bridget's Fame, March week one entry

Mar 08, 2009 09:29

Gen found the book quite by accident. She and Peter had been poking around the stalls at the Derry flea market, looking to kill a couple of hours before lunch. Peter had taken off upon spotting a table full of old planes and other woodworking equipment, leaving Gen to wander about, rooting in boxes of old table linens and glass doorknobs ( Read more... )

Comments 7

walkertxkitty March 9 2009, 17:58:55 UTC

A nice take on the subject! I like the way you developed the characters and the plot in such a short time. It's crisp, clean, and flows well.

mullvaney March 10 2009, 16:38:27 UTC

Thank you! I plan to develop this story throughout the month, so watch this space!

Good luck this week!

cedarwolfsinger March 11 2009, 22:46:47 UTC

This is such fun! I really enjoyed the way the ending was a very clear lesson but was not fatal! Good luck with this!

desert_rose March 14 2009, 15:49:02 UTC

Hi there,

Just a quick note to let you know that deadline is this Sunday at 10am EST, so 22 hours from now. Much luck to you again this week, and have a great weekend!

Edits! jamais_toujours March 30 2009, 20:31:55 UTC

Heya, I'm one of your editors for this piece :).

First of all, I love your take on the prompt. Your story is fun and grabbed my attention straight away. Even though the book and spells are clearly fiction, you've made them seem credible by mixing them in with details of Gen's ordinary life. I love the character of Mrs. Dearborn, she seems like the typical nosy neighbour and I can imagine Gen practising the spell to get rid of visitors on her. The telephone conversation gave a nice hint of tension to the piece. I really enjoyed reading it :).

I've read through the piece a few times, and can't find anything that I would change grammar-wise. If you have any questions though, let me know.

Great piece and great job :).

Re: Edits! mullvaney March 31 2009, 01:57:40 UTC

Thanks for the edit! I'm glad you like the piece;I had a lot of fun with this month's prompts. Also, it's always nice to know I didn't miss anything in the proofreading :D

kelleypen August 11 2009, 15:18:48 UTC

I love this premise . . . You have such great ideas.

By the way, when are Lucrezia and Romanus going to jump back into my beta queue?