Regarding the first one, maybe "Zur Not frisst der Teufel Fliegen"? ("At a pinch, the devil eats flies.") That's actually closer to "any port in a storm", but the only one I can think of.
Huh, I wasn't aware that saying existed in German. :) Unrelated, but I also meant to ask, because I was browsing the Internet and saw something about it and now can't recall what it was, but did the 'all blonde women are ditzy/dumb' myth ever make its way into Germany?
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Hm, probably: "(ei)'nem geschenkten Gaul schaut man nicht ins Maul" the "gift horse idiom" in German.
edited:
sorry, didn`t actually intend that reply to go to you. *oops*
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Though, really it's mostly in "good" fun. Nobody takes the trope seriously.
It doesn't help that the ditzy/dumb women often bleach their hair platin blonde, though.
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