Shadows of Self - My shadow is........Me.

[musicrocks987]

"Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
                              -- Eleanor Roosevelt
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When I walk down the street on a sunny day I see my shadow walking right along with me. It knew my past, my present, and what I would do

Comments

Primary Edits!

[attentionhoard]

Hi there! I'm going to be your primary editor for this round. Instead of going through the post with a very fine-toothed comb like some editors, which is totally helpful and awesome, I just read your entry through a few times and make note of anything that jumps out at me Everything I offer is merely a suggestion! :)

1.: This sentence has awkward word arrangements: It followed me through my childhood, and still follows me when now I am entering the scary years of high school. My suggestion: Clarify your thought by rearranging some words. Try: ... , and still follows me now as I begin the scary years of high school or something similar.

2.: The repetition of "Filled with spunk, happiness" in the second and third paragraphs should be edited.

3.: While I understand that this is acceptable as a sort of colloquial word inh our society, some people may find offense of immaturity in your writing of this sentence: "...and be a complete retard around them without .... I'd be careful. :)

4.:Another clunky sentence. "... but my friends

[ashen_roshana]

Hi, I'm your secondary editor for this entry! My comments are below, and I hope they end up being helpful to you