Porcelain Doll 2/3 ToraxShou
Title: Porcelain Doll
Chapters: 2/3
Author: mxtrxofsomer
Genre: angst, romance, AU
Band(s): Alice Nine
Pairing: Tora x Shou
Rating: R
Warnings: Weirdness (I guess)
Summary: “Bring me back that brightness for I wish to stare at the chocolate coloured mirror reflecting my past”
Notes: I’m back home! Sadly, internet’s gonna be a little hard for me this time. But I’m gonna finish all my fics cus I have time. I have new ones waiting to be written by the way but please bear with the updates a little. this 3-part fic is dedicated to my wife a_ashi as my wedding gift. I really wuv you hunny~
Chapter 1 Chapter 3
The device, softly buzzing inside his pocket was the only remaining object that kept Tora from being completely withdrawn from reality. It had been like that for an hour now, vibrating exactly ten times in every ten minutes. Tora was sure who it was, that pattern of calling belonged to only one person and he knew him very well. But Tora wasn’t about to give him the liberty of questioning him. No one and nothing was allowed to disturb the peace ha was trying to create.
Gripping the steering wheel tighter, he let the phone continue whirring against his right leg without even bothering to pick up or turn it off. He instead, focused his attention on the path before him, occasionally taking a glimpse of the mannequin-like being, quietly sitting on his left side, sleeping.
Tora preferred the window open when he was driving. He liked the feeling of the wild breeze washing over him as he thought of different things while he enjoyed the endless promises that the road held for him. It didn’t make his blood madly rush, like how it would affect the competing kings and queens of speed. He liked it simply because it reminded him of how his sleeping doll’s hair would dance in the hymn of the warm summer wind as they glided down the steepest slope of their reserved hill.
His beloved used to laugh carelessly under heaps of both gray and white clouds until he was writhing in pain from excessive happiness. Tora loved to watch this kind of scene, feasting his eyes on his addicting smiles and taking advantage of his hurt by kissing the clothed muscle just below his ribs. Tora could clearly remember the excited beating of his heart and the overwhelming heat radiating from his body whenever he did this. He at first did not understand what they had meant for they were mere results of an innocent gesture, until that time, when like a possessed creature, he suddenly had brought his lips on his plush ones, making the other sob in shock while clumsily returning his kiss.
It was then the beginning of something new between the two of them, something that had always been there, but was concealed carefully underneath the frail lace-like skin of their own blindness, in the fear of admitting denunciation. It had always lived in their hearts, sprouting in small amounts and later becoming the fuel of many hopeless desires that both of them could barely control. They had secretly shared paperweight kisses which, containing their own guilt, could scar like knives, possibly ruining the sanctity of their relationship. Tora could not be happier to learn through that confession in front of the ruins of a wooden castle that by staring at the mirror, Shou had been seeing him the way Tora had been looking at him all those times. And starting from there, for both Tora and Shou, the sun would rise earlier in the morning to set very late, until it was almost midnight. In their own self made garden, the butterflies would come and visit them more often than before, playing with the colourful flowers that were growing in the bushes, proudly displaying their tiny wings as if they were racing against the robins to become the newest breed of lovebirds.
If only the truth was as beautiful as his reminiscence, then Tora would have never wished to be inside Shou’s childish dream and not wake up anymore. But the now sleeping beauty had only left him old memories that Tora was desperately clinging to, for they were one by one, slowly fading away from his aging mind. How long would he have to chase them so they wouldn’t leave him alone, empty-handed? And more importantly, would his pursuit remain as it was?
Tora’s vibrating phone was now silent, like how the night was, when fate had befallen on them in that ancient place of memoirs. The person who had been hunting him by line had finally given up, probably realizing that four o’clock in the morning was not the best time to disturb a supposedly sleeping lawyer. The car he was driving was now leading them to the place where the dawn stretches its beautiful rays to cast jewel-like glows on the blue waters reflecting the infinite skies. That new place would be Shou’s permanent dreamland, but this time, Tora hoped to be included in it.
-----
With quivering fingers tensed from waiting, Tora brought a stab of nicotine to his lips, taking two deep drags of smoke and letting it out heedlessly despite the prohibition against smoking in public areas. Puffing his breath a little, he forced himself to relax, leaning his shoulders on the wooden rest of the bench, impatiently clicking off the fresh batch of ashes at the end of his stick.
It was yet another night of another day of another week of another month of the several years that had gone by, one more thing to add in his growing collection of evidences that proved his despised existence. It was beginning to tire him out, counting every single minute which eventually would turn into hours when in doing so, he always ended up being stuck at the same dead end. Tora even persisted to breathe, in the place of a tiny dandelion struggling for dear life, just to hold his senses close while he waited for a brink of miracle to happen, however little it was. But serenity wasn’t Tora’s best trait, and in fact it was his worst that he could already feel the sharp taste of failure at the tip of his tongue.
He had strongly believed that by sealing his destiny on that eventful night, he was saving himself from the slow death that was devouring him through time. He had thought that once he had fulfilled the cursed role that was given to him, he would be complete, finally capable of resuming his confused subsistence. But who was he to know that it wouldn’t turn out the way he was planning it to? And who was he to expect a morsel of impossibility to come down from heaven like it was for sale?
Tora’s mind was now clouding in haze from thinking too much, making his head spin in endless circles of pain. It didn’t help much that he had consumed glasses of different alcoholic drinks to drown his pitiful self in their spirits. Even for a while, he wanted to forget the dormant madness sleeping below the hollow surface of his apathetic mask. But once he was left alone, it all comes back to his old self and his forgotten secret lying elegantly in that faraway place under the constellation of melancholic stars.
“Would you like to hear a story mister?” it was a voice of a little boy that woke Tora from getting lost in his own version of mind maze. Blinking a few times, he found the kid also sitting on the bench, grinning and staring at Tora with round eyes, clutching an old ragged stuffed toy close to his chest. “For three hundred yen, I’ll tell you a story.”
Tora found himself instantly captivated in the clarity that was displayed on his huge eyes. It felt as if he was staring at the private lake in the forests owned by his beloved’s family where they used to stay for days, bathing in cold water during the day or watching the moon’s twin on its ripples during the night. For a moment, Tora felt like he was twelve years old again, quietly sitting down to listen to his grandmother’s tales while holding his other self’s hand in his. It took him enough self restraint to realize that the little boy wasn’t him nor his Shou but someone else who was offering him a short company for a reasonable amount. Tora almost died in disappointment as the artificial lights from the passing cars shone on the child’s face, accentuating his angular feature, showing Tora the obvious difference between him and his Shou.
But Instead of arguing with him or declining his offer, Tora unconsciously grabbed three pieces of coins from his pocket and handed them on his open, patient palm. The smile on the boy’s lips grew wider as he received the payment, settling himself comfortable to prepare for his own brief fiction. Tora couldn’t do anything else after but sigh, the instant it registered to him, the simple mistake that he had done.
“In a place so far away,” the boy began in a dreamy tone, squeezing his fluffy toy tighter against his stomach. “there stood an old beautiful castle in the heart of the woods. That castle, which was abandoned a century ago, was the most beautiful of all, holding within its walls a lot of treasures that no living person could even imagine. But unknown to most people at close, it also had a secret, a secret that once shared would definitely destroy everything that was kept inside it. But one day, a brave prince decided to challenge the secret, to see what the famous castle contained. But what he had found was not the one he was assuming. What he saw instead, was the body of a sleeping prince whom he had known all his life. The brave prince was very devastated upon witnessing what had become of his beloved. But before he could do something regrettable, an old witch stepped forward and offered another curse that would supposedly lift the one casted upon him. There was only one problem left, it required a great amount of time and no one would be able to tell when he would wake up. So setting forth to gather everything that was needed, the brave prince left once again, to fulfill another promise. When he came back after years, he found the sleeping prince still the same and still as beautiful as ever. But the curse that the old witch had casted finally expired and he was then free to take him away, away from everything that had been holding him captive, and away from anything that was thwarting him to continue. However, for every single curse, there was an equivalent price to pay. So in exchange for that, the brave prince had to offer his own time and now, he was the one who couldn’t move on.”
Tora was in chills as the child stopped his short speech, just before the end of the story. His heart was pounding crazily in his ears as his whole body trembled from an unexplained fear that was taking over his entirety. In his state, Tora couldn’t prevent anymore the stick of cigar from slipping off his fingers and he could only watch in silence as it fell, producing a small mess on the ground.
“Are you okay mister?” the child, with his skin turning a shade paler, asked in a choke, letting his eyes wander around in panic.
“I’m fine,” Tora quickly dismissed, forcing a few shallow breaths and swallowing hard, shoving his own nervousness down the pit of his stomach. How could it be? How could such a thing happen in just a complete coincidence?
“You have to hear the rest,” the boy insisted with a little uncertainty, frowning at him with visible worry on his naïve features.
Tora fiercely shook his head, meaning to refuse the kid’s proposition. He didn’t want to hear the remaining part of the story when he already knew what it was. He didn’t want it relayed to him when what he was wishing to avoid was the only thing it brought him. But before he could do anything else, the boy surprisingly held his cheek in his little hands, guiding him to look at depths of his brown eyes.
“The sleeping prince from the very beginning has long been dead. It was only in his family and the brave prince’s thinking that he stays alive like he was in deep sleep. But the curse has been removed for he only had one wish before he died, and that was to be with his prince before he could rest.”
-----
Endnotes: No! it’s not yet finished! I swear! there’s one more chappie. comments are love, love and love~
p.s. to my wife: I’m glad you liked the first one. I hope you enjoy the rest of the chappies too. chuus~ <3
Fan Fic Archive
Chapters: 2/3
Author: mxtrxofsomer
Genre: angst, romance, AU
Band(s): Alice Nine
Pairing: Tora x Shou
Rating: R
Warnings: Weirdness (I guess)
Summary: “Bring me back that brightness for I wish to stare at the chocolate coloured mirror reflecting my past”
Notes: I’m back home! Sadly, internet’s gonna be a little hard for me this time. But I’m gonna finish all my fics cus I have time. I have new ones waiting to be written by the way but please bear with the updates a little. this 3-part fic is dedicated to my wife a_ashi as my wedding gift. I really wuv you hunny~
Chapter 1 Chapter 3
The device, softly buzzing inside his pocket was the only remaining object that kept Tora from being completely withdrawn from reality. It had been like that for an hour now, vibrating exactly ten times in every ten minutes. Tora was sure who it was, that pattern of calling belonged to only one person and he knew him very well. But Tora wasn’t about to give him the liberty of questioning him. No one and nothing was allowed to disturb the peace ha was trying to create.
Gripping the steering wheel tighter, he let the phone continue whirring against his right leg without even bothering to pick up or turn it off. He instead, focused his attention on the path before him, occasionally taking a glimpse of the mannequin-like being, quietly sitting on his left side, sleeping.
Tora preferred the window open when he was driving. He liked the feeling of the wild breeze washing over him as he thought of different things while he enjoyed the endless promises that the road held for him. It didn’t make his blood madly rush, like how it would affect the competing kings and queens of speed. He liked it simply because it reminded him of how his sleeping doll’s hair would dance in the hymn of the warm summer wind as they glided down the steepest slope of their reserved hill.
His beloved used to laugh carelessly under heaps of both gray and white clouds until he was writhing in pain from excessive happiness. Tora loved to watch this kind of scene, feasting his eyes on his addicting smiles and taking advantage of his hurt by kissing the clothed muscle just below his ribs. Tora could clearly remember the excited beating of his heart and the overwhelming heat radiating from his body whenever he did this. He at first did not understand what they had meant for they were mere results of an innocent gesture, until that time, when like a possessed creature, he suddenly had brought his lips on his plush ones, making the other sob in shock while clumsily returning his kiss.
It was then the beginning of something new between the two of them, something that had always been there, but was concealed carefully underneath the frail lace-like skin of their own blindness, in the fear of admitting denunciation. It had always lived in their hearts, sprouting in small amounts and later becoming the fuel of many hopeless desires that both of them could barely control. They had secretly shared paperweight kisses which, containing their own guilt, could scar like knives, possibly ruining the sanctity of their relationship. Tora could not be happier to learn through that confession in front of the ruins of a wooden castle that by staring at the mirror, Shou had been seeing him the way Tora had been looking at him all those times. And starting from there, for both Tora and Shou, the sun would rise earlier in the morning to set very late, until it was almost midnight. In their own self made garden, the butterflies would come and visit them more often than before, playing with the colourful flowers that were growing in the bushes, proudly displaying their tiny wings as if they were racing against the robins to become the newest breed of lovebirds.
If only the truth was as beautiful as his reminiscence, then Tora would have never wished to be inside Shou’s childish dream and not wake up anymore. But the now sleeping beauty had only left him old memories that Tora was desperately clinging to, for they were one by one, slowly fading away from his aging mind. How long would he have to chase them so they wouldn’t leave him alone, empty-handed? And more importantly, would his pursuit remain as it was?
Tora’s vibrating phone was now silent, like how the night was, when fate had befallen on them in that ancient place of memoirs. The person who had been hunting him by line had finally given up, probably realizing that four o’clock in the morning was not the best time to disturb a supposedly sleeping lawyer. The car he was driving was now leading them to the place where the dawn stretches its beautiful rays to cast jewel-like glows on the blue waters reflecting the infinite skies. That new place would be Shou’s permanent dreamland, but this time, Tora hoped to be included in it.
-----
With quivering fingers tensed from waiting, Tora brought a stab of nicotine to his lips, taking two deep drags of smoke and letting it out heedlessly despite the prohibition against smoking in public areas. Puffing his breath a little, he forced himself to relax, leaning his shoulders on the wooden rest of the bench, impatiently clicking off the fresh batch of ashes at the end of his stick.
It was yet another night of another day of another week of another month of the several years that had gone by, one more thing to add in his growing collection of evidences that proved his despised existence. It was beginning to tire him out, counting every single minute which eventually would turn into hours when in doing so, he always ended up being stuck at the same dead end. Tora even persisted to breathe, in the place of a tiny dandelion struggling for dear life, just to hold his senses close while he waited for a brink of miracle to happen, however little it was. But serenity wasn’t Tora’s best trait, and in fact it was his worst that he could already feel the sharp taste of failure at the tip of his tongue.
He had strongly believed that by sealing his destiny on that eventful night, he was saving himself from the slow death that was devouring him through time. He had thought that once he had fulfilled the cursed role that was given to him, he would be complete, finally capable of resuming his confused subsistence. But who was he to know that it wouldn’t turn out the way he was planning it to? And who was he to expect a morsel of impossibility to come down from heaven like it was for sale?
Tora’s mind was now clouding in haze from thinking too much, making his head spin in endless circles of pain. It didn’t help much that he had consumed glasses of different alcoholic drinks to drown his pitiful self in their spirits. Even for a while, he wanted to forget the dormant madness sleeping below the hollow surface of his apathetic mask. But once he was left alone, it all comes back to his old self and his forgotten secret lying elegantly in that faraway place under the constellation of melancholic stars.
“Would you like to hear a story mister?” it was a voice of a little boy that woke Tora from getting lost in his own version of mind maze. Blinking a few times, he found the kid also sitting on the bench, grinning and staring at Tora with round eyes, clutching an old ragged stuffed toy close to his chest. “For three hundred yen, I’ll tell you a story.”
Tora found himself instantly captivated in the clarity that was displayed on his huge eyes. It felt as if he was staring at the private lake in the forests owned by his beloved’s family where they used to stay for days, bathing in cold water during the day or watching the moon’s twin on its ripples during the night. For a moment, Tora felt like he was twelve years old again, quietly sitting down to listen to his grandmother’s tales while holding his other self’s hand in his. It took him enough self restraint to realize that the little boy wasn’t him nor his Shou but someone else who was offering him a short company for a reasonable amount. Tora almost died in disappointment as the artificial lights from the passing cars shone on the child’s face, accentuating his angular feature, showing Tora the obvious difference between him and his Shou.
But Instead of arguing with him or declining his offer, Tora unconsciously grabbed three pieces of coins from his pocket and handed them on his open, patient palm. The smile on the boy’s lips grew wider as he received the payment, settling himself comfortable to prepare for his own brief fiction. Tora couldn’t do anything else after but sigh, the instant it registered to him, the simple mistake that he had done.
“In a place so far away,” the boy began in a dreamy tone, squeezing his fluffy toy tighter against his stomach. “there stood an old beautiful castle in the heart of the woods. That castle, which was abandoned a century ago, was the most beautiful of all, holding within its walls a lot of treasures that no living person could even imagine. But unknown to most people at close, it also had a secret, a secret that once shared would definitely destroy everything that was kept inside it. But one day, a brave prince decided to challenge the secret, to see what the famous castle contained. But what he had found was not the one he was assuming. What he saw instead, was the body of a sleeping prince whom he had known all his life. The brave prince was very devastated upon witnessing what had become of his beloved. But before he could do something regrettable, an old witch stepped forward and offered another curse that would supposedly lift the one casted upon him. There was only one problem left, it required a great amount of time and no one would be able to tell when he would wake up. So setting forth to gather everything that was needed, the brave prince left once again, to fulfill another promise. When he came back after years, he found the sleeping prince still the same and still as beautiful as ever. But the curse that the old witch had casted finally expired and he was then free to take him away, away from everything that had been holding him captive, and away from anything that was thwarting him to continue. However, for every single curse, there was an equivalent price to pay. So in exchange for that, the brave prince had to offer his own time and now, he was the one who couldn’t move on.”
Tora was in chills as the child stopped his short speech, just before the end of the story. His heart was pounding crazily in his ears as his whole body trembled from an unexplained fear that was taking over his entirety. In his state, Tora couldn’t prevent anymore the stick of cigar from slipping off his fingers and he could only watch in silence as it fell, producing a small mess on the ground.
“Are you okay mister?” the child, with his skin turning a shade paler, asked in a choke, letting his eyes wander around in panic.
“I’m fine,” Tora quickly dismissed, forcing a few shallow breaths and swallowing hard, shoving his own nervousness down the pit of his stomach. How could it be? How could such a thing happen in just a complete coincidence?
“You have to hear the rest,” the boy insisted with a little uncertainty, frowning at him with visible worry on his naïve features.
Tora fiercely shook his head, meaning to refuse the kid’s proposition. He didn’t want to hear the remaining part of the story when he already knew what it was. He didn’t want it relayed to him when what he was wishing to avoid was the only thing it brought him. But before he could do anything else, the boy surprisingly held his cheek in his little hands, guiding him to look at depths of his brown eyes.
“The sleeping prince from the very beginning has long been dead. It was only in his family and the brave prince’s thinking that he stays alive like he was in deep sleep. But the curse has been removed for he only had one wish before he died, and that was to be with his prince before he could rest.”
-----
Endnotes: No! it’s not yet finished! I swear! there’s one more chappie. comments are love, love and love~
p.s. to my wife: I’m glad you liked the first one. I hope you enjoy the rest of the chappies too. chuus~ <3
Fan Fic Archive