i just keep listening to this song over and over and over.

my LUNGS
are full of FEATHERS

to day i metaphorically signed the papers for another body to occupy the house. i'm sure it is for the best. or maybe it isn't.

i am balancing my checkbook on my dark head. yesterday i wore my hair in pigtails for the first time since i was nineteen years old. today i had a drink at 4:30 pm. also i had a bath and drove a friend to the bus station. i am having a mental breakdown.

there is a theme here, do you see it? i do things at night, and during the day i do not. during the day i look at the pictures in french magazines. i make coffee and let it boil black on the stove, again. i try to read that kurt vonnegut book, again. i look at my class schedule, again. it doesn't make any difference. nothing in the light of day.

i have not slept in my bed for the last two nights.

i went to a movie last night and it was terrible so i left.

i drove my friend to the bus terminal today after we giggled our way through lunch. after we giggled our way through a movie last night. after we giggled the last two months away. i miss giggling with him already.

tomorrow (today) is the shortest day of the year. but i bet it will go by so slowly.

to night i watched a film with a friend. we went to the theatre and there was no line so we were ten minutes early. so we decided to wait in a different line. a boy who looked thirteen poured a bucket of cola for my friend and i. we also shared a hot dog.
now i am going to listen to this eric's trip song and i am going to cut my bangs. snip. snip.