Comments | my_solipsism: Things

my_solipsism

Things

Jul 19, 2011 23:46

Finally talked to Thrugyar on the phone the other day. I miss him when he's not being an asshole. This wasn't one of those times. He's one of those people that can sound reasonable, logical, and absolutely to the point - and be out of his ever-loving mind while doing it ( Read more... )

Comments 6

youthculture July 20 2011, 04:17:05 UTC

that sucks. :/

i feel pretty much the same way, though. there are times when he's dragged me out of awful places and told me exactly what i've needed to hear, the good and the bad, and then there's something like this which i can't really justify or really understand given the good advice he offers to others.

i dunno. blargh blargh blargh.

my_solipsism July 21 2011, 12:22:13 UTC

Yeah, that's what makes this so frustrating - I feel like he's that old poem about the "girl with the curl in her forehead, and when she is good she is very very good, and when she is bad she is horrid". He can be what's best and worst in a person within the span of five minutes.

I miss the good parts, because they're so good, and this wouldn't bother me nearly so much if those weren't there.. I guess I just don't understand the not caring.

sistahraven July 20 2011, 17:41:57 UTC

That was pretty much what he told me when he talked to me about it. I tried to point out the lapses in his logic, but he is who he is. I admit, I feel majorly conflicted about it all.

He's got a talent for telling people what they need to hear (rather than what they want to hear), but he is so far off-base with this one that it baffles me. I have my theories, of course, but in the end, he did something shitty, and feels 100% justified in it, and that's a hard thing to balance out in my mind.

my_solipsism July 21 2011, 12:24:52 UTC

I hear ya. I don't think I can try balancing it anymore, but I know in the past I've given him a "pass" when I've seen bad things happen from afar - so I certainly can't take a high road. It just never struck this close to home, so it was always "Well, he's an asshole, he comes with a warning, so you get what you get". We've had minor skirmishes with him, but never anything like this.

So I'm a giant old hypocrite, which I guess I'm going to be okay with, because I should have cared this much and stepped back the first time I saw him burn bridges and really hurt someone just cuz he thought he was justified.

sistahraven July 22 2011, 05:09:59 UTC

I tend not to give people passes. I gauge how much my trust in that person has increased or decreased, and try my best to remain detached/neutral.

I admit, being detached with this one has been trying, to say the least; I'm protective of you, and of Wick. I also vehemently disagree with his opinion on this, as it's a topic which hits close to home for many of my friends.

I acknowledge there is an aspect of him I like and will continue to enjoy for as long as it's there, but I've taken note of his actions, and adjusted my trust level with him.

Also, I don't view it as being hypocritical. You have changed your mind, based on new information being presented; that's adaptation.

(The comment has been removed)

my_solipsism July 21 2011, 12:29:38 UTC

You hit the nail on the head here, completely. It's not about whether or not Wick's sometimes frustrating to deal with, particularly at game - he totally is, and he knows it and continues to work on it (with varying degrees of success, frankly). It's about choosing to react to someone disabled with PTSD and expect them to just "snap out of it" on a convenient timeline - that's completely unrealistic and patently unfair, and also discounts all the work and progress that's been made toward coping.