The Name of the Sue?
Ok, I keep hearing about this book The Name of the Wind, so I looked at the author's site for info on the book. Instead of a summary of the plot, there's a short first-person introduction from the main character. It's basically HI I'M A MARY SUE, WATCH ME DAZZLE!
My name is Kvothe, pronounced nearly the same as "quothe." [Oh, good lord.] Names are important as they tell you a great deal about a person. [Like that your creator is way too pleased with his own cleverness?] I've had more names than anyone has a right to. The Adem call me Maedre. Which, depending on how it's spoken, can mean The Flame, The Thunder, or The Broken Tree. [His other name is even MORE special! JFC.]
"The Flame" is obvious if you've ever seen me. I have red hair, bright. [Yes, but which jewel tone are your eyes? Turquoise? Amethyst? Topaz?] If I had been born a couple of hundred years ago I would probably have been burned as a demon. [You're making me nostalgic.] I keep it short but it's unruly. When left to its own devices, it sticks up and makes me look as if I have been set afire. [But most importantly, chicks dig it.]
"The Thunder" I attribute to a strong baritone and a great deal of stage training at an early age. [You toured with MCR?]
I've never thought of "The Broken Tree" as very significant. Although in retrospect, I suppose it could be considered at least partially prophetic. [Oh, so now you're going to be coy.]
My first mentor called me E'lir because I was clever and I knew it. My first real lover called me Dulator because she liked the sound of it. [The Dulator: boring you to death with dull sex.] I have been called Shadicar, Lightfinger, and Six-String. [Shadicar is a close relative of the party van.] I have been called Kvothe the Bloodless, Kvothe the Arcane, and Kvothe Kingkiller. I have earned those names. Bought and paid for them. [With RAINBOWS! The currency of the super special.]
But I was brought up as Kvothe. My father once told me it meant "to know." ["...how to be a twat."]
I have, of course, been called many other things. Most of them uncouth, although very few were unearned.
I have stolen princesses back from sleeping barrow kings. [Sleeping kings? Weak.] I burned down the town of Trebon. [He killed a sensei in a duel and he never said why.] I have spent the night with Felurian and left with both my sanity and my life. [Felurian is actually his kitten.] I was expelled from the University at a younger age than most people are allowed in. [Were you sorted into Sparklypoo?] I tread paths by moonlight that others fear to speak of during day. I have talked to Gods, loved women, and written songs that make the minstrels weep. [I'm a shark. Suck my dick.]
You may have heard of me. [I'm a shaaaaaaaaaark!!]
Has anyone actually read this book? Is it any good? Is "Kvothe" really the obnoxious Mary Sue he seems like in this intro?
My name is Kvothe, pronounced nearly the same as "quothe." [Oh, good lord.] Names are important as they tell you a great deal about a person. [Like that your creator is way too pleased with his own cleverness?] I've had more names than anyone has a right to. The Adem call me Maedre. Which, depending on how it's spoken, can mean The Flame, The Thunder, or The Broken Tree. [His other name is even MORE special! JFC.]
"The Flame" is obvious if you've ever seen me. I have red hair, bright. [Yes, but which jewel tone are your eyes? Turquoise? Amethyst? Topaz?] If I had been born a couple of hundred years ago I would probably have been burned as a demon. [You're making me nostalgic.] I keep it short but it's unruly. When left to its own devices, it sticks up and makes me look as if I have been set afire. [But most importantly, chicks dig it.]
"The Thunder" I attribute to a strong baritone and a great deal of stage training at an early age. [You toured with MCR?]
I've never thought of "The Broken Tree" as very significant. Although in retrospect, I suppose it could be considered at least partially prophetic. [Oh, so now you're going to be coy.]
My first mentor called me E'lir because I was clever and I knew it. My first real lover called me Dulator because she liked the sound of it. [The Dulator: boring you to death with dull sex.] I have been called Shadicar, Lightfinger, and Six-String. [Shadicar is a close relative of the party van.] I have been called Kvothe the Bloodless, Kvothe the Arcane, and Kvothe Kingkiller. I have earned those names. Bought and paid for them. [With RAINBOWS! The currency of the super special.]
But I was brought up as Kvothe. My father once told me it meant "to know." ["...how to be a twat."]
I have, of course, been called many other things. Most of them uncouth, although very few were unearned.
I have stolen princesses back from sleeping barrow kings. [Sleeping kings? Weak.] I burned down the town of Trebon. [He killed a sensei in a duel and he never said why.] I have spent the night with Felurian and left with both my sanity and my life. [Felurian is actually his kitten.] I was expelled from the University at a younger age than most people are allowed in. [Were you sorted into Sparklypoo?] I tread paths by moonlight that others fear to speak of during day. I have talked to Gods, loved women, and written songs that make the minstrels weep. [I'm a shark. Suck my dick.]
You may have heard of me. [I'm a shaaaaaaaaaark!!]
Has anyone actually read this book? Is it any good? Is "Kvothe" really the obnoxious Mary Sue he seems like in this intro?