Drabble advice?

[myladylyssa]

I have just written my first F/S, and it is a drabble. Problem is I have two versions of it, and I can't decide which I like better. And now I am so close to it, I can't see the forest for the trees

Comments

[grapeofdeath]

Post both!

[myladylyssa]

Very tempting option. Each has a slightly different flavor, although they convey the same plot.

[cassiopeia3019]

Perhaps you should leave them both alone for a few days, then read them again. You might find it easier to pick the drabble you like better then.

[myladylyssa]

*tries to remember patience is a virtue* :)

[rabidsamfan]

Which one has the stronger end line?

If that doesn't help, post both under a friendslock and take a poll. Just be prepared for a discussion!

[myladylyssa]

I am not sure on this, as each shifts the focus a bit. I am kind of attached to the first one but am overanalyzing the grammatical/verb structure--it is poetic, but is it clear enough? Is it strong to end with a helping verb?

[slipperieslope]

Sleep on it.

[myladylyssa]

Getting right on that! :)

[melanieathene]

Sleep on it. Then send them both to me. :)

[myladylyssa]

Sounds good, Drabble Queen. :) Where can I send it? I don't have an email address for you. :)

[melanieathene]

wombat@kyber.biz (sorry, I forgot to include that bit in my message)