R.I.P. Billy

[mysterylover17]

Wow, I just...I don't even know what to say, or how to react. My thoughts are jumbled, a running mess of crap mostly. I've come out of my depression, as I've stated earlier, and I called my friend Billy to tell him I've finally done it. I leveled out, like he said I would. He always said if he could become stable, it was possible for anyone. So I

Comments

[wirral_bagpuss]

Oh Jesus i am so so very sorry. That is very sad news indeed. I have been in your shoes with regards to this. A work colleague killed herself oh about 3/4 years ago and i felt terrible. She had been bullied by other people. Had i known i would have stepped in and helped her both as a friend and offically as well at work. I still think of her today. She was about my age, maybe a bit older when she died. Such a shock and i wish i could have helped more. But she hid her pain and very few people knew what was happening/
So i do understand. Sending you lots of hugs and please please please feel free to PM me if you need to talk. I will always listen and be here. :)

[mysterylover17]

Thanks so much for your kindness and I'm so sorry to hear about your colleague. *hugs* It's odd, to me anyway, how, as humans, we can be so kind and yet so cruel. That's something I will never understand.

[med_cat]

I'm so sorry to hear about this...*hugs*

As to how...well, one can hide it well, you know? And then, in an unguarded moment, the thought comes...and sometimes, I think, it is very difficult to make oneself step back from the brink...well.

If you ever need to talk, you know where to find me.

Hugs,
Cat

[mysterylover17]

Cat,
Thank you for your kindness. I suppose he did hide it well. He hid it so well I never even suspected anything was wrong. I think that's what I feel so bad about, he was there for me all the time, and I couldn't even realize when he needed someone. But you're right, he probably just wanted to hide it. I should know about hiding, I do it on a regular basis. But even still, it's just...wow.

[willowtreedance]

I seriously don't know what to say, but I am so terribly sorry for you and for him (and his loved ones). The thing is... you can't beat bipolar. I guess...out the blue his mood took a great big drop. It's something to away's be aware of. The longer someone may appear to fly high, the harder they can fall. I'm so sorry he fell. He sounded like a lovely person, and I'm sorry for your loss. *gentle hug*

[mysterylover17]

Thank you so much for your kind words. *hug* I know it's silly to even think Bipolar is beatable, all of us suffering from it are living proof of that. But Billy was so believable, so enthusiastic about life that I had this childish belief that beating it was possible, you know? It's stupid, but he just made you feel like it, like anything really, was possible if you believed you could do it. He really was a lovely person and I'm going to miss him terribly.