Life is a gorgeous, broken gift.

[naamah_darling]

I lost a very, very old friend over the weekend.  The illness was sudden, acute, and ultimately fatal.  In less than a week, she was gone.

We weren't so close that her material absence will affect me on a daily basis.  I didn't see her often.  But I respected her, and she had an effect on who I am today. Without her I would be a slightly different

Comments

[ashbet]

I am so, so sorry for the loss of your friend, sweetheart :(

It's hard to lose someone young and unexpectedly, especially :/

Sending you love and sympathy <3

With everything, though -- it's good to hear you say that you're glad to be here, in life, with joys that aren't outweighed by the hard and broken parts.

*tight hugs*

<3<3<3

[naamah_darling]

She was only . . . 55? 56? Somewhere in there. Young, still. I mean, from 40? That's CRAZY young.

I have a LOT of regrets and a lot of failure to live down, and it's shit like this that make me afraid I won't outlive them. I need another 25 years at least. :/

I am glad to be here, though, even with a leaky washing machine and a car that needs to go into the shop. Here is still a good place to be. <3

[dark_phoenix54]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[ladybugpurple]

*tight hugs to you* <3

[songblaze]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Arg, those words feel so useless. I'm sorry that you are grieving, and I'm sorry that your friend is dead, and man it's hell when they go long before you expected them to.

Thank you for becoming an organ donor. I have an aunt just a bit older than your friend (she's 60) who is on the kidney transplant list. As I understand it, she's got about a 1 in 3 chance of getting the kidney she needs before her illness kills her. We're trying to stay hopeful, but the longer she goes on, the harder it is to keep faith that the kidney she needs will come to her.

[naamah_darling]

If we instituted an opt-out system instead of opt-in, it would solve a lot of problems. So would more education and outreach. A lot of eligible people think they aren't eligible because of age or unrelated medical issues. There are a lot of misconceptions about it that place barriers to the process in the way of people who might otherwise be willing.

I really really hope she gets that kidney. *hugs*

[songblaze]

Yes, I think an opt-out system would make SO much more sense.

I'm listed as a donor and have been ever since I first got my license. My medical issues as they stand now mean that they couldn't take anything from me, except to possibly use my body for research, and even then I'm not totally sure because I'm on some of the meds that they go "OMG bring containers back to pharmacy for destruction" on the label, because apparently they're super toxic. But I figure that the worst case scenario is that my body would spend a little while longer on life support before they unplugged me, and best case scenario is that I'm wrong and they'll save half a dozen lives. I'm okay with those possibilities.

[songblaze]

Also, thank you. She...it's been really hard. The average lifespan for a person in renal failure is 5-7 years, and I believe she'll be at 5 years this fall. Losing my (unrelated, other side of the family) cousin a year and a half ago (which was probably an overdose, unknown whether it was intentional or accidental) made the possibility of losing my aunt a lot more...real. Which feels stupid to say, since I lost a much-loved aunt at age 40, but it's been 15 years so I guess it is sufficiently far back in the past that it's not as...I don't know how to describe it. present? possible?...that we will lose my aunt in renal failure at some point in future if she doesn't get a kidney.

Now, mind you, some people live two decades on dialysis, so even knowing what the averages are, there's the possibility that even without a new kidney she'll be around for a long time. This is the second conversation in the past couple days about organ donation, and I'd forgotten how long my aunt has been on dialysis, how close to the average she's