What comes around, goes around
I wasn't entirely sure if I was going to comment on this considering I've tried to let it go but I have to make a few comments.
First of all... What comes around, goes around. When I quit the subbing group that I belonged to, the (now former) leader of the group didn't step up to support my decision to leave the group. YES, I was angry at two people at the time but you know what... it didn't have to turn so ugly if that person only stepped up and said something to the effect, "you know what Mika... take a break from the group. Don't worry what those two have said because it's not worth it. Come back when you're ready and that'll be that." But nope, when I quit the guy freaked out and ended up bashing me and stalking me for a while. *HE* destroyed the friendship we had.
After I left the group, very few people still talked to me. The more time that passed, no one from that group continued to talk to me. That's okay though because they never really were my friends, just people I met online and had stuff in common with them but still it did hurt my feelings that they would believe all the lies being spread by that one person I thought was a friend, albeit an online friend. NOW that he has quit the group he's now experiencing a backlash from those he considered his friends - people with whom he had spent something like five years with. Hopefully HE won't experience the hell that he gave me when I quit.
Secondly, I do forgive that person (he has since apologized to me) however I don't forget. I can't forget how miserable he made me feel after I quit the group. I can't forget the lies being told about me. I can't forget the fact that the same person who got me hooked on Sentai and Kamen Rider could end up being the same person who has made me turn my back on those two series. It hurts when you have an online reputation and that's damaged to the point where other people hate you for the lies told out of anger. His lies about me turned people against me and that's fine but still, everything he said to hurt me and my reputation was done because I quit the group and only because he was mad that I quit. I've spent almost TWO YEARS with a damaged reputation due to his lies. People actually believed him when he said I was stealing their work and giving it to the enemy. Yes, I went to "work" with another group to get my project done but at no time did I give that group ANY of the scripts or work that I did.
I stopped fansubbing because of him. I couldn't time or typeset to save my life right now. Not any more. I couldn't even tell you how I did the effects because it's been so long since I've done any of that stuff.
But the one GOOD thing that came out of it... no make that THREE FOUR good things... have been:
1) I think for myself. I will NEVER allow anyone to tell me something about another person and judge that person by what I've been told. I did that for a long time while friends with him.
2) I found a fun place to post and hang out... Ok granted, there are three other sites I visit on a daily basis and post.
3) I found another online hobby that I enjoy on a daily basis WITH my husband. I get to stab, shoot and blow up the hubby on a daily basis or kick his ass in driving. THAT actually leads me to #4....
4) I found a (gaming) clan with people that I'm actually friends with in real life. Plus there is my newer clan that I'm with that competes so I get to test my gaming skills against other people.
I do forgive that person for his hurtful actions and words but again I can't forget. Right now he's experiencing a taste of his own medicine with our former group and that's a shame because it DOES hurt when people you thought were friends turn their backs on you one-by-one. What ever is going on between him and the group IS between them and I hope that no one else decides to use it to hurt anyone else in the process. It maybe the internet but there are people behind the posts... people with feelings that get hurt.
All I can say is this to him. I wish you the best in all you do. You are forgiven for hurting me but know this... your posts, your actions towards me (and others) have had serious repercussions that echo to this day. You might find people forgiving for your hurtful and hateful actions against them BUT people don't forget. What's more, people rather believe a lie then the truth. So all those hurtful and hateful things you've said and done in the past WILL most likely come back to haunt you but that is something you brought on yourself. You will find how hurtful it is when your "friends" don't come to your defense. This will be a time you find out who your real friends are and who will use this opportunity to hurt you even more. Good luck again with your school and career since those are good opportunities to have in life.
First of all... What comes around, goes around. When I quit the subbing group that I belonged to, the (now former) leader of the group didn't step up to support my decision to leave the group. YES, I was angry at two people at the time but you know what... it didn't have to turn so ugly if that person only stepped up and said something to the effect, "you know what Mika... take a break from the group. Don't worry what those two have said because it's not worth it. Come back when you're ready and that'll be that." But nope, when I quit the guy freaked out and ended up bashing me and stalking me for a while. *HE* destroyed the friendship we had.
After I left the group, very few people still talked to me. The more time that passed, no one from that group continued to talk to me. That's okay though because they never really were my friends, just people I met online and had stuff in common with them but still it did hurt my feelings that they would believe all the lies being spread by that one person I thought was a friend, albeit an online friend. NOW that he has quit the group he's now experiencing a backlash from those he considered his friends - people with whom he had spent something like five years with. Hopefully HE won't experience the hell that he gave me when I quit.
Secondly, I do forgive that person (he has since apologized to me) however I don't forget. I can't forget how miserable he made me feel after I quit the group. I can't forget the lies being told about me. I can't forget the fact that the same person who got me hooked on Sentai and Kamen Rider could end up being the same person who has made me turn my back on those two series. It hurts when you have an online reputation and that's damaged to the point where other people hate you for the lies told out of anger. His lies about me turned people against me and that's fine but still, everything he said to hurt me and my reputation was done because I quit the group and only because he was mad that I quit. I've spent almost TWO YEARS with a damaged reputation due to his lies. People actually believed him when he said I was stealing their work and giving it to the enemy. Yes, I went to "work" with another group to get my project done but at no time did I give that group ANY of the scripts or work that I did.
I stopped fansubbing because of him. I couldn't time or typeset to save my life right now. Not any more. I couldn't even tell you how I did the effects because it's been so long since I've done any of that stuff.
But the one GOOD thing that came out of it... no make that THREE FOUR good things... have been:
1) I think for myself. I will NEVER allow anyone to tell me something about another person and judge that person by what I've been told. I did that for a long time while friends with him.
2) I found a fun place to post and hang out... Ok granted, there are three other sites I visit on a daily basis and post.
3) I found another online hobby that I enjoy on a daily basis WITH my husband. I get to stab, shoot and blow up the hubby on a daily basis or kick his ass in driving. THAT actually leads me to #4....
4) I found a (gaming) clan with people that I'm actually friends with in real life. Plus there is my newer clan that I'm with that competes so I get to test my gaming skills against other people.
I do forgive that person for his hurtful actions and words but again I can't forget. Right now he's experiencing a taste of his own medicine with our former group and that's a shame because it DOES hurt when people you thought were friends turn their backs on you one-by-one. What ever is going on between him and the group IS between them and I hope that no one else decides to use it to hurt anyone else in the process. It maybe the internet but there are people behind the posts... people with feelings that get hurt.
All I can say is this to him. I wish you the best in all you do. You are forgiven for hurting me but know this... your posts, your actions towards me (and others) have had serious repercussions that echo to this day. You might find people forgiving for your hurtful and hateful actions against them BUT people don't forget. What's more, people rather believe a lie then the truth. So all those hurtful and hateful things you've said and done in the past WILL most likely come back to haunt you but that is something you brought on yourself. You will find how hurtful it is when your "friends" don't come to your defense. This will be a time you find out who your real friends are and who will use this opportunity to hurt you even more. Good luck again with your school and career since those are good opportunities to have in life.