Fic: Back, and Back, and Back a Little More (Future Optional) (3/7)
Title: Back, and Back, and Back a Little More (Future Optional) (3/7)
Author: nancybrown
Prompt: Back to the Future
Characters: Ianto, Jack, Jenny, Madame Vastra, Strax, Parker, Martha, Gwen
Rating: R
Warnings: violence, character death, mention of sexual assault, prostitution, language, and severe bending of time travel plausibility even taking all three canons into account
Spoilers: through TW: "Exit Wounds" and through DW: "The Snowmen"
Words: 32,500 (5,300 this part)
Beta: tymewyse and fide_et_spe both had a hand in making this far more comprehensible than it would have been. All remaining aspects of wtfery are mine alone.
Summary: Accidentally shot into the past by a time-travelling car, Ianto has to fix his own mistakes or he won't have a future to go back to.
AN: Written for reel_torchwood Screening 6. Also fills the Trope Bingo space: au:fusion
Disclaimer: BBC, Universal, RTD, Steven Moffat, and Robert Zemeckis own these characters and situations, and want nothing to do with this ridiculous fluff piece of faux-Victoriana.
Chapter One
Chapter Two
***
Chapter Three
***
Jack had acquired tea for Ianto, and something golden in a bottle for himself. Not for the first time, Ianto recalled that although he performed many little tasks for Jack, Jack had always been perfectly capable of doing them for himself. He no doubt found Ianto's role as batman/butler more a novelty than a necessity. Around this time in his thought process, Ianto would remind himself how little Jack really needed him, and how the sane thing for both of them would be to end their affair before they started pretending otherwise. That usually was directly followed by seeing Jack, and feeling that uncomfortable mixed rush of emotions, and sanity could push off, thank you.
He drank his tea, and thought about time.
"If your friend Jenny was supposed to be rescued from her attackers by the Silurian, then maybe she developed a knight in shining armour complex."
"But I got in the way."
"Which would explain why she was making eyes at you instead."
To be quite fair, he didn't mind at all. Women had never singled him out as particularly good-looking. Lisa had been a rare and welcome exception, frank in her admiration both for his looks and his mind. It felt nice to be the receiving end of the attention, which had been a large factor in his choice to shag the man sitting across from him. Jack's continued interest and unashamed admiration had performed wonders with Ianto's self-confidence. As much as he enjoyed the thought of Jenny being attracted to him now, he'd found the person who fit his own damage best, and he knew her heart was far better suited to another.
He wondered if he'd ever have the chance to thank his Jack for teaching him this lesson by example.
"If she doesn't fall in love with the lizard queen, Torchwood won't approve the charter for the London branch."
"Silurian. Who's Torchwood?" Jack's eyes were innocent.
Ianto looked away, staring into his tea instead of at Jack. Oh, they're the organisation who'll capture and torture you to death until they get bored, then they'll make you an offer you can't refuse. From their inestimable ranks, you'll make loads of friends and take dozens of lovers, all of whom will die miserably. You'll wind up in charge after everyone else is dead, a king sitting on a throne of bones. I'm so sorry.
"It's the company I work for." Ianto pulled out his mobile again. "Owen told me that if it wasn't for Torchwood, he'd have been dead within six months after his fiancée was killed." Toshiko wouldn't have been better off, probably dying in a UNIT cell. Ianto would never have met Lisa, never met Jack. He'd be alive, but still unsure of himself and his life. Eight hundred people, including Adeola and Lisa, wouldn't have been murdered by Daleks and Cybermen. Owen and Tosh were still dead, too. Torchwood hadn't saved them, only delayed the inevitable.
"Without the pair of them, your history unravels. This is bad."
"Easily solved, though. I'll just explain to Jenny she needs to meet the lizard queen, introduce them, and time should be sorted out again." Guilt reminded him of their fate, but what could he do?
"Not so fast," said Jack. "You'll wind up making things worse if you just tell her."
"I don't see how. She seems intelligent. She knows about time travel."
"So do you. Think about your sweetheart back home for a minute."
Ianto took a long look at Jack and hoped his face didn't give everything away. "All right."
"Now picture Jacob von Hogflume walking up to you."
"Who?"
Jack opened his mouth to explain, then said, "Never mind. Someone you don't know walks up to you as you were ten years ago to explain that whatever your plans might be, it's your destiny to fall in love with this person you haven't even met. Here's their picture, oh and by the by, if you don't, the world will end. Think about what that would do to you."
"But Jenny was supposed to meet her last night. She's obviously at the right moment."
"And if that imaginary time traveller had told you the night before you met your current flame the same thing, what would you have done?"
He didn't have to consider. "I wouldn't have believed them. I'd still have done everything exactly the same."
Jack smiled at him knowingly. "No, you wouldn't. Armed with the knowledge, you'd either give up on the person you were already seeing and accept your destiny, or you'd run as fast and as hard as you could away from it. Both choices would be a disaster for you and your lover. If you chose to be with them, you'd never know if you stayed for love or because you were scared, and if you left, you'd destroy your own future."
"Third option. I'm my own time traveller, and I play Christmas Yet To Come for myself, and make sure young me knows he's going to break my heart."
Jack rolled his eyes. "And that's how I know you're not a Time Agent. Free advice: pretend you don't know anything about your future, and maybe it'll still be there when you get home."
"Says the man wallowing in future knowledge." Not that Jack shared. Not that he knew or told them anything useful, not until it was far too late and all the bodies that could be found were buried.
"I'm a trained expert. You're a monkey with a Gatling gun. I use what I know when there's no other way. You can't tell Jenny. If she's supposed to fall in love with this Silurian woman, she has to do it on her own terms."
Jack was right, the annoying prick. In no future did the fantasy end well of walking up to Jenny and explaining to her that she needed to start shagging a lizard woman. "Then how on Earth do I fix this?"
Jack's face scrunched in thought, then smoothed out in delight. "I have the perfect plan!"
"Does it involve inviting them both into your bed for a fling and hoping they'll fall for each other mid-shag?"
Jack paused, and said without any credibility, " ….no?"
Ianto resisted the urge to sigh. "Not every problem can be solved by the quick application of your penis."
"Hey, there's nothing 'quick' about my penis, thank you."
He let this pass before it turned into a pass. "You're in London because of rumours. Did you have any leads on the lizard queen?"
"Silurian," Jack enunciated slowly. Ianto bit back a snappish reply. Jack wasn't all human himself. He might shoot aliens when required, but he considered it basic courtesy to pronounce their names properly, and to ask for their numbers in the morning. "As far as I can tell, she's been spotted in the same area of the city as Jenny and Strax, but she's rarely spotted. She covers her tracks well."
"Then we need to attract her attention."
Jack put his hand up between them. "There is no 'we' here. I'll get the time machine up and running. You figure out how to play matchmaker."
"You said there was no hope on the time machine."
Jack stretched back in his three-legged stool. From what was surely too small a pocket, he produced a much-folded pamphlet. Ianto recognised the clip art cover to "A brief history of alien invasions in London, 1875-1900." He grabbed for it, but Jack was faster.
"You shouldn't have that."
He was met with a familiar grin that showed a bit too much teeth. Jack might have a matinee-idol smile, but so did the animatronic star of Jaws. He said, "I'm looking for signs of the Doctor. I had to know if he was coming to visit."
"I told you...."
Jack interrupted. "While I was peeking, I noticed there's good news. The Lysans are going to invade in a week."
"This is good news?"
"Their weapons discharge with a particular power cell that I may be able to rig the car to use. Get your speed up to 88 KPH at the moment you're shot by a Lysan cruiser, and you go back to the future."
"In the middle of an alien invasion."
Jack scoffed. "Hardly an invasion. Lysans are allergic to Earth's oceans. I'll spray them with a little enchantment from under the sea, they'll go home before tea."
This time, Ianto did grab the pamphlet. "You can't read through the future to find out things like that."
"I didn't," said Jack, annoyed. He tried to snatch the crumpling paper back. "I dated a Lysan guy once. That's how I know about the ocean thing. Now I'm using my advance knowledge of the future to get your pathetic arse home."
They glared at each other across the rickety work bench. Ianto dropped his eyes first. "Sorry."
"She'll need help," Jack said.
"Who?"
"The Silurian." He'd switched subjects as if the argument had never happened. Forgiveness had always been one of Jack's virtues. That, or as Ianto had often suspected, despite possessing the relative lifespan of a giant tortoise, Jack also possessed the relative memory of a goldfish. "You said she had scales, so she's not impersonating a human. She'll need human helpers, servants. People to fetch and buy and do for her."
"Right. She can't just walk into Marks & Spencer."
"Into what?"
"Never mind. Go on."
"That's all I've got. She'll have human agents working for her, which means she'll have money to pay them. Find the money, find the servants, find the Silurian."
Ianto shuddered again at the mental image of Yvonne's wall. He'd seen her face.
***
Strax was out on a house call when she got back with the money. Jenny opened the safe they'd acquired from that last empty house, counting out what they had. Last night's job hadn't been worth the aggravation, although meeting her new friend was a nice perquisite, and he'd paid up more than enough for Strax's work. Little bonuses were everywhere, if you knew how to look. Filching extra from his friend wasn't nearly as good an investment as finding another contact who knew the Doctor.
Done with her counting, she took what she'd need for today's meals and stowed the rest. Given enough time, they'd set up a proper clinic with a doctor instead of a midnight surgery and constantly having to pay off the local constable on their beat.
She heard Strax stomping up the stairs. "You're back. Did he pay you?"
"With interest. His friend's an interesting one. A Captain." She didn't know why she blushed when she said the word, and aimed for pretending she hadn't.
"A proud seaman, is he?"
She parsed his words twice before she was certain of his meaning. "More of a pirate, I'd say. Be worth something to keep an eye on that one. We got anyone near there who owes us a favour?" And if they didn't, she'd make a point of keeping an eye on them herself.
***
Just as with finding Jack, a few inquiries went a long way. He dared not ask Jenny's aid yet, though that would have made the search much easier. Within a day, Ianto had identified a man named Parker as a likely candidate for the Silurian's human agent. His employer's name wasn't well-known, although her veiled face was. Ianto caught up with him at another dark pub, buying the man drinks with money borrowed from Jack.
"My lady doesn't like having her name around," he said between gulps of whisky. Whatever he'd seen earlier today, Parker was more than happy to dissolve the memory. Ianto'd found him seeking out the company of certain women of ill-repute. Whisky wasn't his only personal Retcon pill.
"I understand. Discretion is a virtue." Ianto nodded to the landlord, and put out more coins with an indication to keep the drink flowing. "I'd heard that your mistress might be looking for servants."
"Where would you be hearing that?" His question was sharper than Ianto had expected. He'd thought the man more drunk.
Carefully, he shrugged. "Around. They say she doesn't walk around in daylight on her own. You do for her."
"That I do."
"I'm in from Cardiff, you see. We have a peculiar, even extraordinary connexion to other worlds. It's called the Rift." He spoke quietly. "I've met travellers from other planets orbiting other suns."
Parker's eyes went wide. "What's in this glass?" he asked, pushing it aside. "I've never heard such madness." He went to stand. Ianto held up a hand, nudging him back into his stool.
"I've worked for masters and mistresses who weren't quite human, but they were humane, if you understand me. It's hard on a body who looks like a demon to do the work of an angel. I've been in service for years. I'd prefer offering my service to someone who needs me."
Parker watched him. He took a long drink of his whisky, and he didn't object to the top off. After a while, he said, "Madame Vastra has many enemies. Terrible and wicked folk, who stalk the streets and hurt the innocent. She stands up for them. Rescues them. She's a good woman, the best."
Ianto nodded eagerly. "Precisely the kind of person I want to meet."
Parker had a blade suddenly in his hand and against Ianto's neck, assaulting Ianto's nose with the strong scent of his soap. "So when some blighter comes asking questions about her, I get concerned. How do I know you're trustworthy?"
"Ianto!" bellowed a voice from the entrance to the pub. Strax marched in, a wide grin on his potato face. "I thought I'd find you here. Did you find your friend?"
"Yes, thank you," Ianto said. Thank God he'd been able to find Strax's practise when Jenny was out, and had arranged to meet him. The shock and admiration on Parker's face was well worth the risk. "I was just explaining to Mr. Parker here that I have been among non-humans before."
"Indeed," said Strax. "And better for the experience." He turned, his whole body going with him. "Ah, and there's Miss Jenny. As soon as I told her I was meeting you, she insisted on joining me."
"But you didn't arrive together," said Parker, as Jenny joined them at the bar completely at home. She'd done something with her hair, making pretty ringlets around her face, and she wore a hint of rouge.
"Fancy meeting you here," she said breathlessly to Ianto. He smiled back, and stood to offer her his seat.
"Nah, I'll sit here," she said, plopping herself on another stool. "New friend?" She stuck out her hand as Ianto tried to introduce Parker.
"Actually," he said, hitting on a grand idea. "Mr. Parker, perhaps you could introduce us all to Madame Vastra right now?" Two birds, one stone. It'd be perfect.
Parker didn't like the idea, face clouding as he took in Strax and Jenny. "I'm sorry, I've said too much as it is."
"Perhaps another time," Ianto said, hoping he didn't sound desperate.
"Perhaps." Parker made his farewells.
Ianto gave him ten breaths, then followed. Jenny was soon beside him. She whispered, "Who is he?"
"I need to meet his mistress." As did Jenny. Strax less so, but he too had come out into the street. "Let's follow him."
"Ah! A pursuit!"
Ianto grabbed his arm. "A quiet pursuit. Subterfuge." He placed his finger to his lips, hoping Strax would understand.
Jenny nodded helpfully. "We're being secret-like."
Together, the three of them watched Parker wander through the streets. They followed his steps, hanging back far enough to see his destination. Strax asked, "Are we going to disembowel him before or after the interrogation?"
"No disembowelling," said Jenny. "We talked about this."
"You're a nurse!" said Ianto, horrified.
"He's a good nurse. He's also a soldier. Keep up, yeah?" She moved ahead of them, scouting Parker's position. "He's looping back. I think he's headed to Paternoster Row."
The Paternoster Gang. Ianto glanced between them. They'd be famous one day, if only in Torchwood London's annals. Strax's stuffed body would gather dust in a warehouse. "Can you both work your way around from the other side? A pincer movement."
Strax nodded and immediately jogged away, hoping to cut off Parker. Jenny hung back. "Are you sure I shouldn't stay with you? It could be dangerous." For barely a second did he consider she was worried for her own sake.
"No, you'd best go with him and keep him from killing someone."
She sighed. "Right."
He watched her go, then hurried his steps. He wanted to reconnoitre on his own, although introducing the two women tonight would be high on his list of ideal moves. Parker staggered to a fine home, a bit shabby but exuding wealth. He slipped around the back. Servants' entrance, Ianto assumed, and he came closer.
Heavy curtains blocked all light from the imposing windows, yielding an impression of lamplight behind them. A quick look around found him one window where the drapery parted enough for a thin, yellow beam to wink out. He brought his eye closer, but could not see inside the house with such a narrow opening. He shouldn't tarry. Streetlights were few but present, and he risked being caught.
He made a note of the address and wandered down the street to where Strax and Jenny had just arrived. "Did you see him?" Ianto asked, before they could speak.
"No," Jenny said. "Did he get by you?"
"He must have. I'll try again tomorrow."
***
He made his way back to Jack's rented room with little trouble. London's streets hadn't changed their rambling routes so much by his day.
Jack was home when Ianto arrived, and he wasn't alone. His companion was pleasantly plump, pleasantly blonde, and pleasantly nude. She squeaked as Ianto came in, donning a light dress as rapidly as she could. Jack kept his blanket over himself, undisturbed and wearing his, "I need a post-coital nap" face. Ianto hadn't interrupted them in the middle, then.
"Sorry," he said to the young lady. "I should have knocked."
"Don't worry about it," Jack said. He sprawled back onto his bed. "On the table, if you please."
"Certainly." The woman placed some coins on the small table. "Same time next week, then?"
"Looking forward to it. Good night."
Before she walked out, she looked Ianto up and down. Jack said, loudly, "That's my cousin in from Cardiff." He didn't introduce them.
"Oh. He's pretty."
"He's spoken for. Good bye, Hazel." Jack waited until she'd closed the door. "Knocking's a good habit." He got out of the bed and collected the money into a small purse.
"Another bet?"
"A student. Sort of a friend, too."
Ianto sat down as Jack poured himself nearly clear water from a jug. "You always do have a way with people. What are you teaching her?"
"Sex. She wants to work in one of the high class houses, so I'm giving her some practise and advice."
Ianto's jaw snapped shut as the words trickled into his brain. The bed and the money on the table. "She's a prostitute and she's paying you?"
"She's looking for a higher paying clientèle and a better job. I'm not as picky, but I'm good at what I do."
"Which is?" He knew, though. He'd experienced Jack's skills first-hand many times. "Never mind. I thought you were a card sharp."
"I am. I'm also a pickpocket, a day-labourer, a hired gun, and when I'm in between those, I'll put the bite on anyone with enough push."
Ianto attempted to sort through that, and failed. "Oh."
Jack retrieved his trousers and examined them. Instead of pulling them on, he carefully laid them out over the edge of the table. "Does that bother you?"
"No." Yes, but he'd sort things over in his head on his own time. "I found the Silurian. Her name is Madame Vastra. I have her address, and I'm going to see about asking her for a job tomorrow."
"Obviously you had a good day's work, too. Tired?"
"Very." He'd barely slept last night, catching a short nap in the storage shed as Jack worked on the car. There wasn't much space in the room here, and all of it was taken up by the bed, the table, and the two little crates Jack used for chairs. Jack kept his clothes in a satchel under the bed, and his food in a bag hung outside the window.
As he watched, Jack lit a cigar from the candle.
"You smoke?"
He took a puff. "Sometimes? I don't worry about lung cancer."
"It just seems so.... It isn't you." Jack had been the one to nag Ianto about the occasional cigarette he'd still had after joining Torchwood Three, until Ianto had quit for good right after Lisa's death.
"If it bothers you, I'll put it out, Mother." Jack crushed the end and carefully stowed it for later before he winked out the candle.
Ianto lifted one crate atop the other, creating floor space. "Do you have a blanket I could borrow?" A pillow would be too much to ask. He removed his clothes down to his vest and pants. He'd borrowed Jack's spare garments today; his own would need modification before they could pass as contemporary.
Jack sat on the bed again. With a gesture, he pointed out the space beside him, the sheets still rumpled and stained from his tumble with Hazel. His bed was larger than the camp bed back home, but perhaps that was a professional expense. "Plenty of room up here."
"The floor is fine, thank you."
"Then no. This is the guest bed." He flopped back on the bed. He'd sleep for an hour or two, and he'd be fresh again. Ianto would steal the bed from him then, as he'd done countless times before. "I can behave myself, you know," Jack said.
"I know you can," said Ianto, uncomfortable on the hard floor and facing a growing worry of rats scurrying over him in the night. "I'm not so sure about myself. You are of course irresistible to all humanoid species."
Jack chuckled. "Of course." A few minutes passed, and his breath evened into sleep. Ianto listened to him, meanwhile straining his ears for rodent noises. No mice, no rats, just Jack in a rare moment, not yet knowing he'd have to see the entirety of the twentieth century pass before he found his heart's desire only to discover his heart wasn't there any longer.
Ianto loved him. He'd known for months how he felt, and he'd stopped denying the truth to himself. There was no need to tell his Jack, to risk scaring him away, or to risk being told his emotions weren't reciprocated. There was no point in telling this Jack, who barely knew him and was only tolerating him because Ianto had invoked the Doctor's name. He'd watch this Jack, not warning him of the years stretching before him, the heartbreaks and the lost friends yet to be, and he would ache for the pain this Jack was going to endure. Compared to that, rats weren't much.
***
Morning found him stiff and still tired. Jack had gone out, but he'd left the last of the bread on the table. Ianto ate it, reluctantly washing down the taste with some brackish water from the jug. Jack had plenty of liquor on hand, but Ianto felt showing up drunk on Madame Vastra's doorstep would give the wrong impression. He donned Jack's borrowed clothes again, wishing for a bath and a shave, and tracked back to Paternoster Row.
Madame Vastra's home was as formidable and forbidding by day as it had been last night. He stamped his feet on the pavement, walking by several times as he cased the property. If he kept this up, she'd think him a robber. What he needed was an opening. Parker again? Or did he dare set up his own luck? He'd read through the pamphlet on alien invasions again. Apparently not only were the Lysans on their way, but a mysterious illness was worming through parts of London's population. Torchwood had later declared the outbreak an unknown alien threat, never caught.
That made things easier if he didn't have to catch the aliens. He could use the illness to attract her attention, get into her confidence, and introduce her to Jenny.
As he mentally worked over this plan, he went back to the tavern where he'd met Parker, asking more questions both of Parker's mysterious employer, and of any rumours of the illness. We've never met her, said the patrons. Typhoid, said the landlord, and he'd made pointed gestures at the glass Ianto had carefully nursed half the day. Now that he knew how Jack was earning his keep, he couldn't face wasting a single penny. Regretfully, he shoved the glass away and went back out into the streets, aiming once more for Vastra's door.
He didn't reach it.
For the second time in less than a day, Ianto felt cold steel against his throat. Just like the last time, he gave his best effort not to think about meat cleavers. An elegant, strangely accented voice said, "You've been curious about me. I ate the last man who asked too many questions about me." There went his attempt not to think about the cannibals.
Through lips pressed close to fight back sudden panic, he exhaled with care. "I'm sure his inquiries were quite rude. One shouldn't have to tolerate rudeness."
"Spying on a woman is considered very rude."
"Merely performing reconnaissance before making myself known. I should like to know for certain that my potential employers aren't going to kill me on sight."
The sword relaxed a fraction of an inch. "Do your employers often try to kill you, Mr. Jones?"
"My last boss threatened to shoot me once."
"Did you deserve it?"
He didn't have to hesitate. "Yes. I threatened his life the same night. We patched things up later. Are you going to kill me, or can we continue this conversation in a more pleasant environment?"
She lowered her sword. "I wasn't going to kill you."
"You did threaten to eat me."
At last he was face to face with the lizard queen of Paternoster Row, and he found his own observation reflected back at him, saw the flicker of her eyes to his clothes, his hands. Under her veil, she was a green-scaled beauty, not his type but certainly high on the list of attractive, lithe beings he'd expect Jack to bring home for an educational romp on the subject of comparative anatomy.
"I'm not the first person to threaten to eat you," she said. "You wear your clothes all wrong, and your accent is odd. You're Welsh but not from a Wales I've ever encountered. Very curious."
"And you're a lizard woman from the dawn of time," he countered. "I'd make an excellent butler, and I'm used to working with and for non-humans."
"I don't recall placing an advertisement in the paper."
"I've found my best positions are those I've created for myself." He noticed that they were both pacing slowly, circling each other like polite sharks. She could wipe the floor with him, sword or no sword. She also quite clearly saw through the lies of his appearance.
"What do you want from me?"
"I want to help you," he said.
Vastra frowned, peering at him. "You do, don't you?" She turned her back to him. He'd think it a sign of trust, or of foolishness, but something in his bones said that if he made the slightest move against her now, his head would be rolling on the cobblestones within seconds. Ianto stood perfectly still, even as she spun and brought the sword once again next to his throat.
"What if I tell you I'm not interested in hiring a butler?" Her breath was cool against his neck. He wondered fleetingly if Vastra's body would be warm or cool, and wondered too how it must feel to lie next to her stretched out. But if she would fall in love with Jenny, he almost certainly wasn't her type, either.
"Then I'll be disappointed, and I'll ask again tomorrow."
She made a nose in her throat, midway between an annoyed cough and a laugh. The sword disappeared, sheathed but not out of the conversation. "I'll pay you eighteen shillings a week. Serve me well, and your pay will rise."
"Serve you poorly and I'm lunch?"
"Tea. You start tonight."
***
"I'm in," he told Jack when they met at the storage shed. "I've got a plan. There's some kind of sickness going around that Torchwood thought was alien. I'll have her help me investigate, bring Jenny in, and hopefully, they'll strike it off."
Jack's back was to him, body halfway under the bonnet of the car. "Not a bad plan. How are you going to keep yourself and the others from getting sick?"
He hadn't considered. "We'll have a nurse with us."
"A Sontaran nurse. Are you sure this isn't the first stage of a Sontaran stealth invasion? He comes to Earth posing as a nurse, infects the population to ready them for an attack, easy peasy." All this was muffled by the car. Jack had refitted the starter for the new energy source, but trying to revamp the internal combustion engine for lamp oil wasn't going so easily. He swore he could do it, but Ianto had begun to worry.
"I'm sure that's not the case. Sontarans aren't known for their subtlety." Martha had told them about the Sontaran involvement with the burning sky incident, so this was not altogether true. However, the concept of Strax as a secret agent was laughable enough to be uncomfortably plausible. "Besides, he claims to be a friend of the Doctor."
"Could be. Let me know if you want help. I'm pretty resilient when it comes to disease."
Ianto paused. This Jack hadn't necessarily made the important connections indicating the complexity of his condition. "You mean you can't die."
The *CLANG* of Jack's head hitting the bonnet as he rose up was loud enough for Ianto to wince in sympathy. He bent around the side to look at Ianto, and none too casually, said, "Pardon?"
"You've been stuck here fifteen years. Surely you've noticed your astonishingly good health." He oughtn't have mentioned. Jack had said something about not figuring out his condition for some time. He covered, "You don't get sick from your clients, for example."
"I thought I was just lucky." Jack swallowed, expression lost again. "Did I tell you how I got here?"
"You tried to follow the Doctor and Rose after they left the Game Station." He didn't point out that they'd abandoned Jack, not even leaving him for dead as Jack had told himself. The Doctor had known he was fine. This Jack still believed he'd been left behind by accident. He thought they missed him, and wanted him back, not that they'd gone off on holiday and left him to revive amongst the dead because the Doctor could no longer stand the sight of him.
"I woke up. I thought I'd been killed." He didn't mention the word 'Daleks' but Jack had always been reasonably good at concealing specific knowledge of the future. "I've been hoping to find them ever since. I need to show them I'm okay." He stared at Ianto. "You said I will."
"Yes." He'd find them, and he'd find out he'd been brushed off by the two people he thought had loved him most.
"Good." He went back to work, face conveniently hidden from where Ianto could read his mood. "Like I said, let me know if you want help."
***
Chapter Four
Author: nancybrown
Prompt: Back to the Future
Characters: Ianto, Jack, Jenny, Madame Vastra, Strax, Parker, Martha, Gwen
Rating: R
Warnings: violence, character death, mention of sexual assault, prostitution, language, and severe bending of time travel plausibility even taking all three canons into account
Spoilers: through TW: "Exit Wounds" and through DW: "The Snowmen"
Words: 32,500 (5,300 this part)
Beta: tymewyse and fide_et_spe both had a hand in making this far more comprehensible than it would have been. All remaining aspects of wtfery are mine alone.
Summary: Accidentally shot into the past by a time-travelling car, Ianto has to fix his own mistakes or he won't have a future to go back to.
AN: Written for reel_torchwood Screening 6. Also fills the Trope Bingo space: au:fusion
Disclaimer: BBC, Universal, RTD, Steven Moffat, and Robert Zemeckis own these characters and situations, and want nothing to do with this ridiculous fluff piece of faux-Victoriana.
Chapter One
Chapter Two
***
Chapter Three
***
Jack had acquired tea for Ianto, and something golden in a bottle for himself. Not for the first time, Ianto recalled that although he performed many little tasks for Jack, Jack had always been perfectly capable of doing them for himself. He no doubt found Ianto's role as batman/butler more a novelty than a necessity. Around this time in his thought process, Ianto would remind himself how little Jack really needed him, and how the sane thing for both of them would be to end their affair before they started pretending otherwise. That usually was directly followed by seeing Jack, and feeling that uncomfortable mixed rush of emotions, and sanity could push off, thank you.
He drank his tea, and thought about time.
"If your friend Jenny was supposed to be rescued from her attackers by the Silurian, then maybe she developed a knight in shining armour complex."
"But I got in the way."
"Which would explain why she was making eyes at you instead."
To be quite fair, he didn't mind at all. Women had never singled him out as particularly good-looking. Lisa had been a rare and welcome exception, frank in her admiration both for his looks and his mind. It felt nice to be the receiving end of the attention, which had been a large factor in his choice to shag the man sitting across from him. Jack's continued interest and unashamed admiration had performed wonders with Ianto's self-confidence. As much as he enjoyed the thought of Jenny being attracted to him now, he'd found the person who fit his own damage best, and he knew her heart was far better suited to another.
He wondered if he'd ever have the chance to thank his Jack for teaching him this lesson by example.
"If she doesn't fall in love with the lizard queen, Torchwood won't approve the charter for the London branch."
"Silurian. Who's Torchwood?" Jack's eyes were innocent.
Ianto looked away, staring into his tea instead of at Jack. Oh, they're the organisation who'll capture and torture you to death until they get bored, then they'll make you an offer you can't refuse. From their inestimable ranks, you'll make loads of friends and take dozens of lovers, all of whom will die miserably. You'll wind up in charge after everyone else is dead, a king sitting on a throne of bones. I'm so sorry.
"It's the company I work for." Ianto pulled out his mobile again. "Owen told me that if it wasn't for Torchwood, he'd have been dead within six months after his fiancée was killed." Toshiko wouldn't have been better off, probably dying in a UNIT cell. Ianto would never have met Lisa, never met Jack. He'd be alive, but still unsure of himself and his life. Eight hundred people, including Adeola and Lisa, wouldn't have been murdered by Daleks and Cybermen. Owen and Tosh were still dead, too. Torchwood hadn't saved them, only delayed the inevitable.
"Without the pair of them, your history unravels. This is bad."
"Easily solved, though. I'll just explain to Jenny she needs to meet the lizard queen, introduce them, and time should be sorted out again." Guilt reminded him of their fate, but what could he do?
"Not so fast," said Jack. "You'll wind up making things worse if you just tell her."
"I don't see how. She seems intelligent. She knows about time travel."
"So do you. Think about your sweetheart back home for a minute."
Ianto took a long look at Jack and hoped his face didn't give everything away. "All right."
"Now picture Jacob von Hogflume walking up to you."
"Who?"
Jack opened his mouth to explain, then said, "Never mind. Someone you don't know walks up to you as you were ten years ago to explain that whatever your plans might be, it's your destiny to fall in love with this person you haven't even met. Here's their picture, oh and by the by, if you don't, the world will end. Think about what that would do to you."
"But Jenny was supposed to meet her last night. She's obviously at the right moment."
"And if that imaginary time traveller had told you the night before you met your current flame the same thing, what would you have done?"
He didn't have to consider. "I wouldn't have believed them. I'd still have done everything exactly the same."
Jack smiled at him knowingly. "No, you wouldn't. Armed with the knowledge, you'd either give up on the person you were already seeing and accept your destiny, or you'd run as fast and as hard as you could away from it. Both choices would be a disaster for you and your lover. If you chose to be with them, you'd never know if you stayed for love or because you were scared, and if you left, you'd destroy your own future."
"Third option. I'm my own time traveller, and I play Christmas Yet To Come for myself, and make sure young me knows he's going to break my heart."
Jack rolled his eyes. "And that's how I know you're not a Time Agent. Free advice: pretend you don't know anything about your future, and maybe it'll still be there when you get home."
"Says the man wallowing in future knowledge." Not that Jack shared. Not that he knew or told them anything useful, not until it was far too late and all the bodies that could be found were buried.
"I'm a trained expert. You're a monkey with a Gatling gun. I use what I know when there's no other way. You can't tell Jenny. If she's supposed to fall in love with this Silurian woman, she has to do it on her own terms."
Jack was right, the annoying prick. In no future did the fantasy end well of walking up to Jenny and explaining to her that she needed to start shagging a lizard woman. "Then how on Earth do I fix this?"
Jack's face scrunched in thought, then smoothed out in delight. "I have the perfect plan!"
"Does it involve inviting them both into your bed for a fling and hoping they'll fall for each other mid-shag?"
Jack paused, and said without any credibility, " ….no?"
Ianto resisted the urge to sigh. "Not every problem can be solved by the quick application of your penis."
"Hey, there's nothing 'quick' about my penis, thank you."
He let this pass before it turned into a pass. "You're in London because of rumours. Did you have any leads on the lizard queen?"
"Silurian," Jack enunciated slowly. Ianto bit back a snappish reply. Jack wasn't all human himself. He might shoot aliens when required, but he considered it basic courtesy to pronounce their names properly, and to ask for their numbers in the morning. "As far as I can tell, she's been spotted in the same area of the city as Jenny and Strax, but she's rarely spotted. She covers her tracks well."
"Then we need to attract her attention."
Jack put his hand up between them. "There is no 'we' here. I'll get the time machine up and running. You figure out how to play matchmaker."
"You said there was no hope on the time machine."
Jack stretched back in his three-legged stool. From what was surely too small a pocket, he produced a much-folded pamphlet. Ianto recognised the clip art cover to "A brief history of alien invasions in London, 1875-1900." He grabbed for it, but Jack was faster.
"You shouldn't have that."
He was met with a familiar grin that showed a bit too much teeth. Jack might have a matinee-idol smile, but so did the animatronic star of Jaws. He said, "I'm looking for signs of the Doctor. I had to know if he was coming to visit."
"I told you...."
Jack interrupted. "While I was peeking, I noticed there's good news. The Lysans are going to invade in a week."
"This is good news?"
"Their weapons discharge with a particular power cell that I may be able to rig the car to use. Get your speed up to 88 KPH at the moment you're shot by a Lysan cruiser, and you go back to the future."
"In the middle of an alien invasion."
Jack scoffed. "Hardly an invasion. Lysans are allergic to Earth's oceans. I'll spray them with a little enchantment from under the sea, they'll go home before tea."
This time, Ianto did grab the pamphlet. "You can't read through the future to find out things like that."
"I didn't," said Jack, annoyed. He tried to snatch the crumpling paper back. "I dated a Lysan guy once. That's how I know about the ocean thing. Now I'm using my advance knowledge of the future to get your pathetic arse home."
They glared at each other across the rickety work bench. Ianto dropped his eyes first. "Sorry."
"She'll need help," Jack said.
"Who?"
"The Silurian." He'd switched subjects as if the argument had never happened. Forgiveness had always been one of Jack's virtues. That, or as Ianto had often suspected, despite possessing the relative lifespan of a giant tortoise, Jack also possessed the relative memory of a goldfish. "You said she had scales, so she's not impersonating a human. She'll need human helpers, servants. People to fetch and buy and do for her."
"Right. She can't just walk into Marks & Spencer."
"Into what?"
"Never mind. Go on."
"That's all I've got. She'll have human agents working for her, which means she'll have money to pay them. Find the money, find the servants, find the Silurian."
Ianto shuddered again at the mental image of Yvonne's wall. He'd seen her face.
***
Strax was out on a house call when she got back with the money. Jenny opened the safe they'd acquired from that last empty house, counting out what they had. Last night's job hadn't been worth the aggravation, although meeting her new friend was a nice perquisite, and he'd paid up more than enough for Strax's work. Little bonuses were everywhere, if you knew how to look. Filching extra from his friend wasn't nearly as good an investment as finding another contact who knew the Doctor.
Done with her counting, she took what she'd need for today's meals and stowed the rest. Given enough time, they'd set up a proper clinic with a doctor instead of a midnight surgery and constantly having to pay off the local constable on their beat.
She heard Strax stomping up the stairs. "You're back. Did he pay you?"
"With interest. His friend's an interesting one. A Captain." She didn't know why she blushed when she said the word, and aimed for pretending she hadn't.
"A proud seaman, is he?"
She parsed his words twice before she was certain of his meaning. "More of a pirate, I'd say. Be worth something to keep an eye on that one. We got anyone near there who owes us a favour?" And if they didn't, she'd make a point of keeping an eye on them herself.
***
Just as with finding Jack, a few inquiries went a long way. He dared not ask Jenny's aid yet, though that would have made the search much easier. Within a day, Ianto had identified a man named Parker as a likely candidate for the Silurian's human agent. His employer's name wasn't well-known, although her veiled face was. Ianto caught up with him at another dark pub, buying the man drinks with money borrowed from Jack.
"My lady doesn't like having her name around," he said between gulps of whisky. Whatever he'd seen earlier today, Parker was more than happy to dissolve the memory. Ianto'd found him seeking out the company of certain women of ill-repute. Whisky wasn't his only personal Retcon pill.
"I understand. Discretion is a virtue." Ianto nodded to the landlord, and put out more coins with an indication to keep the drink flowing. "I'd heard that your mistress might be looking for servants."
"Where would you be hearing that?" His question was sharper than Ianto had expected. He'd thought the man more drunk.
Carefully, he shrugged. "Around. They say she doesn't walk around in daylight on her own. You do for her."
"That I do."
"I'm in from Cardiff, you see. We have a peculiar, even extraordinary connexion to other worlds. It's called the Rift." He spoke quietly. "I've met travellers from other planets orbiting other suns."
Parker's eyes went wide. "What's in this glass?" he asked, pushing it aside. "I've never heard such madness." He went to stand. Ianto held up a hand, nudging him back into his stool.
"I've worked for masters and mistresses who weren't quite human, but they were humane, if you understand me. It's hard on a body who looks like a demon to do the work of an angel. I've been in service for years. I'd prefer offering my service to someone who needs me."
Parker watched him. He took a long drink of his whisky, and he didn't object to the top off. After a while, he said, "Madame Vastra has many enemies. Terrible and wicked folk, who stalk the streets and hurt the innocent. She stands up for them. Rescues them. She's a good woman, the best."
Ianto nodded eagerly. "Precisely the kind of person I want to meet."
Parker had a blade suddenly in his hand and against Ianto's neck, assaulting Ianto's nose with the strong scent of his soap. "So when some blighter comes asking questions about her, I get concerned. How do I know you're trustworthy?"
"Ianto!" bellowed a voice from the entrance to the pub. Strax marched in, a wide grin on his potato face. "I thought I'd find you here. Did you find your friend?"
"Yes, thank you," Ianto said. Thank God he'd been able to find Strax's practise when Jenny was out, and had arranged to meet him. The shock and admiration on Parker's face was well worth the risk. "I was just explaining to Mr. Parker here that I have been among non-humans before."
"Indeed," said Strax. "And better for the experience." He turned, his whole body going with him. "Ah, and there's Miss Jenny. As soon as I told her I was meeting you, she insisted on joining me."
"But you didn't arrive together," said Parker, as Jenny joined them at the bar completely at home. She'd done something with her hair, making pretty ringlets around her face, and she wore a hint of rouge.
"Fancy meeting you here," she said breathlessly to Ianto. He smiled back, and stood to offer her his seat.
"Nah, I'll sit here," she said, plopping herself on another stool. "New friend?" She stuck out her hand as Ianto tried to introduce Parker.
"Actually," he said, hitting on a grand idea. "Mr. Parker, perhaps you could introduce us all to Madame Vastra right now?" Two birds, one stone. It'd be perfect.
Parker didn't like the idea, face clouding as he took in Strax and Jenny. "I'm sorry, I've said too much as it is."
"Perhaps another time," Ianto said, hoping he didn't sound desperate.
"Perhaps." Parker made his farewells.
Ianto gave him ten breaths, then followed. Jenny was soon beside him. She whispered, "Who is he?"
"I need to meet his mistress." As did Jenny. Strax less so, but he too had come out into the street. "Let's follow him."
"Ah! A pursuit!"
Ianto grabbed his arm. "A quiet pursuit. Subterfuge." He placed his finger to his lips, hoping Strax would understand.
Jenny nodded helpfully. "We're being secret-like."
Together, the three of them watched Parker wander through the streets. They followed his steps, hanging back far enough to see his destination. Strax asked, "Are we going to disembowel him before or after the interrogation?"
"No disembowelling," said Jenny. "We talked about this."
"You're a nurse!" said Ianto, horrified.
"He's a good nurse. He's also a soldier. Keep up, yeah?" She moved ahead of them, scouting Parker's position. "He's looping back. I think he's headed to Paternoster Row."
The Paternoster Gang. Ianto glanced between them. They'd be famous one day, if only in Torchwood London's annals. Strax's stuffed body would gather dust in a warehouse. "Can you both work your way around from the other side? A pincer movement."
Strax nodded and immediately jogged away, hoping to cut off Parker. Jenny hung back. "Are you sure I shouldn't stay with you? It could be dangerous." For barely a second did he consider she was worried for her own sake.
"No, you'd best go with him and keep him from killing someone."
She sighed. "Right."
He watched her go, then hurried his steps. He wanted to reconnoitre on his own, although introducing the two women tonight would be high on his list of ideal moves. Parker staggered to a fine home, a bit shabby but exuding wealth. He slipped around the back. Servants' entrance, Ianto assumed, and he came closer.
Heavy curtains blocked all light from the imposing windows, yielding an impression of lamplight behind them. A quick look around found him one window where the drapery parted enough for a thin, yellow beam to wink out. He brought his eye closer, but could not see inside the house with such a narrow opening. He shouldn't tarry. Streetlights were few but present, and he risked being caught.
He made a note of the address and wandered down the street to where Strax and Jenny had just arrived. "Did you see him?" Ianto asked, before they could speak.
"No," Jenny said. "Did he get by you?"
"He must have. I'll try again tomorrow."
***
He made his way back to Jack's rented room with little trouble. London's streets hadn't changed their rambling routes so much by his day.
Jack was home when Ianto arrived, and he wasn't alone. His companion was pleasantly plump, pleasantly blonde, and pleasantly nude. She squeaked as Ianto came in, donning a light dress as rapidly as she could. Jack kept his blanket over himself, undisturbed and wearing his, "I need a post-coital nap" face. Ianto hadn't interrupted them in the middle, then.
"Sorry," he said to the young lady. "I should have knocked."
"Don't worry about it," Jack said. He sprawled back onto his bed. "On the table, if you please."
"Certainly." The woman placed some coins on the small table. "Same time next week, then?"
"Looking forward to it. Good night."
Before she walked out, she looked Ianto up and down. Jack said, loudly, "That's my cousin in from Cardiff." He didn't introduce them.
"Oh. He's pretty."
"He's spoken for. Good bye, Hazel." Jack waited until she'd closed the door. "Knocking's a good habit." He got out of the bed and collected the money into a small purse.
"Another bet?"
"A student. Sort of a friend, too."
Ianto sat down as Jack poured himself nearly clear water from a jug. "You always do have a way with people. What are you teaching her?"
"Sex. She wants to work in one of the high class houses, so I'm giving her some practise and advice."
Ianto's jaw snapped shut as the words trickled into his brain. The bed and the money on the table. "She's a prostitute and she's paying you?"
"She's looking for a higher paying clientèle and a better job. I'm not as picky, but I'm good at what I do."
"Which is?" He knew, though. He'd experienced Jack's skills first-hand many times. "Never mind. I thought you were a card sharp."
"I am. I'm also a pickpocket, a day-labourer, a hired gun, and when I'm in between those, I'll put the bite on anyone with enough push."
Ianto attempted to sort through that, and failed. "Oh."
Jack retrieved his trousers and examined them. Instead of pulling them on, he carefully laid them out over the edge of the table. "Does that bother you?"
"No." Yes, but he'd sort things over in his head on his own time. "I found the Silurian. Her name is Madame Vastra. I have her address, and I'm going to see about asking her for a job tomorrow."
"Obviously you had a good day's work, too. Tired?"
"Very." He'd barely slept last night, catching a short nap in the storage shed as Jack worked on the car. There wasn't much space in the room here, and all of it was taken up by the bed, the table, and the two little crates Jack used for chairs. Jack kept his clothes in a satchel under the bed, and his food in a bag hung outside the window.
As he watched, Jack lit a cigar from the candle.
"You smoke?"
He took a puff. "Sometimes? I don't worry about lung cancer."
"It just seems so.... It isn't you." Jack had been the one to nag Ianto about the occasional cigarette he'd still had after joining Torchwood Three, until Ianto had quit for good right after Lisa's death.
"If it bothers you, I'll put it out, Mother." Jack crushed the end and carefully stowed it for later before he winked out the candle.
Ianto lifted one crate atop the other, creating floor space. "Do you have a blanket I could borrow?" A pillow would be too much to ask. He removed his clothes down to his vest and pants. He'd borrowed Jack's spare garments today; his own would need modification before they could pass as contemporary.
Jack sat on the bed again. With a gesture, he pointed out the space beside him, the sheets still rumpled and stained from his tumble with Hazel. His bed was larger than the camp bed back home, but perhaps that was a professional expense. "Plenty of room up here."
"The floor is fine, thank you."
"Then no. This is the guest bed." He flopped back on the bed. He'd sleep for an hour or two, and he'd be fresh again. Ianto would steal the bed from him then, as he'd done countless times before. "I can behave myself, you know," Jack said.
"I know you can," said Ianto, uncomfortable on the hard floor and facing a growing worry of rats scurrying over him in the night. "I'm not so sure about myself. You are of course irresistible to all humanoid species."
Jack chuckled. "Of course." A few minutes passed, and his breath evened into sleep. Ianto listened to him, meanwhile straining his ears for rodent noises. No mice, no rats, just Jack in a rare moment, not yet knowing he'd have to see the entirety of the twentieth century pass before he found his heart's desire only to discover his heart wasn't there any longer.
Ianto loved him. He'd known for months how he felt, and he'd stopped denying the truth to himself. There was no need to tell his Jack, to risk scaring him away, or to risk being told his emotions weren't reciprocated. There was no point in telling this Jack, who barely knew him and was only tolerating him because Ianto had invoked the Doctor's name. He'd watch this Jack, not warning him of the years stretching before him, the heartbreaks and the lost friends yet to be, and he would ache for the pain this Jack was going to endure. Compared to that, rats weren't much.
***
Morning found him stiff and still tired. Jack had gone out, but he'd left the last of the bread on the table. Ianto ate it, reluctantly washing down the taste with some brackish water from the jug. Jack had plenty of liquor on hand, but Ianto felt showing up drunk on Madame Vastra's doorstep would give the wrong impression. He donned Jack's borrowed clothes again, wishing for a bath and a shave, and tracked back to Paternoster Row.
Madame Vastra's home was as formidable and forbidding by day as it had been last night. He stamped his feet on the pavement, walking by several times as he cased the property. If he kept this up, she'd think him a robber. What he needed was an opening. Parker again? Or did he dare set up his own luck? He'd read through the pamphlet on alien invasions again. Apparently not only were the Lysans on their way, but a mysterious illness was worming through parts of London's population. Torchwood had later declared the outbreak an unknown alien threat, never caught.
That made things easier if he didn't have to catch the aliens. He could use the illness to attract her attention, get into her confidence, and introduce her to Jenny.
As he mentally worked over this plan, he went back to the tavern where he'd met Parker, asking more questions both of Parker's mysterious employer, and of any rumours of the illness. We've never met her, said the patrons. Typhoid, said the landlord, and he'd made pointed gestures at the glass Ianto had carefully nursed half the day. Now that he knew how Jack was earning his keep, he couldn't face wasting a single penny. Regretfully, he shoved the glass away and went back out into the streets, aiming once more for Vastra's door.
He didn't reach it.
For the second time in less than a day, Ianto felt cold steel against his throat. Just like the last time, he gave his best effort not to think about meat cleavers. An elegant, strangely accented voice said, "You've been curious about me. I ate the last man who asked too many questions about me." There went his attempt not to think about the cannibals.
Through lips pressed close to fight back sudden panic, he exhaled with care. "I'm sure his inquiries were quite rude. One shouldn't have to tolerate rudeness."
"Spying on a woman is considered very rude."
"Merely performing reconnaissance before making myself known. I should like to know for certain that my potential employers aren't going to kill me on sight."
The sword relaxed a fraction of an inch. "Do your employers often try to kill you, Mr. Jones?"
"My last boss threatened to shoot me once."
"Did you deserve it?"
He didn't have to hesitate. "Yes. I threatened his life the same night. We patched things up later. Are you going to kill me, or can we continue this conversation in a more pleasant environment?"
She lowered her sword. "I wasn't going to kill you."
"You did threaten to eat me."
At last he was face to face with the lizard queen of Paternoster Row, and he found his own observation reflected back at him, saw the flicker of her eyes to his clothes, his hands. Under her veil, she was a green-scaled beauty, not his type but certainly high on the list of attractive, lithe beings he'd expect Jack to bring home for an educational romp on the subject of comparative anatomy.
"I'm not the first person to threaten to eat you," she said. "You wear your clothes all wrong, and your accent is odd. You're Welsh but not from a Wales I've ever encountered. Very curious."
"And you're a lizard woman from the dawn of time," he countered. "I'd make an excellent butler, and I'm used to working with and for non-humans."
"I don't recall placing an advertisement in the paper."
"I've found my best positions are those I've created for myself." He noticed that they were both pacing slowly, circling each other like polite sharks. She could wipe the floor with him, sword or no sword. She also quite clearly saw through the lies of his appearance.
"What do you want from me?"
"I want to help you," he said.
Vastra frowned, peering at him. "You do, don't you?" She turned her back to him. He'd think it a sign of trust, or of foolishness, but something in his bones said that if he made the slightest move against her now, his head would be rolling on the cobblestones within seconds. Ianto stood perfectly still, even as she spun and brought the sword once again next to his throat.
"What if I tell you I'm not interested in hiring a butler?" Her breath was cool against his neck. He wondered fleetingly if Vastra's body would be warm or cool, and wondered too how it must feel to lie next to her stretched out. But if she would fall in love with Jenny, he almost certainly wasn't her type, either.
"Then I'll be disappointed, and I'll ask again tomorrow."
She made a nose in her throat, midway between an annoyed cough and a laugh. The sword disappeared, sheathed but not out of the conversation. "I'll pay you eighteen shillings a week. Serve me well, and your pay will rise."
"Serve you poorly and I'm lunch?"
"Tea. You start tonight."
***
"I'm in," he told Jack when they met at the storage shed. "I've got a plan. There's some kind of sickness going around that Torchwood thought was alien. I'll have her help me investigate, bring Jenny in, and hopefully, they'll strike it off."
Jack's back was to him, body halfway under the bonnet of the car. "Not a bad plan. How are you going to keep yourself and the others from getting sick?"
He hadn't considered. "We'll have a nurse with us."
"A Sontaran nurse. Are you sure this isn't the first stage of a Sontaran stealth invasion? He comes to Earth posing as a nurse, infects the population to ready them for an attack, easy peasy." All this was muffled by the car. Jack had refitted the starter for the new energy source, but trying to revamp the internal combustion engine for lamp oil wasn't going so easily. He swore he could do it, but Ianto had begun to worry.
"I'm sure that's not the case. Sontarans aren't known for their subtlety." Martha had told them about the Sontaran involvement with the burning sky incident, so this was not altogether true. However, the concept of Strax as a secret agent was laughable enough to be uncomfortably plausible. "Besides, he claims to be a friend of the Doctor."
"Could be. Let me know if you want help. I'm pretty resilient when it comes to disease."
Ianto paused. This Jack hadn't necessarily made the important connections indicating the complexity of his condition. "You mean you can't die."
The *CLANG* of Jack's head hitting the bonnet as he rose up was loud enough for Ianto to wince in sympathy. He bent around the side to look at Ianto, and none too casually, said, "Pardon?"
"You've been stuck here fifteen years. Surely you've noticed your astonishingly good health." He oughtn't have mentioned. Jack had said something about not figuring out his condition for some time. He covered, "You don't get sick from your clients, for example."
"I thought I was just lucky." Jack swallowed, expression lost again. "Did I tell you how I got here?"
"You tried to follow the Doctor and Rose after they left the Game Station." He didn't point out that they'd abandoned Jack, not even leaving him for dead as Jack had told himself. The Doctor had known he was fine. This Jack still believed he'd been left behind by accident. He thought they missed him, and wanted him back, not that they'd gone off on holiday and left him to revive amongst the dead because the Doctor could no longer stand the sight of him.
"I woke up. I thought I'd been killed." He didn't mention the word 'Daleks' but Jack had always been reasonably good at concealing specific knowledge of the future. "I've been hoping to find them ever since. I need to show them I'm okay." He stared at Ianto. "You said I will."
"Yes." He'd find them, and he'd find out he'd been brushed off by the two people he thought had loved him most.
"Good." He went back to work, face conveniently hidden from where Ianto could read his mood. "Like I said, let me know if you want help."
***
Chapter Four