Grenade
» Grenade. Kyuhae. Drama, Romance. 1638 words.
Tell the devil I said "hey" when you get back to where you're from.
A/N: This song is so damn catchy!!!1
SONG: "Grenade" - Bruno Mars
Something ticks in the back of Donghae's mind when he sees Kyuhyun, much in the way of a broken clock whose second hand is stuck; the ticking continues, but never moves past that one number, making you trapped in that minute for what seems like eternity. Kyuhyun is an enigma, something impossibly complex and bizarre and something that Donghae just can't seem to wrap his mind around, no matter how many hours he sits there and attempts to analyze the younger man.
It started one night when Kyuhyun was with the group just a few months, when they were both giddy thanks to a few too many bottles of Soju and they were abandoned by the rest of the group in the middle of Namsan. There were plenty of people around, of course, considering it was the middle of July around eight at night, but that didn't matter. In that moment, there was only the two of them, laying in the grass with entwined fingers, briefly touching lips, and the heavy, suffocating smell of alcohol.
"What is this," Donghae had said, his hand moving to Kyuhyun's cheek; his skin was soft, despite the small bumps from his acne.
Kyuhyun simply smiled. "Who gives a shit?" He replied with a shrug. "Just enjoy it."
Donghae did.
Was that the moment Donghae fell in love with Kyuhyun? No, probably not --
Definitely not, because when Kyuhyun barely said a word to him to following morning, when he acted like nothing had ever happened, Donghae was hardly fazed. There was no jealousy when Kyuhyun went right back to fawning over Sungmin.
Well. Maybe a little.
But a little jealousy was understandable, considering there were no implications of them not being a couple just the night before. There were just also no implications that they even were one.
Autumn was the season that really did it in for Donghae, that really made him realize that Kyuhyun meant more to him than the maknae. Much more than the maknae, or his bandmate, or even a friend. He was Kyuhyun, Donghae numero dos. A force to be reckoned with.
Kyuhyun came home drunk one night - he had supposedly (most likely) been out with Changmin, and Donghae had been on the couch, watching some movie that was really not holding his attention. Kyuhyun stumbled in like a bull in a china shop, smacking into the counter and giggling so loud he could have woken up the whole building. But that wasn't what Donghae noticed; what he noticed were the large marks on the younger man's neck, violet and yellow, already bruising. Donghae remembers thinking Changmin must've had a real set of chompers.
But then Kyuhyun is falling on him and the jealousy that he'd only relatively noticed as being existent was suddenly gone in a flash. Instead, taking its place was Kyuhyun's thick breath, the sent of alcohol lingering in the air between them and stinging Donghae's nose. And Kyuhyun's smile - those perfectly-straight pearls and the curve of his lips that makes Donghae's knees weak. That was there, too.
"Hyung," Kyuhyun breathed. "Let's make out."
And suddenly he could taste the alcohol in his mouth; Kyuhyun's tongue, soft and velvety, still dripping in the bittersweet liquid. The ticking started here, if Donghae can recall correctly, the constant questioning of Kyuhyun's (and his own) sanity, and just why things were the way they were.
The way they are, rather.
This version of Kyuhyun was not a constant. He was temporary, momentary. Brief. Only after a few too many drinks would he emerge from the depths and wreak havoc on Donghae's psyche.
Christmas Eve is a fiasco every year at the Super Junior dorms; weveryone is present, along with girlfriends and boyfriends and whoever friends. Heechul is drunk by six thirty, hanging on Hankyung as if he couldn't breathe unless it was from oxygen directly from Hankyung's lips. Siwon shows off his girlfriend, Eunhyuk sits a little too close to Donghae for his liking and Kyuhyun and Sungmin make out incessantly under the mistletoe. Donghae tried to pretend it didn't bother him, like he didn't even see the way Kyuhyun's hands slipped into the back of Sungmin's pants, cupping one cheek in each hand and squeezing. But he did see it, and oh, it bothered him more than he would ever admit.
Eunhyuk was the first one to notice there was something wrong with Donghae, naturally. Considering the two were once the Lee Brothers, inseparable; one was never found without the other.
"Donghae," Eunhyuk had said. The familiarity in his voice stung Donghae. "What is going on?"
"I'm fine," Donghae had replied. "Honestly, Hyukjae. I'm fine. Don't worry about me."
"I'm going to worry," Eunhyuk said softly, barely above a whisper. "You're my brother, practically. You've been different ever since...well, ever since he came into the picture."
"There is nothing going on between Kyuhyun and I," Donghae breathed; he tried to speak loud, confidently like normal. But he just couldn't muster the energy. It hurt to admit the lack of relationship between he and the maknae.
"Donghae," Eunhyuk said, in that tone of voice where he just knows.
That was all he needed to say before Donghae crumbled.
The two sat outside the local convenience store, clutching extra large slushies in their cold hands, like two teenagers after their final exams. January was finally upon them in full swing, the stinging emptiness that accompanies it in full force.
Eunhyuk took a sip of his cherry slush. "So how did it start?" He asked. Donghae looked to him. "You being in love with Kyuhyun or whatever."
Donghae paused, looked at his slush. Was he really that transparent? "I dunno," He said flatly, taking a sip. Blue raspberry. "It just sort of...happened."
"Nothing just happens," Eunhyuk said. "They happen because of some sort of event. So tell me, what was it?"
Donghae paused. He didn't remember; all he remembered was the multiple times he made out with Kyuhyun, unknown to Sungmin, who would have been devastated had he found out. "I don't know, honestly."
Eunhyuk sighed. "Are you going to tell him?"
"Never," Donghae replied.
Eunhyuk finished his slush and threw the empty cup on the ground. Lifted his foot and crushed it in one blow. "Why not?"
"He has Sungmin," was all Donghae said.
"He also has you," Eunhyuk said. "Obviously you have a chance if he's making out with you behind his boyfriend's back."
Donghae nodded.
"So do something about it," Eunhyuk said, grinning. That sort of grin where it almost hurt to look at.
Donghae nodded again.
It was raining that day. The third of March.
The third of March was the day Donghae finally mustered up the courage, finally grew a pair as Eunhyuk kept saying, over and over and over until Donghae finally snapped and whacked him hard over the head. It took a lot of preparation, a lot of thinking and analyzing and planning, but on the third of March, he was ready.
Kyuhyun pulled a small carton out of his pocket, with large red lettering and Donghae nearly died.
"You smoke?" He asked, his voice cracking. Kyuhyun raised an eyebrow and held out the carton; candy cigarettes. Oh.
"So what are we doing here, hyung?" Kyuhyun asked. "Kind of random, bringing me to Namsan when it's pouring out."
Donghae breathed in, and it was as if Kyuhyun was smoking three cigarettes at one time and blowing the smoke directly into Donghae's throat. Suffocating. "We need to talk."
"'Kay," Kyuhyun said simply, pulling a long candy stick out of the carton and snipping off the end. The crunch made Donghae shudder. "Shoot."
Donghae paused. That was it? There were no probing questions, no smartass remarks? He just gave Donghae the floor as if it were nothing. "I, um..." Donghae started, eyes averting to the ground. His face was burning so hot, he couldn't even look Kyuhyun in the face. "I love you."
Kyuhyun's breathing stopped momentarily, and Donghae nearly choked on his own tongue. He could handle rejection, he could handle harsh words. But Donghae could not handle silence.
"I know," Kyuhyun said.
"You...know," Donghae repeated. Kyuhyun nodded, took another bite of his candy.
"Yeah, how could I not?" He replied, a smirk tugging at his lips. "It's obvious, hyung. Even Sungmin knows it."
Donghae blinked. "So, why..." He started.
"Do I keep tormenting you?" Kyuhyun asked, tilting his head. Donghae nodded. "I dunno."
Donghae's brow furrowed. "You don't know?"
Kyuhyun shrugged. "I dunno, hyung. You're a good kisser. I like you. I dunno if I love you, but I like you."
"Well, if you're going to just like me, can you not?" Donghae asked. "I mean, you keep jerking me around like a fucking ragdoll. One second we're making out on the couch and the next you're hanging on Sungmin like he's your life support. You can't have us both, Kyuhyun."
The rain let up momentarily, the sky still littered with dark clouds but the onslaught of wetness finally ceasing. Donghae looked up for a second to see if the sun was going to come out; no dice.
Kyuhyun took the piece of candy out of his mouth and tossed it on the ground, crunching it with his shoe as if it were actually alight. Donghae furrowed his brow further.
He nearly fainted when Kyuhyun wrapped his arms around him and pulled him into a soft kiss.
"I'm sorry," Kyuhyun said as he pulled away. "That I've been fucking around with you like this."
Donghae raised an eyebrow. "What are you saying?"
Kyuhyun laughed, leaned forward and kissed Donghae's forehead. "Shut up, hyung."
That night, Sungmin spent the majority of his night crying, as did Donghae. The only difference being that Donghae was actually in good spirits.
a/n 2: i don't like this very much but whatever, i'm rusty. And make sure you check out my request's post!
Tell the devil I said "hey" when you get back to where you're from.
A/N: This song is so damn catchy!!!1
SONG: "Grenade" - Bruno Mars
Something ticks in the back of Donghae's mind when he sees Kyuhyun, much in the way of a broken clock whose second hand is stuck; the ticking continues, but never moves past that one number, making you trapped in that minute for what seems like eternity. Kyuhyun is an enigma, something impossibly complex and bizarre and something that Donghae just can't seem to wrap his mind around, no matter how many hours he sits there and attempts to analyze the younger man.
It started one night when Kyuhyun was with the group just a few months, when they were both giddy thanks to a few too many bottles of Soju and they were abandoned by the rest of the group in the middle of Namsan. There were plenty of people around, of course, considering it was the middle of July around eight at night, but that didn't matter. In that moment, there was only the two of them, laying in the grass with entwined fingers, briefly touching lips, and the heavy, suffocating smell of alcohol.
"What is this," Donghae had said, his hand moving to Kyuhyun's cheek; his skin was soft, despite the small bumps from his acne.
Kyuhyun simply smiled. "Who gives a shit?" He replied with a shrug. "Just enjoy it."
Donghae did.
Was that the moment Donghae fell in love with Kyuhyun? No, probably not --
Definitely not, because when Kyuhyun barely said a word to him to following morning, when he acted like nothing had ever happened, Donghae was hardly fazed. There was no jealousy when Kyuhyun went right back to fawning over Sungmin.
Well. Maybe a little.
But a little jealousy was understandable, considering there were no implications of them not being a couple just the night before. There were just also no implications that they even were one.
Autumn was the season that really did it in for Donghae, that really made him realize that Kyuhyun meant more to him than the maknae. Much more than the maknae, or his bandmate, or even a friend. He was Kyuhyun, Donghae numero dos. A force to be reckoned with.
Kyuhyun came home drunk one night - he had supposedly (most likely) been out with Changmin, and Donghae had been on the couch, watching some movie that was really not holding his attention. Kyuhyun stumbled in like a bull in a china shop, smacking into the counter and giggling so loud he could have woken up the whole building. But that wasn't what Donghae noticed; what he noticed were the large marks on the younger man's neck, violet and yellow, already bruising. Donghae remembers thinking Changmin must've had a real set of chompers.
But then Kyuhyun is falling on him and the jealousy that he'd only relatively noticed as being existent was suddenly gone in a flash. Instead, taking its place was Kyuhyun's thick breath, the sent of alcohol lingering in the air between them and stinging Donghae's nose. And Kyuhyun's smile - those perfectly-straight pearls and the curve of his lips that makes Donghae's knees weak. That was there, too.
"Hyung," Kyuhyun breathed. "Let's make out."
And suddenly he could taste the alcohol in his mouth; Kyuhyun's tongue, soft and velvety, still dripping in the bittersweet liquid. The ticking started here, if Donghae can recall correctly, the constant questioning of Kyuhyun's (and his own) sanity, and just why things were the way they were.
The way they are, rather.
This version of Kyuhyun was not a constant. He was temporary, momentary. Brief. Only after a few too many drinks would he emerge from the depths and wreak havoc on Donghae's psyche.
Christmas Eve is a fiasco every year at the Super Junior dorms; weveryone is present, along with girlfriends and boyfriends and whoever friends. Heechul is drunk by six thirty, hanging on Hankyung as if he couldn't breathe unless it was from oxygen directly from Hankyung's lips. Siwon shows off his girlfriend, Eunhyuk sits a little too close to Donghae for his liking and Kyuhyun and Sungmin make out incessantly under the mistletoe. Donghae tried to pretend it didn't bother him, like he didn't even see the way Kyuhyun's hands slipped into the back of Sungmin's pants, cupping one cheek in each hand and squeezing. But he did see it, and oh, it bothered him more than he would ever admit.
Eunhyuk was the first one to notice there was something wrong with Donghae, naturally. Considering the two were once the Lee Brothers, inseparable; one was never found without the other.
"Donghae," Eunhyuk had said. The familiarity in his voice stung Donghae. "What is going on?"
"I'm fine," Donghae had replied. "Honestly, Hyukjae. I'm fine. Don't worry about me."
"I'm going to worry," Eunhyuk said softly, barely above a whisper. "You're my brother, practically. You've been different ever since...well, ever since he came into the picture."
"There is nothing going on between Kyuhyun and I," Donghae breathed; he tried to speak loud, confidently like normal. But he just couldn't muster the energy. It hurt to admit the lack of relationship between he and the maknae.
"Donghae," Eunhyuk said, in that tone of voice where he just knows.
That was all he needed to say before Donghae crumbled.
The two sat outside the local convenience store, clutching extra large slushies in their cold hands, like two teenagers after their final exams. January was finally upon them in full swing, the stinging emptiness that accompanies it in full force.
Eunhyuk took a sip of his cherry slush. "So how did it start?" He asked. Donghae looked to him. "You being in love with Kyuhyun or whatever."
Donghae paused, looked at his slush. Was he really that transparent? "I dunno," He said flatly, taking a sip. Blue raspberry. "It just sort of...happened."
"Nothing just happens," Eunhyuk said. "They happen because of some sort of event. So tell me, what was it?"
Donghae paused. He didn't remember; all he remembered was the multiple times he made out with Kyuhyun, unknown to Sungmin, who would have been devastated had he found out. "I don't know, honestly."
Eunhyuk sighed. "Are you going to tell him?"
"Never," Donghae replied.
Eunhyuk finished his slush and threw the empty cup on the ground. Lifted his foot and crushed it in one blow. "Why not?"
"He has Sungmin," was all Donghae said.
"He also has you," Eunhyuk said. "Obviously you have a chance if he's making out with you behind his boyfriend's back."
Donghae nodded.
"So do something about it," Eunhyuk said, grinning. That sort of grin where it almost hurt to look at.
Donghae nodded again.
It was raining that day. The third of March.
The third of March was the day Donghae finally mustered up the courage, finally grew a pair as Eunhyuk kept saying, over and over and over until Donghae finally snapped and whacked him hard over the head. It took a lot of preparation, a lot of thinking and analyzing and planning, but on the third of March, he was ready.
Kyuhyun pulled a small carton out of his pocket, with large red lettering and Donghae nearly died.
"You smoke?" He asked, his voice cracking. Kyuhyun raised an eyebrow and held out the carton; candy cigarettes. Oh.
"So what are we doing here, hyung?" Kyuhyun asked. "Kind of random, bringing me to Namsan when it's pouring out."
Donghae breathed in, and it was as if Kyuhyun was smoking three cigarettes at one time and blowing the smoke directly into Donghae's throat. Suffocating. "We need to talk."
"'Kay," Kyuhyun said simply, pulling a long candy stick out of the carton and snipping off the end. The crunch made Donghae shudder. "Shoot."
Donghae paused. That was it? There were no probing questions, no smartass remarks? He just gave Donghae the floor as if it were nothing. "I, um..." Donghae started, eyes averting to the ground. His face was burning so hot, he couldn't even look Kyuhyun in the face. "I love you."
Kyuhyun's breathing stopped momentarily, and Donghae nearly choked on his own tongue. He could handle rejection, he could handle harsh words. But Donghae could not handle silence.
"I know," Kyuhyun said.
"You...know," Donghae repeated. Kyuhyun nodded, took another bite of his candy.
"Yeah, how could I not?" He replied, a smirk tugging at his lips. "It's obvious, hyung. Even Sungmin knows it."
Donghae blinked. "So, why..." He started.
"Do I keep tormenting you?" Kyuhyun asked, tilting his head. Donghae nodded. "I dunno."
Donghae's brow furrowed. "You don't know?"
Kyuhyun shrugged. "I dunno, hyung. You're a good kisser. I like you. I dunno if I love you, but I like you."
"Well, if you're going to just like me, can you not?" Donghae asked. "I mean, you keep jerking me around like a fucking ragdoll. One second we're making out on the couch and the next you're hanging on Sungmin like he's your life support. You can't have us both, Kyuhyun."
The rain let up momentarily, the sky still littered with dark clouds but the onslaught of wetness finally ceasing. Donghae looked up for a second to see if the sun was going to come out; no dice.
Kyuhyun took the piece of candy out of his mouth and tossed it on the ground, crunching it with his shoe as if it were actually alight. Donghae furrowed his brow further.
He nearly fainted when Kyuhyun wrapped his arms around him and pulled him into a soft kiss.
"I'm sorry," Kyuhyun said as he pulled away. "That I've been fucking around with you like this."
Donghae raised an eyebrow. "What are you saying?"
Kyuhyun laughed, leaned forward and kissed Donghae's forehead. "Shut up, hyung."
That night, Sungmin spent the majority of his night crying, as did Donghae. The only difference being that Donghae was actually in good spirits.
a/n 2: i don't like this very much but whatever, i'm rusty. And make sure you check out my request's post!