(no subject)
Title: Scream
Fandom: Merlin
Characters/Pairing: Morgana
Word Count: 496
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Episode 5x06 spoilers
Summary: She should have been glad or at least satisfied, but she only felt an itch inside her heart that grew into an ache as the screams continued inside.
Author's Notes: Sets during episode 5x06
Scream
The screams behind the door started getting louder and more frequent, which meant that everything was working according to plan. Yet Morgana wasn’t as pleased as she wanted to be.
She wasn’t pleased at all.
What has gotten into me? - she wondered. After those years she had spent in the darkness, her time had come to strike Arthur where it hurt the most, yet she didn’t feel excited. Not even with the best plan she had ever made. Arthur would be lost by the hand of the one who he loved the most and she would finally get what should be hers by law: the throne of Camelot. She should have been glad, or at least satisfied, but she only felt an itch inside her heart that grew into an ache as the screams continued inside.
They reminded her of her own screams; not those she had made in the last two years, but the ones she had woken up with in Camelot after a nightmare. And she remembered Gwen’s arms around her as she had been gently stroking her back to calm her down, whispering into her ears that she was there and that it had been only a dream.
Then she remembered cold fingers brushing her hair and a firm voice telling her that everyone she loved would turn away if they knew what she had.
I am the only one you can trust, sister.
I am the only one you can trust, Gwen.
Suddenly she felt weak in the knees and she had to lean on the wall in order not to collapse. Discovering how similar had been her sister’s behavior to her own made the ache spread out in her soul, wrenching her heart. She was nothing but a puppet in Morgause’s hands and she had made her turn her back to everything and everyone she had loved and who had loved her. How was Morgause so sure they would have tried to kill her?, she asked herself, thinking of the old times when she, Arthur, Gwen and Merlin were still friends. Despite all the anger she felt towards them in the past few years, now she missed those times. Those times when she wasn’t alone.
“You didn’t even know them!” she heard her own voice; hoarse and weak, speaking to her sister, even though she would never hear it.
Lifting a hand to touch her face she found tears under her fingers - the tears of the good-hearted, caring Morgana who had got lost in the hurt and the hatred, but now was there, crouching on the floor, unable to believe what she had become.
Everything she had believed in had disappeared and she found nothing but bitterness, anger, desire for revenge and solitude. Like a burnt forest, she thought, looking around the dark corridor, feeling as lonely as she had never felt before.
She would have given everything to wake up from this nightmare.
But the screams went on.
Fandom: Merlin
Characters/Pairing: Morgana
Word Count: 496
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Episode 5x06 spoilers
Summary: She should have been glad or at least satisfied, but she only felt an itch inside her heart that grew into an ache as the screams continued inside.
Author's Notes: Sets during episode 5x06
Scream
The screams behind the door started getting louder and more frequent, which meant that everything was working according to plan. Yet Morgana wasn’t as pleased as she wanted to be.
She wasn’t pleased at all.
What has gotten into me? - she wondered. After those years she had spent in the darkness, her time had come to strike Arthur where it hurt the most, yet she didn’t feel excited. Not even with the best plan she had ever made. Arthur would be lost by the hand of the one who he loved the most and she would finally get what should be hers by law: the throne of Camelot. She should have been glad, or at least satisfied, but she only felt an itch inside her heart that grew into an ache as the screams continued inside.
They reminded her of her own screams; not those she had made in the last two years, but the ones she had woken up with in Camelot after a nightmare. And she remembered Gwen’s arms around her as she had been gently stroking her back to calm her down, whispering into her ears that she was there and that it had been only a dream.
Then she remembered cold fingers brushing her hair and a firm voice telling her that everyone she loved would turn away if they knew what she had.
I am the only one you can trust, sister.
I am the only one you can trust, Gwen.
Suddenly she felt weak in the knees and she had to lean on the wall in order not to collapse. Discovering how similar had been her sister’s behavior to her own made the ache spread out in her soul, wrenching her heart. She was nothing but a puppet in Morgause’s hands and she had made her turn her back to everything and everyone she had loved and who had loved her. How was Morgause so sure they would have tried to kill her?, she asked herself, thinking of the old times when she, Arthur, Gwen and Merlin were still friends. Despite all the anger she felt towards them in the past few years, now she missed those times. Those times when she wasn’t alone.
“You didn’t even know them!” she heard her own voice; hoarse and weak, speaking to her sister, even though she would never hear it.
Lifting a hand to touch her face she found tears under her fingers - the tears of the good-hearted, caring Morgana who had got lost in the hurt and the hatred, but now was there, crouching on the floor, unable to believe what she had become.
Everything she had believed in had disappeared and she found nothing but bitterness, anger, desire for revenge and solitude. Like a burnt forest, she thought, looking around the dark corridor, feeling as lonely as she had never felt before.
She would have given everything to wake up from this nightmare.
But the screams went on.