Andrew's Birth Story
The following is an account of Andrew's birth story. It is medically explicit and may not be suitable for view at work.
Our official due date was April 10, 2010. It came and went with much mourning since Andrew stubbornly stayed inside, warm and cozy. Our next OB/GYN visit was on April 14. After an exam, the Doc declared my cervix unripe and unfit for induction. He said if they tried, I would likely end up as a c-section, which he knew I wanted to avoid at all costs. Our NEXT visit was April 21. I was dilated to 1-2 cm and 25% effaced. Yay! The doctor's policy was to not let women go past 2 weeks overdue and by then I was more then ready to get this all over with. Our doctor scheduled us for induction the next day.
We arrived at the hospital at 7am as instructed, and were admitted. The rooms were quite spacious, which was nice. I took chocolates and donut holes for the nurses, hoping to get them on "my" side from the start. The first nurse came in to start my IV and I politely requested a cervical ripening agent before they started the pitocin, since I knew my Bishop score was quite low. The nurse said she'd check with the doctor. A little while later, a resident came in and explained that because I was a VBAC, they could not use a cervical ripening agent, and that in fact it was counter-indicated for VBACs. I explained I had done quite extensive research and was prepared to accept the minimal risks of the medicine in order to decrease my chances of needing a c-section later. She said she had to check with her boss, and left. The head of Residents came in, and went through the whole spiel again, this time including the "dead baby" speech... the one designed to scare you into doing what they want. Once again, I explained that I understood the risks (minimal according to my research, including medical journal writeups), and was prepared to sign whatever needed signing to waive my rights to sue the hospital and get on with it. The doctor left, and came back with the American College of Gynecology study (2001) in which the risks are cited, and said he could not give me the meds because of the risks in this study and the fact that the meds are "black boxed" for VBAC (meaning they are absolutely counter-indicated). I asked to speak with my own doctor, who was supposed to be in the hospital for my whole labor anyway, and was told he wasn't there yet. I politely said I would wait, and so we did. Meanwhile, they had been monitoring my blood pressure. It had started a little high that day, and began to slowly climb.
My doctor finally arrived. I went through the whole speech again, and he politely but firmly refused to give me the medicine I wanted. It was pretty much a stand-off at that point. I could either get on with it using just the Pitocin, or leave the hospital and hope I went into labor on my own sometime in the next decade. I caved, and the nurse started the Pitocin at 10:30am.
Contractions started pretty much right away, and were 2-5 minutes apart from the start. They were light at first but quickly intensified since they up the dose of Pitocin every 20 minutes until contractions are evenly spaced and "sufficiently strong." It was mandatory for me to be attached to a fetal monitor, but I could move around as far as the cords would let me, including using a birthing ball, which I did. My water broke on its own at 11:45am, and was a rather surprising feeling. I moved to the bed to use the squat bar. The nurse kept coming in to adjust the monitor because Andrew kept moving away from it. His back had been along my right side and he rotated so that it was on the left, but he also just kept squirming around in general, to the annoyance of the monitor.
Sometime shortly later, the first resident came in and said they needed to put in an internal monitor because they were having a hard time keeping track of Andrew's heart rate. I should have said no, but I didn't. My contractions at that point were still pretty bearable, probably a 4 or 5 on a scale of 10. The resident said I was at at a solid 2, and 100% effaced. She then proceeded to try and force the internal monitor by holding open my cervix during contractions, creating the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I finally pleaded with her to stop. She did, and her glove was covered with blood. She left and Stephen comforted me until I calmed down and could get back to work. My nurse came and asked if I wanted an epidural. I did not, but I asked if there were other meds available. She gave me something in my IV that I can't remember the name of, and it did take the edge off.
A student nurse came in and asked if I would like a massage. She filled a hallow rolling pin with hot water and gave me the most wonderful lower back massage. We actually had a very pleasant conversation through several more contractions.
Around 3pm, interrupting the massage, the head resident came in and said they really really needed to get that fetal monitor in place, along with another monitor that would measure the strength of my contractions so they could make sure everything was going as needed. Once again, I should have said no, but I did not. He said I was at 4cm, 100% (progress!) and then put in the monitor. I thought the first try was bad, but this was worse. I will not make light of it, I screamed. He was very harsh with me and told me it would be easier on me if I would just relax. He pretty much blamed me for the pain. He finally got the monitor attached, and then I really did cry, for a long time. As a parting shot, the jerk asked if I was ready to consider an epidural yet. The nurse came in a few minutes later to see what I wanted to do, and I took the epidural. They also had to start magnesium in my IV because my blood pressure was now in the danger zone and was still steadily climbing. I feel those two things were the final dominoes falling.
The anesthesiologist came and started the epidural, and while I could still move my legs, I could not feel the contractions at all. I was unable to get up from that point on, and I did not dilate further. I went back down to 90% effaced. At 6pm, my doctor came back in and said that after 3 hours of no progress, we needed to consider the c-section. Stephen and I discussed it and felt that it was unlikely we were going to be "allowed" to go much further despite what we wanted, and considering the series of medical interventions that had been pushed on us so far, we felt it was unlikely that even if we refused all further treatment, that we would get our VBAC anyway. We agreed to the c-section, and the hustle to get things going started. Stephen went to get a fast dinner since we knew the night would be long, and the team began to prep me for surgery.
The anesthesiologist came back and increased the epidural. The nurse gave me some sort of citrus shot that was supposed to reduce the acid in my stomach and decrease the chance of vomiting. It actually made me quite sick, and possibly combined with the increased anesthesia, I became quite sick to my stomach. Things got the rush put on. I heard the anesthesiologist say he was very concerned about the vomiting and Stephen was quickly dressed to go. We were wheeled away into the O.R. and the procedure started around 7pm.
Andrew Michael James was born at 7:26pm. He weighed 8lbs 14oz, and measured 21inches long. He had a healthy cry and a full head of hair! Stephen held him so that I could reach over and touch his head before they made him leave so they could sew me up. It took a really long time... much longer then I remember the last one taking. Maybe because of the amount of scar tissue from last time? I don't know. We were released from the hospital at 7:30pm on 4/24 at my insistence that I needed to go home so I could rest better, and since there were no complications they let me go.
In general, I feel I was "handled" pretty much per hospital policy, and that I had pretty much no chance of a successful VBAC under those guidelines. I have a lingering sense of self-blame for accepting the epidural. Maybe if I hadn't, I would have continued to progress despite the Magnesium. Now, it seems pretty unlikely that I will ever have a child naturally, post-(2x) c-sections. What I do feel good about is the progress I was able to make, and that despite the fact that no one enjoys a contraction, I was able to live some of the experience.
Our official due date was April 10, 2010. It came and went with much mourning since Andrew stubbornly stayed inside, warm and cozy. Our next OB/GYN visit was on April 14. After an exam, the Doc declared my cervix unripe and unfit for induction. He said if they tried, I would likely end up as a c-section, which he knew I wanted to avoid at all costs. Our NEXT visit was April 21. I was dilated to 1-2 cm and 25% effaced. Yay! The doctor's policy was to not let women go past 2 weeks overdue and by then I was more then ready to get this all over with. Our doctor scheduled us for induction the next day.
We arrived at the hospital at 7am as instructed, and were admitted. The rooms were quite spacious, which was nice. I took chocolates and donut holes for the nurses, hoping to get them on "my" side from the start. The first nurse came in to start my IV and I politely requested a cervical ripening agent before they started the pitocin, since I knew my Bishop score was quite low. The nurse said she'd check with the doctor. A little while later, a resident came in and explained that because I was a VBAC, they could not use a cervical ripening agent, and that in fact it was counter-indicated for VBACs. I explained I had done quite extensive research and was prepared to accept the minimal risks of the medicine in order to decrease my chances of needing a c-section later. She said she had to check with her boss, and left. The head of Residents came in, and went through the whole spiel again, this time including the "dead baby" speech... the one designed to scare you into doing what they want. Once again, I explained that I understood the risks (minimal according to my research, including medical journal writeups), and was prepared to sign whatever needed signing to waive my rights to sue the hospital and get on with it. The doctor left, and came back with the American College of Gynecology study (2001) in which the risks are cited, and said he could not give me the meds because of the risks in this study and the fact that the meds are "black boxed" for VBAC (meaning they are absolutely counter-indicated). I asked to speak with my own doctor, who was supposed to be in the hospital for my whole labor anyway, and was told he wasn't there yet. I politely said I would wait, and so we did. Meanwhile, they had been monitoring my blood pressure. It had started a little high that day, and began to slowly climb.
My doctor finally arrived. I went through the whole speech again, and he politely but firmly refused to give me the medicine I wanted. It was pretty much a stand-off at that point. I could either get on with it using just the Pitocin, or leave the hospital and hope I went into labor on my own sometime in the next decade. I caved, and the nurse started the Pitocin at 10:30am.
Contractions started pretty much right away, and were 2-5 minutes apart from the start. They were light at first but quickly intensified since they up the dose of Pitocin every 20 minutes until contractions are evenly spaced and "sufficiently strong." It was mandatory for me to be attached to a fetal monitor, but I could move around as far as the cords would let me, including using a birthing ball, which I did. My water broke on its own at 11:45am, and was a rather surprising feeling. I moved to the bed to use the squat bar. The nurse kept coming in to adjust the monitor because Andrew kept moving away from it. His back had been along my right side and he rotated so that it was on the left, but he also just kept squirming around in general, to the annoyance of the monitor.
Sometime shortly later, the first resident came in and said they needed to put in an internal monitor because they were having a hard time keeping track of Andrew's heart rate. I should have said no, but I didn't. My contractions at that point were still pretty bearable, probably a 4 or 5 on a scale of 10. The resident said I was at at a solid 2, and 100% effaced. She then proceeded to try and force the internal monitor by holding open my cervix during contractions, creating the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I finally pleaded with her to stop. She did, and her glove was covered with blood. She left and Stephen comforted me until I calmed down and could get back to work. My nurse came and asked if I wanted an epidural. I did not, but I asked if there were other meds available. She gave me something in my IV that I can't remember the name of, and it did take the edge off.
A student nurse came in and asked if I would like a massage. She filled a hallow rolling pin with hot water and gave me the most wonderful lower back massage. We actually had a very pleasant conversation through several more contractions.
Around 3pm, interrupting the massage, the head resident came in and said they really really needed to get that fetal monitor in place, along with another monitor that would measure the strength of my contractions so they could make sure everything was going as needed. Once again, I should have said no, but I did not. He said I was at 4cm, 100% (progress!) and then put in the monitor. I thought the first try was bad, but this was worse. I will not make light of it, I screamed. He was very harsh with me and told me it would be easier on me if I would just relax. He pretty much blamed me for the pain. He finally got the monitor attached, and then I really did cry, for a long time. As a parting shot, the jerk asked if I was ready to consider an epidural yet. The nurse came in a few minutes later to see what I wanted to do, and I took the epidural. They also had to start magnesium in my IV because my blood pressure was now in the danger zone and was still steadily climbing. I feel those two things were the final dominoes falling.
The anesthesiologist came and started the epidural, and while I could still move my legs, I could not feel the contractions at all. I was unable to get up from that point on, and I did not dilate further. I went back down to 90% effaced. At 6pm, my doctor came back in and said that after 3 hours of no progress, we needed to consider the c-section. Stephen and I discussed it and felt that it was unlikely we were going to be "allowed" to go much further despite what we wanted, and considering the series of medical interventions that had been pushed on us so far, we felt it was unlikely that even if we refused all further treatment, that we would get our VBAC anyway. We agreed to the c-section, and the hustle to get things going started. Stephen went to get a fast dinner since we knew the night would be long, and the team began to prep me for surgery.
The anesthesiologist came back and increased the epidural. The nurse gave me some sort of citrus shot that was supposed to reduce the acid in my stomach and decrease the chance of vomiting. It actually made me quite sick, and possibly combined with the increased anesthesia, I became quite sick to my stomach. Things got the rush put on. I heard the anesthesiologist say he was very concerned about the vomiting and Stephen was quickly dressed to go. We were wheeled away into the O.R. and the procedure started around 7pm.
Andrew Michael James was born at 7:26pm. He weighed 8lbs 14oz, and measured 21inches long. He had a healthy cry and a full head of hair! Stephen held him so that I could reach over and touch his head before they made him leave so they could sew me up. It took a really long time... much longer then I remember the last one taking. Maybe because of the amount of scar tissue from last time? I don't know. We were released from the hospital at 7:30pm on 4/24 at my insistence that I needed to go home so I could rest better, and since there were no complications they let me go.
In general, I feel I was "handled" pretty much per hospital policy, and that I had pretty much no chance of a successful VBAC under those guidelines. I have a lingering sense of self-blame for accepting the epidural. Maybe if I hadn't, I would have continued to progress despite the Magnesium. Now, it seems pretty unlikely that I will ever have a child naturally, post-(2x) c-sections. What I do feel good about is the progress I was able to make, and that despite the fact that no one enjoys a contraction, I was able to live some of the experience.