(no subject)
I need a second surgery.
I can't believe this is happening. I just can't.
I don't know what I've done so wrong in this life or a previous one but God please stop.
I've been diagnosed with STUMP, a very rare kind of tumor. There isn't much information about it (worldwide) and my case was recently presented in a medical congress.
Believe it or not, the cards said exactly what my surgeon said yesterday; that what's happening to me is a big enigma to them.
I haven't been to work in almost two months.
Since December, I've lost track of time. I sleep when I can. I'm totally disoriented when I wake up. I'm not sure if it's Monday or Saturday, if I need to go to work or if I need to get some blood tests done that day... Most of the times it's dark when I open my eyes and I don't know if it's dusk or dawn.
I didn't have a proper X-mas or a happy New Year. I didn't have vacations and I'm completely worn out.
They say God gives his toughest battles to His strongest soldiers. But there is an exception to every rule and I most definitely am that exception.
It took me a fucking month to walk again!
Monday is going to be hell with tests and they want to schedule my surgery for next Thursday.
I still want to be strong but I wonder if this is my time. I wonder if this is worth fighting for. If anyone will miss me if I'm gone.
TBH, I don't want to find out the answers to those questions.
I will eat a cheeseburger with fries today; I haven't done that in months. And I will go to the movies.
God knows if and when I'll be able to that again.
If I had one wish.... I want to be healthy again. I really don't want to miss my beloved Autumn.
I can't believe this is happening. I just can't.
I don't know what I've done so wrong in this life or a previous one but God please stop.
I've been diagnosed with STUMP, a very rare kind of tumor. There isn't much information about it (worldwide) and my case was recently presented in a medical congress.
Believe it or not, the cards said exactly what my surgeon said yesterday; that what's happening to me is a big enigma to them.
I haven't been to work in almost two months.
Since December, I've lost track of time. I sleep when I can. I'm totally disoriented when I wake up. I'm not sure if it's Monday or Saturday, if I need to go to work or if I need to get some blood tests done that day... Most of the times it's dark when I open my eyes and I don't know if it's dusk or dawn.
I didn't have a proper X-mas or a happy New Year. I didn't have vacations and I'm completely worn out.
They say God gives his toughest battles to His strongest soldiers. But there is an exception to every rule and I most definitely am that exception.
It took me a fucking month to walk again!
Monday is going to be hell with tests and they want to schedule my surgery for next Thursday.
I still want to be strong but I wonder if this is my time. I wonder if this is worth fighting for. If anyone will miss me if I'm gone.
TBH, I don't want to find out the answers to those questions.
I will eat a cheeseburger with fries today; I haven't done that in months. And I will go to the movies.
God knows if and when I'll be able to that again.
If I had one wish.... I want to be healthy again. I really don't want to miss my beloved Autumn.