Hallelujah: Chapter 7
Remember when I moved in you,
And the holy dove was moving too,
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
I wonder what I should give s a gift to you and Potter for the precious child you are bearing. I should have seen this invitation coming, as you are due to give birth within the month, and you are hardly the type to let this occaision pass with no party.
Do you remember when you came to tell me your joyous news? You apparated right into my living room, with Potter hot on your heels, scolding you for apparating "in your condition".
You were both glowing. Potter looked warm, content and happy... And you...
Motherhood will suit you well. A half dozen children clamouring for your attention... A fond husband nuzzling your neck just so, so that you cannot give any of the children what they seek. You swatting said husband to the delighted squeals of your cheerful bairns.
How I wish it would be stawberry blond children squealing as you swatted me away. Instead, it will be Potter's children.
I have often wondered what would have happened if you had not done the contraceptive charm right that night. Would you have left Potter for me? Or would Potter have ended up raising my child as his? What would our kids have looked like, a cross between steely grey eyes and honey brown ones... A flaming red crossed with white.
These things I wonder, and in the moments when I can remove myself from the reverie I succumb to, I ponder the perfect gift.
For it must be perfect. There is nothing else for it, because you deserve perfection.
The cost of it won't matter to you and Potter, nor to the little one. All that will matter is that it comes from me. I know this, and that makes the hunt all the more difficult.
What would it have been like for David if Bathsheba's husband had gone back to her that night, laying with her? Would David's story have then been a lot more like mine, where, instead of having his first child with her die, and her son Solomon become the wisest man ever known.... He would merely have pined away, looking at her and her husband with a fervent wish that he had had her all to himself? I believe it would have been so. It is hard enough for me to know that you are with another man, and you aren't even bearing my child. How much worse would it be if you were pregnant with my child?
How would it affect me? How would it affect us? How would Potter handle it? I find myself wondering exactly what he would think, more and more these days. I wonder if it is a sign of insanity or merely maturity? Or perhaps, it is that I respect him. Potter is much more akin to David than I. He has killed the Goliath of our times, and has found himself after the world's heart, not to mention God's.
All my ponderings on David have helped me decide what to get for your little one. I must leave immediately to ensure everything will be in order in time for your party.
Until tomorrow, my love.
As I head out, my heart is light with the joy of knowing I have the perfect gift in mind... And I find myself singing aloud...
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelu...jah.