Comments | nebulababy: (без темы)

nebulababy

(Untitled)

Mar 02, 2008 01:06

i actually want to keep discussing race but i need to give an update on two things
FIRST and worst: klaas is in love with me.
GREAT. fucking GREAT. can this just, STOP HAPPENING?? i really am so pissed off at myself. you know what's even worse okay he drove me to delft, which was really nice and then like pretty much demanded a kiss so i gave a ( Read more... )

Comments 4

mouthwater March 2 2008, 09:33:08 UTC

dear kerstin,
dont worry, this feeling is just the your concious kicking in to reality check the situation, it doesnt make you whore-like at all, the guilt shit is hard to deal with (just last week i was holding that fucking loser-in-love-with0me's hand ugh) just remember

YOU DONT OWE THEM ANYTHING
everything offered is their choice. and if they're offering it with expectations they are a manipulitive loser who doesn't deserve to be "payed back"
i'm startin to think its better to completely avoid these people, since i find it near impossible to reject what they are asking for. sure holdig someones hand or a hug or a kiss on the cheek is small, but ANYTHING, when you are roped is playing into their game, giving them the power. UGH the FUCKEr
dont accept the guilt trip!!!

nebulababy March 2 2008, 10:47:01 UTC

okay.
yeah, they're really low. i agree with you, it's kind of like a game and i know how small it was but i think that's a sign of weakness on my part and i can't let that weakness give way to anything bigger.
okay i'm feeling better about this today because i was talking to myself about it last night and i think that he's the one who should feel this way. i mean, you just don't do that, i think it was taking advantage of the situation. shittt

lilu_rockette March 2 2008, 09:56:10 UTC

oh hun, you honestly don't have shit to feel bad about. it's really one of those things that is only so bad cause you keeping thinking about it over and over and over again ( ... )

nebulababy March 2 2008, 10:54:21 UTC

no what makes it even worse is i would slip into my ignore-him-completely mode, which is wrong and assholish etc..ANYWAY but i feel like maybe miss. pamela also had this sort of situation with captain fuck or rodney because this guy is like...at the top of the music scene in south holland. yeah i fell in with the guy with all the connections. he brings bands from england and books them here and knows everyone, the show we went to--they were using HIS pa. i don't know, i'm SURE he's talking himself up a little bit but ung you know ( ... )