Love with Caution
Love with Caution
Lay/Sehun, Sehun/Luhan, onesided!lay/suho; Angst; G; -3,000
Yixing is going to get his feelings for the boy who works at the convenience store off his chest. Things don't go quite as he planned.
A/N: somewhat inspired by personal experiences :/ Thanks to kodeetrent for helping me actually finish this. (kind of)
7:56 AM
The crisp fall air hits Yixing’s lungs as soon as he steps foot out the front door. He slowly draws in a deep breath relishing the cool, refreshing air as it fills his lungs. Fall is Yixing’s favorite season. Not many people know that about him, matter of fact, Yixing doesn’t think anyone knows that about him. People don’t care to learn the small details most of the time. Yixing stands on his front porch taking in the beauty he is surrounded by. Just yesterday it seemed to still be summer but overnight the world transformed into something new yet familiar. All the feelings of the upcoming holidays seems to swirl and swell in the air. It's a feeling Yixing wishes would stay with him all year round.
Yixing glances down at his watch coming back to the present. He curses under his breath when he sees what time it is. He’s a little too early. Even if he leaves now he will be much too early, the story doesn't open till 8:30. He doesn’t want to blow everything he has been building up for the past two weeks by acting like a stalker now. He needs to keep his cool and show up at the same time he does every day. He sighs as he turns around and goes back inside his home. As he steps back inside out of the fresh air Yixing wonders why he does this to himself every day of the week.
8:32 AM
Yixing steps out his front door and this time as he takes a deep breath of the cool air he also takes a step down onto the walkway. He starts walking confidently towards his destination this time unlike the last. He is going to see him and today is the day he is going to confess everything. Maybe.
By him, Yixing is referring to the boy who goes by the name of Sehun. Sehun happens to work at the local convenience store and that's where Yixing fist laid eyes on him. Yixing had always gone to get himself coffee and snack there before going to work every day, it was his daily routine. It wasn't until last week that everything changed. They hired a new employee by the name of Sehun. As soon as Yixing had laid eyes on him he knew, he knew that he would inevitably fall for the man behind the register and fall hard.
Yixing shakes himself out of the first day he met Sehun as he walks with purpose down his street. He takes a turn and heads in the direction of the convenience store. Hopefully this day will turn out exactly as he had planned. He actually couldn’t sleep last night anticipation getting the best of him and not letting him think of anything else but what he was going to do today.
A vibration against his leg from his pocket pulls him one again back into his body and out of his thoughts. He pulls the phone out of his pocket pressing the answer button and shoving the phone against his ear. “Joonmyun I can’t talk right now.”
Yixing hears Joonmyun sigh audibly on the other end of the line. “Yixing don’t do this. It’s creepy.”
Yixing scoffs loudly into the receiver of his phone. “It’s not creepy Joonmyun how else do you meet people?”
“I just think you should start by saying something like ‘Hi, My name is Yixing."
Yixing stops walking as the store comes into view ahead of him. “Joonmyun I don’t have time for this. If I don’t do this now I don’t think that I ever will.”
“Yixing, that’s exactly why I’m calling you. I just think you need to reconsider some things before you do this. What if you make a fool out of yourself? I'm sorry but I find this whole thing weird. I mean have you even said anything of substance to him? Please Yixing, I have to tell you something important before you do this. I-“
Yixing cuts Joonmyun off. “I see the store now. I’ll call you later.” He presses the end button and hurriedly shoves the phone back into his pocket. With a deep breath Yixing advances to the store without any hesitation.
8:56 AM
Yixing enters the store and lets the warm air and the scent of freshly made coffee fill his lungs to the brim. His eyes automatically shoot to the register looking for the one he came here to speak to. Yixing advances into the store and heads to the coffee pots trying to act natural. He does what he does every other morning he has come into the store. He grabs a Styrofoam cup, pours himself some coffee, adds just a touch of cream then grabs a snack for later as he heads to the register to pay.
“Hello.” A cheery voice comes from behind him as he moves behind the register. Yixing looks over his shoulder to see Sehun walking past and behind him to the other side of the register. “Just the usual?” He asks happily as he scans the items Yixing placed on the counter.
“Actually…” Yixing can feel himself shaking. “I was wondering, well…”
The boy behind the counter chuckles. “What? Here to confess your undying love to me?” He grins widely and Yixing feels a shift as his whole world is thrown into unknown and strange new territory.
Before Yixing can quickly deny Sehun's Claim the chime on the door rings. A slightly short young male walks inside like he owns the place. His curly brown hair bounces as he moves with purpose towards the register. Sehun looks up in surprise, his eyes slightly widened as he watches the man come toward him. “Luhan what are you doing here?" Sehun asks.
Yixing watches as this Luhan person walks past him and goes around to the other side of the register. He doesn’t say anything, just focuses all his attention right on Sehun like nothing else matters. Something burns hot in the pit of Yixing’s stomach. Luhan stops a foot away from the boy. “Sehun.” He says softly. Yixing hates the way he says it.
“I can’t do this anymore. I can't pretend like we are nothing. I can't go on without having you completely.” In the blink of an eye he pulls Sehun towards him, their mouths meld together, their bodies fit together like they were made for each other. It takes everything inside Yixing to turn away and not act as though jealousy is eating him from the inside out. It feels like someone has ripped his heart out right before his eyes. It's burning pain similar to how it would feel to be tossed a river of lava.
Something snaps inside his chest. “Uh hello.” He says emotionless. “Can I pay for my stuff and get out of here, I really don’t want to watch you two make out.” He says trying to hide the scorn in his voice.
Sehun pushes Luhan away and flushes a dark red. If Yixing wasn’t so heartbroken he would have thought it was cute. Not now though. Not when it feels as if his heart has been ripped right from his chest.
“I’m sorry. Your total is 3:15.” Sehun says slightly out of breath. He wipes his lips with the back of his hand sending another spike of jealousy through Yixing. Luhan is standing a little ways behind him with a smirk plastered to his face. Yixing knows it’s unfair to hate him without even knowing him but he does, he hates him so much.
Yixing hands Sehun the money making sure their hands don’t even brush a little. He would have normally purposely touched him to try and get something out of it but not today. He's not in the mood to play silly little games.
As soon as Sehun hands Yixing his change he spins on his heels and heads towards the exit suddenly needing to take a deep lungful of fresh air. He really just needs to get as far away from Sehun and this store as he can.
“Have a nice day!” Sehun says cheerily just as Yixing walks out the front door. Yixing will not be having a nice day.
He manages to hold everything in until he gets a good distance away from the store but he can’t hold it in forever. Eventually the tears come hot and heavy making his whole face bloated and gross. How can simply liking someone hurt so much? He sits down on a secluded bench in the mostly empty park. He’s just glad he decided to go early in the morning and not wait until later tonight when he would have surely made a huge fool out of himself.
He cries himself out on that park bench. He even calls into work to say he needs to take the day off, take a day to clear his mind and figure out why this is hurting him so much. He doesn’t really tell his manager that but he’s pretty sure that Wufan can tell that he is emotional over something. Wufan may be his boss but they were pretty good friends after work hours. "If you need another day that's fine also. I don't know what happened but you sound really upset."
Yixing sniffles into the phone. "I should be fine by tomorrow." he ends the call and slides his phone back into his pocket just as he's assaulted with another round of tears and pain.
10:04 AM
Yixing answers his phone immediately, needing to hear his friend’s voice. Joonmyun has always been there when things got tough and Yixing needs him now more than he ever has before.
“You were right.” Yixing almost sobs into the phone when he answers.
Joonmyun makes a sound on the other end. "I'm sorry Yixing. I told you not to do it. Do you want to come over? We can watch comedies, order pizza and get you through this minor bump."
Yixing is so grateful he has someone like Joonmyun as his friend. "Can you pick me up?"
12:04
Stuffed with pizza, lying haphazardly across Joonmyun's floor Sehun feels slightly better. The whoel situation this morning is almost completely forgotten. Just a small twinge of pain comes to Yixing whenever he thinks about Sehun, not as bad as before but just enough to remind him how stupid he is.
“What happened?” Joonmyun asks as the end credits to the movie they just finished move down the screen.
Yixing knew this question was inevitable. Joonmyun is his best friend of course he would want to know what could have upset Yixing so much. Yixing sighs and sits up. He scoots towards the couch until his back is resting against it. Joonmyun’s legs are to the right of him hanging over the edge of the couch. Yixing focuses his eyes on the empty pizza box lying a few feet away from him. He runs a hand through his hair, takes a deep breath and begins to speak.
12:32
“You were that close?” are the first words out of Joonmyun’s mouth. “You were really going to tell him right as some other guy walked in? Wow Yixing, I thought I had it bad but that’s just…wow.”
“I’m such and idiot.” Yixing drops his head into his hands. “If I just did it when I first met him, maybe asked him to hang out or something I wouldn’t be here right now, dying inside feeling completely stupid.”
Joonmyun chuckles lightly. “Yes you would. I bet that he has known that Luhan person for a while. I mean I could be wrong but it seems Luhan staked his claim a while ago.” Joonmyun shrugs. “Sorry Yixing but it’s not like you loved him, you’ll get through this easily.”
Yixing latches onto Joonmyun’s words. He hopes to god that Joonmyun is right.
Joonmyun moves to the edge of the couch and then drops to the floor next to Yixing. His eyes lock with Yixing’s. The air between them suddenly seems to tense from what Yixing isn’t sure.
Joonmyun focuses onto Yixing with serious eyes. “Yixing.”
Yixing swallows hard not liking the new mood in the room. “What’s wrong with you?” he asks trying to sound playful.
“I need to confess something to you before you pull another stunt like this.” Joonmyun takes in a deep breath seeming to suck all the oxygen out of the air and into his lungs. He stares at Yixing unblinkingly sending a shiver up Yixing’s spine. “I love you.”
Yixing is speechless. He has no idea what to say to Joonmyun. He didn’t see this coming, he had no idea that Joonmyun even felt anything romantic for him in any way at all. How could Joonmyun have hidden his feeling for so long? But then again how long has even had these feelings? Yixing has been friends with Joonmyun for the past ten years. Has he felt something for him the whole time or is it new?
“I’m sorry.” Joonmyun mumbles after a long thick silence.
Yixing shakes his head. “You have nothing to be sorry about. I just didn’t have any idea.”
Joonmyun looks down at his twisted up hands sitting in his lap. “Do you feel anything for me at all?”
Yixing is suddenly on his feet. “I am so sorry Joonmyun. I don’t think of you in that way, not even a little bit. You’re my best friend. I have never thought of you as something more and I never will.” He doesn’t mean to sound so harsh but if he softens it Joonmyun might still think it’s a possibility for him to have feeling back when it’s not a possibility. He doesn’t want to breed false hope in someone he cares about, doesn’t want to cause more pain than what’s necessary.
“I understand.” Joonmyun wipes a stray tear from his cheek. “I think you should go now Yixing. We both need time to think about things.”
Yixing stares down at his friend. “I really am sorry.” He turns and slowly leaves his friend’s apartment without another word. There isn’t anything left to be said.
3:45
Everything has changes in the span of less than twelve hours. Yixing had a slight heartbreak and all his hope diminished and then dealt the same feelings out to his best friend.
Yixing sits down on his couch, puts his feet up on the table in front of him. His foot accidently knocks into an old Styrofoam cup from the day before. It falls over its bottom facing Yixing. That’s when he sees it. Numbers are scribbled onto the bottom of the cup. Yixing puts his feet back on the carpet and grabs the cup.
He wants to throw it across the ocean. Underneath the number, a phone number to be exact, is a name with a small smiley face drawn next to it. Underneath the name it has a small amount of writing that reads ‘Call me’
This whole time Sehun had noticed Yixing. Yixing wonders how many times Sehun has written his number on the bottom of his cups when he wasn’t paying attention.
Yixing feels like an idiot once again but just underneath that he feels his hope bloom anew.
to be continued......
Lay/Sehun, Sehun/Luhan, onesided!lay/suho; Angst; G; -3,000
Yixing is going to get his feelings for the boy who works at the convenience store off his chest. Things don't go quite as he planned.
A/N: somewhat inspired by personal experiences :/ Thanks to kodeetrent for helping me actually finish this. (kind of)
7:56 AM
The crisp fall air hits Yixing’s lungs as soon as he steps foot out the front door. He slowly draws in a deep breath relishing the cool, refreshing air as it fills his lungs. Fall is Yixing’s favorite season. Not many people know that about him, matter of fact, Yixing doesn’t think anyone knows that about him. People don’t care to learn the small details most of the time. Yixing stands on his front porch taking in the beauty he is surrounded by. Just yesterday it seemed to still be summer but overnight the world transformed into something new yet familiar. All the feelings of the upcoming holidays seems to swirl and swell in the air. It's a feeling Yixing wishes would stay with him all year round.
Yixing glances down at his watch coming back to the present. He curses under his breath when he sees what time it is. He’s a little too early. Even if he leaves now he will be much too early, the story doesn't open till 8:30. He doesn’t want to blow everything he has been building up for the past two weeks by acting like a stalker now. He needs to keep his cool and show up at the same time he does every day. He sighs as he turns around and goes back inside his home. As he steps back inside out of the fresh air Yixing wonders why he does this to himself every day of the week.
8:32 AM
Yixing steps out his front door and this time as he takes a deep breath of the cool air he also takes a step down onto the walkway. He starts walking confidently towards his destination this time unlike the last. He is going to see him and today is the day he is going to confess everything. Maybe.
By him, Yixing is referring to the boy who goes by the name of Sehun. Sehun happens to work at the local convenience store and that's where Yixing fist laid eyes on him. Yixing had always gone to get himself coffee and snack there before going to work every day, it was his daily routine. It wasn't until last week that everything changed. They hired a new employee by the name of Sehun. As soon as Yixing had laid eyes on him he knew, he knew that he would inevitably fall for the man behind the register and fall hard.
Yixing shakes himself out of the first day he met Sehun as he walks with purpose down his street. He takes a turn and heads in the direction of the convenience store. Hopefully this day will turn out exactly as he had planned. He actually couldn’t sleep last night anticipation getting the best of him and not letting him think of anything else but what he was going to do today.
A vibration against his leg from his pocket pulls him one again back into his body and out of his thoughts. He pulls the phone out of his pocket pressing the answer button and shoving the phone against his ear. “Joonmyun I can’t talk right now.”
Yixing hears Joonmyun sigh audibly on the other end of the line. “Yixing don’t do this. It’s creepy.”
Yixing scoffs loudly into the receiver of his phone. “It’s not creepy Joonmyun how else do you meet people?”
“I just think you should start by saying something like ‘Hi, My name is Yixing."
Yixing stops walking as the store comes into view ahead of him. “Joonmyun I don’t have time for this. If I don’t do this now I don’t think that I ever will.”
“Yixing, that’s exactly why I’m calling you. I just think you need to reconsider some things before you do this. What if you make a fool out of yourself? I'm sorry but I find this whole thing weird. I mean have you even said anything of substance to him? Please Yixing, I have to tell you something important before you do this. I-“
Yixing cuts Joonmyun off. “I see the store now. I’ll call you later.” He presses the end button and hurriedly shoves the phone back into his pocket. With a deep breath Yixing advances to the store without any hesitation.
8:56 AM
Yixing enters the store and lets the warm air and the scent of freshly made coffee fill his lungs to the brim. His eyes automatically shoot to the register looking for the one he came here to speak to. Yixing advances into the store and heads to the coffee pots trying to act natural. He does what he does every other morning he has come into the store. He grabs a Styrofoam cup, pours himself some coffee, adds just a touch of cream then grabs a snack for later as he heads to the register to pay.
“Hello.” A cheery voice comes from behind him as he moves behind the register. Yixing looks over his shoulder to see Sehun walking past and behind him to the other side of the register. “Just the usual?” He asks happily as he scans the items Yixing placed on the counter.
“Actually…” Yixing can feel himself shaking. “I was wondering, well…”
The boy behind the counter chuckles. “What? Here to confess your undying love to me?” He grins widely and Yixing feels a shift as his whole world is thrown into unknown and strange new territory.
Before Yixing can quickly deny Sehun's Claim the chime on the door rings. A slightly short young male walks inside like he owns the place. His curly brown hair bounces as he moves with purpose towards the register. Sehun looks up in surprise, his eyes slightly widened as he watches the man come toward him. “Luhan what are you doing here?" Sehun asks.
Yixing watches as this Luhan person walks past him and goes around to the other side of the register. He doesn’t say anything, just focuses all his attention right on Sehun like nothing else matters. Something burns hot in the pit of Yixing’s stomach. Luhan stops a foot away from the boy. “Sehun.” He says softly. Yixing hates the way he says it.
“I can’t do this anymore. I can't pretend like we are nothing. I can't go on without having you completely.” In the blink of an eye he pulls Sehun towards him, their mouths meld together, their bodies fit together like they were made for each other. It takes everything inside Yixing to turn away and not act as though jealousy is eating him from the inside out. It feels like someone has ripped his heart out right before his eyes. It's burning pain similar to how it would feel to be tossed a river of lava.
Something snaps inside his chest. “Uh hello.” He says emotionless. “Can I pay for my stuff and get out of here, I really don’t want to watch you two make out.” He says trying to hide the scorn in his voice.
Sehun pushes Luhan away and flushes a dark red. If Yixing wasn’t so heartbroken he would have thought it was cute. Not now though. Not when it feels as if his heart has been ripped right from his chest.
“I’m sorry. Your total is 3:15.” Sehun says slightly out of breath. He wipes his lips with the back of his hand sending another spike of jealousy through Yixing. Luhan is standing a little ways behind him with a smirk plastered to his face. Yixing knows it’s unfair to hate him without even knowing him but he does, he hates him so much.
Yixing hands Sehun the money making sure their hands don’t even brush a little. He would have normally purposely touched him to try and get something out of it but not today. He's not in the mood to play silly little games.
As soon as Sehun hands Yixing his change he spins on his heels and heads towards the exit suddenly needing to take a deep lungful of fresh air. He really just needs to get as far away from Sehun and this store as he can.
“Have a nice day!” Sehun says cheerily just as Yixing walks out the front door. Yixing will not be having a nice day.
He manages to hold everything in until he gets a good distance away from the store but he can’t hold it in forever. Eventually the tears come hot and heavy making his whole face bloated and gross. How can simply liking someone hurt so much? He sits down on a secluded bench in the mostly empty park. He’s just glad he decided to go early in the morning and not wait until later tonight when he would have surely made a huge fool out of himself.
He cries himself out on that park bench. He even calls into work to say he needs to take the day off, take a day to clear his mind and figure out why this is hurting him so much. He doesn’t really tell his manager that but he’s pretty sure that Wufan can tell that he is emotional over something. Wufan may be his boss but they were pretty good friends after work hours. "If you need another day that's fine also. I don't know what happened but you sound really upset."
Yixing sniffles into the phone. "I should be fine by tomorrow." he ends the call and slides his phone back into his pocket just as he's assaulted with another round of tears and pain.
10:04 AM
Yixing answers his phone immediately, needing to hear his friend’s voice. Joonmyun has always been there when things got tough and Yixing needs him now more than he ever has before.
“You were right.” Yixing almost sobs into the phone when he answers.
Joonmyun makes a sound on the other end. "I'm sorry Yixing. I told you not to do it. Do you want to come over? We can watch comedies, order pizza and get you through this minor bump."
Yixing is so grateful he has someone like Joonmyun as his friend. "Can you pick me up?"
12:04
Stuffed with pizza, lying haphazardly across Joonmyun's floor Sehun feels slightly better. The whoel situation this morning is almost completely forgotten. Just a small twinge of pain comes to Yixing whenever he thinks about Sehun, not as bad as before but just enough to remind him how stupid he is.
“What happened?” Joonmyun asks as the end credits to the movie they just finished move down the screen.
Yixing knew this question was inevitable. Joonmyun is his best friend of course he would want to know what could have upset Yixing so much. Yixing sighs and sits up. He scoots towards the couch until his back is resting against it. Joonmyun’s legs are to the right of him hanging over the edge of the couch. Yixing focuses his eyes on the empty pizza box lying a few feet away from him. He runs a hand through his hair, takes a deep breath and begins to speak.
12:32
“You were that close?” are the first words out of Joonmyun’s mouth. “You were really going to tell him right as some other guy walked in? Wow Yixing, I thought I had it bad but that’s just…wow.”
“I’m such and idiot.” Yixing drops his head into his hands. “If I just did it when I first met him, maybe asked him to hang out or something I wouldn’t be here right now, dying inside feeling completely stupid.”
Joonmyun chuckles lightly. “Yes you would. I bet that he has known that Luhan person for a while. I mean I could be wrong but it seems Luhan staked his claim a while ago.” Joonmyun shrugs. “Sorry Yixing but it’s not like you loved him, you’ll get through this easily.”
Yixing latches onto Joonmyun’s words. He hopes to god that Joonmyun is right.
Joonmyun moves to the edge of the couch and then drops to the floor next to Yixing. His eyes lock with Yixing’s. The air between them suddenly seems to tense from what Yixing isn’t sure.
Joonmyun focuses onto Yixing with serious eyes. “Yixing.”
Yixing swallows hard not liking the new mood in the room. “What’s wrong with you?” he asks trying to sound playful.
“I need to confess something to you before you pull another stunt like this.” Joonmyun takes in a deep breath seeming to suck all the oxygen out of the air and into his lungs. He stares at Yixing unblinkingly sending a shiver up Yixing’s spine. “I love you.”
Yixing is speechless. He has no idea what to say to Joonmyun. He didn’t see this coming, he had no idea that Joonmyun even felt anything romantic for him in any way at all. How could Joonmyun have hidden his feeling for so long? But then again how long has even had these feelings? Yixing has been friends with Joonmyun for the past ten years. Has he felt something for him the whole time or is it new?
“I’m sorry.” Joonmyun mumbles after a long thick silence.
Yixing shakes his head. “You have nothing to be sorry about. I just didn’t have any idea.”
Joonmyun looks down at his twisted up hands sitting in his lap. “Do you feel anything for me at all?”
Yixing is suddenly on his feet. “I am so sorry Joonmyun. I don’t think of you in that way, not even a little bit. You’re my best friend. I have never thought of you as something more and I never will.” He doesn’t mean to sound so harsh but if he softens it Joonmyun might still think it’s a possibility for him to have feeling back when it’s not a possibility. He doesn’t want to breed false hope in someone he cares about, doesn’t want to cause more pain than what’s necessary.
“I understand.” Joonmyun wipes a stray tear from his cheek. “I think you should go now Yixing. We both need time to think about things.”
Yixing stares down at his friend. “I really am sorry.” He turns and slowly leaves his friend’s apartment without another word. There isn’t anything left to be said.
3:45
Everything has changes in the span of less than twelve hours. Yixing had a slight heartbreak and all his hope diminished and then dealt the same feelings out to his best friend.
Yixing sits down on his couch, puts his feet up on the table in front of him. His foot accidently knocks into an old Styrofoam cup from the day before. It falls over its bottom facing Yixing. That’s when he sees it. Numbers are scribbled onto the bottom of the cup. Yixing puts his feet back on the carpet and grabs the cup.
He wants to throw it across the ocean. Underneath the number, a phone number to be exact, is a name with a small smiley face drawn next to it. Underneath the name it has a small amount of writing that reads ‘Call me’
This whole time Sehun had noticed Yixing. Yixing wonders how many times Sehun has written his number on the bottom of his cups when he wasn’t paying attention.
Yixing feels like an idiot once again but just underneath that he feels his hope bloom anew.
to be continued......