What is Forgiveness?

[neekienoo]

I was watching a movie--Madea's Family Reunion--and there was a scene where a mother let her 2nd husband have his way with her oldest daughter just so that she could continue to live her comfortable life style. As I was watching this scene play out, I couldn't help but think of the scripture 2 Timothy 3:1-5; there it speaks of "men being lovers of

Comments

[kimaginethis]

Well, I am not a forgive and forget kind of girl. I know it is not a good thing, but there it is. I think I do forgive, but I never ever forget, and that can sometimes be tough for everyone involved.

[neekienoo]

Well you're ahead of me already because if someone has hurt me in a serious way I have never forgiven them. I have never forgiven someone in my heart or said it to them. I've forgiven friends over trivial things or misunderstanding but I feel that there are some things that are just unforgivable. I don't know if it's good but I am such a private person that I keep everything to myself and close to my heart, good and bad. This could be why I don't forgive people because when I get hurt I never really let it go or find a way to heal, I keep it so close to me that whenever I see someone who has hurt me, what they did comes to the forefront.

[kimaginethis]

I get that, I am guilty of it, and I can see where you might have done that. You are a better woman than am I, though. Make no mistake.

[neekienoo]

Just so you know (aside from my mother) you played a big role in who I am today, so don't make light of how great of a person you are. There is no way I can be better than a person who helped to make me who I am. *hugs* :)

[anniebannannie]

Hi, I'm friends with Kim, figured I'd answer with my opinion

[neekienoo]

I agree with you 100%, and it's something that I know that I need to work on (one of many). I always pray that I learn the true meaning of forgiveness and learn how to forgive in a Christian way, in the same way that God and Christ forgive us for the many sins we make against them on a daily basis.

Thanks for your input.

[lucy_bird]

Hi, I came over from Kim's journal.

I guess it can always be hard to forgive people, and possibly even harder to forget (after all it could mean letting your barriers down to get hurt again). But I think in the long run it's harder not to forgive, because otherwise you're letting what happened rule your life, you're always going to be bitter about it, and that's going to stop you moving on. Maybe forgetting is not so important, in some cases forgetting would be too much, because you have to learn from your experience (e.g. in the example you gave the daughter shouldn't forget what the mother did because then the mother would be able to control her again). I don't think forgiveness necessarily has to mean saying 'I forgive you', but can mean letting things go.

[neekienoo]

I like how you put it:
I don't think forgiveness necessarily has to mean saying 'I forgive you', but can mean letting things go.

So forgiveness isn't so much about the person as it about you, not allowing the event to stop you from living your life and moving on.