Medical merriment

[negaduck9]

I took the day off today to have my yearly checkups with my GYN and GP. I always schedule them together so I only have to take one day off work (Cobb County public transportation issue, DO NOT ASK.) and so I can say "Um, I just had a pelvic an hour ago, can I forego it here

Comments

[lickety_split]

I hate it when my GYN tries to talk to me while examining me. Like, "Bitch you have medieval scissors shoved up my vagina, your talking is breaking my concentration!!!"

[negaduck9]

Actually, I don't mind when my GYN does that, because she's gentle enough that the exam is merely uncomfortable rather than painful, and she does it quickly. Nearly every time after she finishes I'm like "That's it? You're done already? Nice."

Two years ago I made the mistake of agreeing to see one of the NPs rather than my doctor, and I had the worst GYN experience of my life. You know how medieval tortures began with "the showing of the instruments"? I learned in that exam just why. She started out prodding me nastily, then said, I kid you not, "I can't find your cervix!" For chrissakes, where do you think it is?! She got a bigger speculum - I normally take the smallest size, and this vile thing looked big enough for an exam on an ox - and after holding it up so I could get a good look she plunged that bastard in and ratcheted it open. It must have been made of titanium, as I was probably clamping down hard enough by that time to bend mere steel.