How It Should Have Middled

[nekoewen]

I've been thinking way too much about plotting, and especially the very bad plotting in the Star Wars prequels. Without getting too much into that, I give you, something that should have happened in Star Wars Episode III:

Palpatine: Amidala, where is the child?

Amidala: [looking away] Somewhere safe.

Palpatine: [a little irritation showing through]

Comments

[_thiefofhearts_]

When I walked out of that movie, I wondered why Amidala even needed to die, especially when Leia mentions that her mother "was often sad" in Jedi, suggesting that she hooks up with Senator Jimmy Smitts.

Or that Obi Wan didn't know about Leia ("That boy is our last hope...") even though he was RIGHT THERE IN THE DELIVERY ROOM!

Lucas seriously needed to watch his movies again.

[nekoewen]

Yeah, the prequels kinda forgot about or at least made drastically more contrived certain aspects of the continuity.

One thing I read that was seriously awesome was on Cracked they mentioned there's a fan theory that both R2-D2 and Chewbacca are rebel agents all along. R2 kept an eye on the princess while a memory-wiped C-3PO bumbled along beside him, and Chewbacca, on Yoda's orders, partnered with a smuggler who operated out of Tattooine to keep an ear to the ground. If they'd had a reveal for that, it would've been epic.

"Awraaaaraagh!"
"What? A weapons cache from the Clone Wars? How the hell could you know that?"
"Raaaaghaaarraaahra!"
"You helped put it there. Riiiight."
[Iris-wipe to Han and Chewie standing in the weapons cache.]
"Chewie, you've got some explaining to do."
Chewie hefts a massive blaster cannon on his shoulder. "Brawr!"
"Uh... right."

[spross]

I was still pissed there was no scene of Jar Jar being stepped on by a Walker... :(

[nekoewen]

I liked Kevin Smith's solution. Someone asked him how he would get rid of Jar Jar, and he said he'd have someone casually mention it and move on.

"By the way, I haven't seen Jar Jar around here lately?"
"He died."
"..." *shrug* "So about the Trade Federation..."

[tundra_no_caps]

That whole movie had no real plot, but merely Plot-points. Someone jotted the outline, then forgot to fill it in.

Emperor: Be evil, join the dark side.
Annakin: No, I will not.
Emperor: Join us!
Annakin: I will join you, but for good reasons, and I will do no evil.
Annakin goes forth and slays all the Jedi-children.

[sirclay]

Personally, I always thought Amidala should've been killed by Obi-wan. Before you get the wrong idea, I don't mean DIRECTLY. But face it, we already have the set up: The Jedi are a beurocratic mess. Now just imagine if Amidala were allowed to die because "The Jedi could not risk that many good men" or sat on their butts too long, etc. Anakin IMMEDIATELY has a reason to hate the Jedi, and for that matter, hate Obi-wan. Cue Slaughtering younglings. Of all the injustices the prequels have done, I think totally wimping out Darth Vader has to be by far the worst.

Well, that, and midochondolodoritoislorians.