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May 12, 2010 21:32

Wow. No London.

I knew I was up against big guns here, but I have to say I'm disappointed I didn't even make it to the interview rounds.

I have no idea what I should be doing now.

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nemesae May 12 2010, 21:07:20 UTC
I was really confident about my portfolio :( I mean, enough to at least get an interview. If I wouldn't make it then, at least you'd get some feedback in person, right? A 'regret to inform you' standard sentence tells me nothing what could be improved, or where my weak points are. It feels a little like every choice I make that's not wholly my own is successful and every thing I spend a lot of time in because I really want to make it work, fails. But then why chase goals wholeheartedly?

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cosmosmith May 12 2010, 21:16:43 UTC
Man, that really sucks ):

I know you were really looking forward to it (from that one time we talked on the train!). Good luck figuring out what to do from now on.

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nemesae May 12 2010, 21:28:36 UTC
(All sorts of things haunt in my head now. Since there's, you know, a huge amount of money that was for uni tuition, and is now not anymore for uni tuition. But they're not realistic. They're things like making a living out of airbrushing or tatt designs or whatnot.)

Nevertheless, yeah. Sucks badly :/ A lot of things stop feeling useful.

(ps. kjhkjsad I totally didn't see you add me. Added back now!)

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bulgocrazyi May 12 2010, 21:36:48 UTC
Sounds like me. Just, try again, if you want it so badly just try again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9ya9BXClRw

watch it.

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nemesae May 12 2010, 21:56:52 UTC
We're in very much the same situation now it seems, yeah. I'm going to keep trying. But something else. This is once a year, the school application thing, and I won't wait a full year to apply again. Will draw some other plans in the mean time. There's always the chance next year will fail too. It just needs getting used to, because it's a big drawback after spending so much time on it.

The speech was good to hear <3 Thanks for linking it. It's motivational.

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bulgocrazyi May 12 2010, 22:12:42 UTC
You know two years ago they told me I cant teach in korea cuz i am not native. A year later it was said i cant study Korean at a school because there is only one uni. I am studying at a school now I will probably go to do a summer school and I have decided to just keep on trying for a job. Don't let them tell you you cant. You are talented, but talent is worth nothing if you aren't willing to fight hard for it. Seriously keep on trying, it will pay off eventually. Don't let your talent go to waste and just see this as a life lesson and get stronger. It sucks, it does, but try again. If you aren;t willing to try again next year then you didn't want it all that much to begin with. Because if you did you'd try again and again until you got it.

So seriously Natasja, don't give up. Keep going.

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nemesae May 13 2010, 06:07:11 UTC
I'm really glad you linked me that video. I'm already coming up with alternatives. Though nowhere near the level that that course was, it's at least something. Also, I wasn't aware you have searched a lot for Korean classes. You poked me with it one day, remember? I thought you saw it around, not that you've been looking for ages. I'm happy you found it though <3 You really like going there.

But it's a good life lesson. Basically what it tells me is that I'm not (yet) good enough. Now there's motivation to get better <3 Thanks <3

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