IM conversation with basement_rerun
schroderhoven (10:30:59 PM): Rerun?
notontvrerun (10:31:19 PM): Yeah, Schroeder?
schroderhoven (10:31:54 PM): I was hoping that we could schedule a time and place to meet.
notontvrerun (10:32:43 PM): Sure, that's fine. I'm free pretty much any time.
schroderhoven (10:33:42 PM): How is Wednesday?
notontvrerun (10:33:55 PM): Wednesday works for me, when and where?
schroderhoven (10:35:58 PM): Over lunch at Ernie's Sandwich Shop?
notontvrerun (10:36:44 PM): Sounds good to me, Schro. I'll meet you their at twelve?
schroderhoven (10:38:31 PM): Yes.
notontvrerun (10:39:11 PM): Alright. And, Schro?
schroderhoven (10:39:21 PM): What?
notontvrerun (10:39:47 PM): I really am sorry...
schroderhoven (10:40:08 PM): About what?
notontvrerun (10:40:13 PM): You know.
schroderhoven (10:40:43 PM): No. There is a lot that happened. I want to know what exactly you are sorry for, and don't you dare say everything.
notontvrerun (10:42:45 PM): I'm sorry for making it public. I'm sorry for hurting you.
schroderhoven (10:43:22 PM): That doesn't make me any less of a freak.
notontvrerun (10:43:38 PM): You're not a freak, Schroeder.
schroderhoven (10:45:50 PM): Your family seems to think so. I know that you love them Rerun, but neither Linus nor Lucy have been exactly fair.
notontvrerun (10:47:24 PM): I know, and that's my fault. I'm going to talk with both of them. I promise I'll try to get them to leave you alone.
schroderhoven (10:48:48 PM): It would be appreciated. This doesn't feel justified in the slightest.
notontvrerun (10:49:20 PM): It's not, and I'm sorry about that, too.
schroderhoven (10:50:20 PM): You have a support system. Mine is you, and the time I needed it, it was gone.
notontvrerun (10:51:06 PM): I'm really sorry, Schro... I... I wish none of it had happened. If I could take it back, I would.
schroderhoven (10:52:35 PM): So why did you announce it publicly? When you did that you brought me into it whether you wanted that effect or not.
notontvrerun (10:55:40 PM): I... I don't know why I did it. It was stupid of me, and I regret it. As I said, if I could do it over, I would, in a heart beat. I'm so sorry that this has hurt you, really.
schroderhoven (10:57:53 PM): I don't know what to think or say, Rerun. I honestly don't.
notontvrerun (10:59:38 PM): I know. I'm sorry. I wouldn't blame you if you never wanted to talk to me again...
schroderhoven (11:00:51 PM): No. That's not what I want at all. I know things can't be the way they were before, but I don't want them to continue as they are now.
notontvrerun (11:02:32 PM): Tell me what you want, Schro.
schroderhoven (11:04:12 PM): Ideally to have you feel the same about me as I do about you, but since I know that is unlikely I just want my friend back.
notontvrerun (11:08:04 PM): Can I call you instead, Schroeder? I want to ask you something.
schroderhoven (11:08:24 PM): Alright. I'll be here.
notontvrerun (11:08:51 PM): *picks up his phone and calls Schroeder, waiting for his friend to pick up*
schroderhoven (11:09:59 PM): *looks at the phone and lets it ring, contemplating not picking it up at all, finally does at the end of the third ring* Schroeder.
notontvrerun (11:11:44 PM): *lets out an inaudible sigh of relief when Schroeder picks up* Hey, Schro...
schroderhoven (11:12:27 PM): *getting right to it* What did you want to ask me?
notontvrerun (11:14:11 PM): *pauses for a moment* How exactly do you feel about me? I realize this is probably a stupid question to ask, but I need to hear the answer. How do you feel about me, Schroeder?
schroderhoven (11:16:40 PM): I'd like to date you.
notontvrerun (11:18:36 PM): Ok...
schroderhoven (11:19:48 PM): *voice rising, getting more irritated* You wanted to know badly enough to make me say it to you and now all that you can say back is ok?!
notontvrerun (11:21:31 PM): *voice rises as well* What do you want me to say, Schroeder? I'm still trying to deal with all this!
schroderhoven (11:22:57 PM): Just something would be nice! A polite person would in turn reply how they feel.
notontvrerun (11:24:55 PM): Well, obviously I'm not very polite, am I?! It's how I feel that I'm trying to figure out! I can't tell you have I feel when I don't have the best idea of it myself!
schroderhoven (11:26:58 PM): You don't even know if you would like to be my friend again. Thank you for your honesty.
notontvrerun (11:28:44 PM): I never said that, Schroeder. I do still want to be your friend.
schroderhoven (11:29:49 PM): That falls under the general area of how you feel then, doesn't it? I wasn't to one leaping to conclusions.
notontvrerun (11:31:06 PM): Fine. I still want to be your friend, Schro. I'd like to think we'll always be friends.
schroderhoven (11:31:30 PM): I'd like to think that too.
notontvrerun (11:33:40 PM): If we both want it, I think it will happen...
schroderhoven (11:34:21 PM): I want it.
notontvrerun (11:34:30 PM): So do I.
schroderhoven (11:35:32 PM): You asked me what I wanted from you. What do you want from me?
notontvrerun (11:37:35 PM): I want us to both be happy, Schroeder.
schroderhoven (11:38:11 PM): What can I do to aid that?
notontvrerun (11:41:46 PM): I don't know. I just... give me some time to think about things, alright?
schroderhoven (11:44:46 PM): Alright. Would you rather I not talk to you until Wednesday?
notontvrerun (11:46:06 PM): No, we can talk, just... Let's keep the serious stuff til Wednesday, alright?
schroderhoven (11:47:17 PM): I'm unsure if I will be able to considering it's the elephant in the room, but I can try.
notontvrerun (11:48:16 PM): I mean, you can bring it up, but please don't get upset with me if I try and change the subject. I really need to think about things.
schroderhoven (11:48:33 PM): Like I said, I can try.
notontvrerun (11:48:50 PM): I appreciate it.
schroderhoven (11:53:13 PM): *there's a long pause on the other end Schroeder is curling and uncurling his fingers, when he replies his voice is shaky and hoarse* I will see you Wednesday then.
notontvrerun (11:56:01 PM): *takes a shaky breath, drumming his fingers against his leg* I'll see you Wednesday, Schro.
schroderhoven (11:59:46 PM): *holds himself together long enough to say goodbye, then quickly hangs up the phone, feeling more depressed than ever and pockets his phone, stalking over to the piano and sitting in front of it to pound away at the keys, determined to be angry rather than sad*