Phosphorescent Lights: Epilogue: Kame's Life
Every secret has a price…
Title: Phosphorescent Lights
Summary: A photographer with no memories whose goal in life is to seek out what he has lost; a businessman who swore revenge for the death of his lover while desperately trying to escape his fixated reality. Two entirely different men with entirely different lives bound together by the threads of destiny. But little do the two know that they are bounded together by more than just simple destiny…
Genre: Romance/Drama
Pairings: Akame (primary), Ryoda (secondary) mentions of Jinda, Pin, Ryopi, Kokame, Kamaki
Other Characters: Jin, Kame, Ueda, Yamashita, Ryo, Koki, slight appearances from Taguchi, Nakamaru, Shige, Ayase, Tegoshi
Content: Romance, drama, AU [Alternate Universe]
Author: Nerd-san
Disclaimer: I am not in any way affiliated with Johnny Entertainment
…are they willing to pay it?
Phosphorescent Lights: Epilogue
Kame’s Life
One Month Later
I felt a little nervous but nonetheless continued throwing in the necessities from work into the cardboard box in front of me. There was no one else save my co-workers in the room and for some reason I could feel myself holding my breath. Gosh.
I could feel Shige gazing at me intently from his seat, still hacking away at his laptop, Ayase’s frown as she walked out of the dark room with photos in hand and I could hear my manager tapping his foot against his desk heavily; cigarette dangling out of his mouth.
There was absolute silence as I continued to put in a few more things into the box. Talk about awkward.
Today was the day that I was finally going back to Tokyo. Jin had already started to look around for photography jobs for me and in the meanwhile I was stuck in the hospital taking check-ups, hearing the various things I could and couldn’t do.
“Don’t stray too close to A. Jewelry,” or “don’t talk to people who hurt your head” were words I’ve heard one too many times. The doctors treated me like some sort of freak charity case, but I wasn’t about to ignore their words. To an extent.
“Kame-kun~” Ayase called me in her usual sing-song voice and plopped herself right next to me, peeking into the box. I shuffled a little awkwardly but continued packing nonetheless.
“Kame-kun, are you really, really leaving?” she sounded a little hurt, but what could I say? That I wasn’t going to go? I cleared my throat to remind my friend of something called one’s ‘personal bubble’, but the manager had already cut my speech off with his choking coughs.
“So ya really gettin’ outta here, huh?” he coughed twice more and then began to rub his throat to calm down his vocal cords. I nodded timidly and he merely laughed, throwing his feet one on top of the other and began to rub his ragged beard wearily. “We’re gonna miss ya, kid.”
Gosh, I thought; had these people never had to say goodbye to a fellow employee? It wasn’t that I was mad at them - not at all - it was just that they were tugging at my poor heartstrings. If I could pack the three of them away with me, I honestly would. But I couldn’t.
When I first came to work here three years ago, I couldn’t remember a thing about these people. They didn’t seem to mind. It was a little discomfiting at first, but eventually we got over the initial quietness when we broke the ice with each other.
I still have to thank the solemn Shige for losing balance from his chair that day Ayase, the manager and I broke out laughing into simultaneous laughter. It felt like we were whole again.
This dysfunctional family of mine - I was really going to miss them.
But Jin was my new family. It was what I had subconsciously decided. From the moment we met to the moment we parted; it was what I had decided.
“Kame-kun?” Ayase asked again, desolately poking the box with a chipped nail. “Are you really, really getting married?” if she continued to look this helpless I was sure I was going to have a downhearted trip to Tokyo.
“Ayase, leave him alone. It’s what he’s decided,” Shige defended me without looking up. I smiled at him as a sort of quiet thanks but I was sure that Shige hadn’t seen.
Ayase continued to frown and even pressed her folded arms across her chest and sat down on my chair.
I couldn’t help but crack a smile at her childish behavior when I said, “you can come to the wedding. It’ll be in about a week.” Her eyes brightened at this aspect. “You have to be there, got it?”
She nodded her head furiously and to the point I was sure it was going to fall off her tiny body. “I’ll be there!” she turned around to our manager and then to Shige, “we’ll all be there, right?!”
“Wouldn’t wanna miss our little Kamenashi-chan getting married, would we?” the manager himself seemed delighted and he took his feet off the desk. He walked up to me as soon as I finished taping the box shut and placed a hand on my shoulder.
“But seriously Kamenashi, we’re all gonna miss ya,” he jerked his thumb to the work-absorbed Shige, “even that kid. This is just his way of saying goodbye.”
I looked over at Shige, who had tried to act indifferent but I could see his red ears. I laughed. I was really going to miss these people. I knew that they were out there somewhere in this world, but at last I had found them. My family.
Perhaps not biologically, but these people were as close as they got. It was going to be easy to miss each other in this vast, vast world, but I knew that my leaving wouldn’t be the end of everything.
I heaved the box with both hands and walked over to the door. I took a deep breath. “I…I’m really going to miss everyone here. And I mean it.”
“I can’t really remember what we’ve gone through before, but I’m pretty sure it was as argumentative as what we’ve been through the past three years.”
I felt myself beginning to blush and even Shige turned off his laptop to look at me. Ayase looked so heartbroken and even our manager put out his cigar and made sure a fit of harsh coughs followed; to keep himself from becoming teary-eyed, I figured.
My hand shook a little as I placed it on the doorknob. “You’d…” I muttered and tried to swallow the large lump in my throat to finish my sentence, “you’d better be at the wedding.”
Ayase was the first to run up to me and throw me into a tight embrace. Without hesitation, I hugged her back. “We’ll be there for sure,” she said. Shige nodded and said the same and god damn it, I felt the tears welding up in the corner of my eyes.
“Come on an’ get outta here!” The manager came between the three of us and playfully shoved me out of the office. “Yer fiancé’s waitin’!” he called as my box and I left the room. I turned and gave him a quick hug as well before running back home.
Seriously, I was going to miss these people.
But Jin was waiting for me, and we were going to get married. I smiled at the thought as I walked home. I had already begun to halfheartedly pack most of my belongings the night previous with Koki but hadn’t succeeded in finishing.
He was waiting for me at home to finish up the deed before I left Okinawa for good. The past month had been nothing but me bugging Koki for information about Jin, what he was like, what we did, and so forth.
Koki was beginning to get accustomed to the ordeal but he never once complained. He told me what he did know about Jin - which wasn’t much at all - but I still felt like there were some things he was straying away from mentioning. I didn’t pester him, either.
“Koki, I’m back.” I called once I got through the front door and closed it behind me. Koki was already in the living room, remote listlessly hanging from his hand as he crookedly lifted his head to greet me.
“Yo,” he straightened himself and turned off the television, “ready to pack?” I nodded and set the box down on the nearest table. A part of me still refused to believe that this was actually happening while the other, more impractical side knew that it was.
“Kame, the second you get lonely up there you call me, got it?” Koki said evidently and handed me the last of my items to stuff into my already over-packed suitcase.
I crouched down on the living room floor beside him and squished in the shirt. “I’m not going to get lonely.” I said blandly and Koki handed me other things, and quietly that was how the rest of the evening progressed.
I could tell that Koki was trying his best to say the right words, but nothing was forming. I tried my best to keep the laughter down but when Koki choked over his speech for the umpteenth time, I couldn’t help myself.
“W-What?!” Koki bristled, folding his arms across his chest in a defensive stance. “What’s so funny?”
I sighed melodramatically and got up to open up the cardboard box so that I could dump its contents into another suitcase. “You’re treating me like I’m dying. Koki, I’m just moving.”
“And getting married,” he added instantly. I rolled my eyes.
It was all anyone’s been talking about for the past month, and even on the news. Apparently Jin was a big shot in the business industry; the president of a company I’ve never heard of. And marrying another man was sure to catch the hawk-like eyes of the media.
There had been countless live press-releases featuring Jin - I’ve watched them all on television - asking him about the wedding plans and why he had chose to turn down the offer of the Horikita Company. For some reason the name gave me an unpleasant feeling, but I let it slide.
“I know that there are probably a lot of people who don’t agree with this and even call it poor judgment on my part,” was what Jin said when the press had asked him about the marriage.
“I don’t know how this will affect the business deals A. Jewelry has with other companies but I can assure you that I would rather resign as president than not go through with this. What I have with Kamenashi Kazuya-san is probably what people spend a lifetime searching for. If you can’t give us your blessings, than I’m not going to force you. That’s all I have to say.”
Then the camera angle on the television changed as the reporter blocked the watcher’s view of Jin and stated that the press conference was over in her bubbly yet upbeat voice. “Well, you’ve heard what President Akanishi has to say! And that concludes this session!”
That had been about two days ago once the actual wedding date had been decided. Jin, being the big doofus that he is, had actually called afterwards and apologized for having to address me formally.
He called a lot, actually. Once or twice a day. I had even begun to grow accustomed to having him call. Usually it couldn’t be for too long because of business, but I didn’t mind. Hearing his voice was enough. Enough to realize that this was actually happening.
I zipped up my suitcase and pressed it against the couch to keep it from leaning down and falling over. “What time does the plane land?” I asked over my shoulders as I stood to my feet.
“You should be there by one, if not one-thirty.” Koki called back. “Akanishi’ll be waiting for you there. Just make sure you stay away from the media, seriously Kame, there are a lot of people against this, you know.”
How many times did I have to hear about how this marriage could ruin Jin? “I never asked Jin to be one of the most powerful people in all of Japan, Koki!” I hissed through my gritted teeth.
I didn’t meant to take it out on Koki, he was just being realistic, but for the moment I’d much rather live in my world of make-belief where our relationship was fine. “It just happened. And I know a lot of people are against it.”
I licked my lips eagerly as I headed off to my room to retire for the night. “But I don’t care.” Because I didn’t. Tomorrow, I could finally be with Jin again.
Koki sighed and began to gather his shoes at the door. I frowned and turned back. “Where do you think you’re going?” he raised an eyebrow at the question as if that had been the dumbest question he had heard thus far. “You’re staying here tonight, right?” I said in my you’re-staying-here-or-else tone.
Koki sighed again and nodded, putting away his shoes again. “Do I have a choice?”
“No.”
The next morning was a blur of rushed feelings, anxiety and excitement. I brushed my teeth, showered, changed and forced Koki out of the guest room and into the shower. He muttered angry phrases at my untimely waking but nonetheless, I got him out of bed.
“Kanishi’s ain’t gorrn anywhere!” He blurted with his toothbrush dangling from his mouth as he stuck his head out of the bathroom.
I walked by with my suitcase trailing behind me in a flat manner. Smiling, I shrugged, motioning to the door and then at my watch. Geez, could I get any more over-excited? Probably not. This was real; and I still had a hard time convincing myself of that.
We took Koki’s car to the airport and halfway through his lecture of “becoming lonely” and “coming back to Okinawa”, I stopped listening and let my min wander off to the things ahead. Jin and I were going to be together.
I didn’t care and neither did Jin, but other people did care. But this was no time to second-guess my decision of being with Jin. “Kame, I’m serious, go to the doctor’s daily and-”
The car stopped and I got out with Koki in tow. I put my hands on my hips as I took out my bag and Koki worked the trunk to retrieve my suitcase. “Koki. I’m twenty-six, not six. I can take perfect care of myself.”
“I know, I know. It’s just…” he embarrassedly rubbed the back of his neck with his red hand as he handed me the case. “It’s going to be pretty lonely without you.”
I frowned at the thought of a lonely Koki. “You’re coming to the wedding right?” I settled on saying and Koki only nodded. We walked to the departure gates together to verify the ticket.
“So I’ll be seeing you in a week. And I’ll make sure to call the week after that. You’re not killing-off our friendship that easily!” he laughed and even I cracked a large smile.
The clock was nearing time and I couldn’t contain myself. I threw myself at my friend and hugged him for a good minute. “If you get lonely, I’ll make sure to come back here to slap you for making me worry,” I muttered as we parted.
Koki shook his head. “Be a good wife, okay?”
I gaped in horror. “Koki!” Just whose side was this man on? He shook his head again and continued laughing as he shooed me off in the general direction of my plane. “Koki,” I said again and he looked up, “bye-bye.”
He raised his hand in a sort of awkward wave. He didn’t want to end this friendship and neither did I, but so long as we kept each other in mind, we wouldn’t. I didn’t cry but instead smiled as I waved back. This was no time for tears. I closed my eyes as I boarded the plane.
Bye-bye Okinawa.
The scenery in Tokyo looked new and foreign but I figured that was because this was the first time I had taken time to actually look around. With a bag slung carefully around my chest and suitcase behind me, I began to search for the way out. Where Jin was waiting for me.
I didn’t get too far before I was stopped by a security guard. I gave him a quizzed looked and they let me pass by without much hassle. I nodded but kept my head down as I hurried by. I felt the cell phone in my pocket reverberating and I took it out as soon as I could.
I flipped it open with a grin when I saw Jin’s number but just as I was about to press talk, bumped into another figure. I figured it to be another security guard, but it wasn’t.
It was a female this time, hair short, and posture perfect. I stood in awe at her poise for a minute before regarding my own slumped posture and straightening myself. My head oh-so-slightly began to ache but I disregarded the notion of knowing her.
“K-Kazu…Kamenashi-san?” she piped up, rather shocked at the deduction. I nodded and just as I was about to ask how she had known me and what our relation was, a bustling camera crew in the background spotted us and began to rapidly make their way over.
I shuddered abruptly and began to turn hot on my heels. It was then that I realized I hadn’t a clue as to where I should hide from the paparazzi and that I should have figured that they’d be expecting President Akanishi’s fiancé.
The girl however seemed to know what to do as he grabbed onto my hand and began to drag both my suitcase and I away from the busy reporters. Panting and wheezing, we stood together behind a wall as the media ran by.
I took this moment to catch my breath before turning back to her. “I’m sorry, do I know you?” I feared coming off as a little rude, but she didn’t seem to mind but instead expected the question. She shook her head ‘no’.
“Be careful,” she pointed to the exit on the opposite side of the airport and I nodded. “They’re savages. You should hurry up and get going.”
I struggled as she pushed me away and towards the exit. “But how did you know my name?” I called out hoarsely, trying to turn around and catch a better glimpse of the gentle face.
“You’re Kamenashi Kazuya - Akanishi-san’s fiancé,” she laughed as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, “who in Japan doesn’t know you now?”
“Ah,” I called out but she was already pushing her own way past me and waved a little. “Wait-” but she didn’t. I frowned at her retreating back but decided to let it go. We weren’t going to see each other again, anyway.
After that little incident, I realized to be more prompt with my movements around the place. I quietly walked out of the airport and into the streets before I was greeted by a familiar sight.
I felt my heart beating tremendously at the ribcage and my head about to explode with feelings, words, anything.
He didn’t say anything however, and neither did I. I ran up to him, dropping my suitcase and bag and latched onto him without a care for cameras or the people around us.
Jin laughed and hugged me back and even though he was tired from a late night, he lifted me up in his arms and kissed me. I missed him so much. So, so much. I grinned to myself and dropped my gaze as he put me back down but hugged him again anyway.
“Jin,” I heard myself say with a hoarse and raspy voice. ‘I love you’ or ‘I missed you’ was what I should have said, but I couldn’t help myself. I was overjoyed to the point where I couldn’t help but feel angry at him for making us wait a month.
“Stupid, inconsiderate slob! I hate you!” I wailed helplessly now, latching onto his suit as if my very existence depended on it. Holy hell, was I crying?
I couldn’t help it, I continued on with my tears and Jin did nothing but hug me back reassuringly. He always did this to me: make me feel so much emotion that I was just about ready to burst.
“Kame,” Jin whispered huskily as he dropped his head to level with mine. God, why was this man so irresistible? I flushed and looked away. “Kame, look at me.” No point, I thought. Jin forced my head back.
“I’m not going anywhere. You don’t have to hold on so hard,” he chuckled at the hold I had been constricting on him and embarrassedly, I moved my hands away and to my sides. “Not that I mind~”
I narrowed my eyes at his suggestive manner. “Pervert.”
He boomed with laughter as we made our way down the street. “Funny, I don’t remember ever once denying that.”
We were silent for a few minutes, simply walking and basking in the presence of one another. I smiled quietly at the man beside me. Were we supposed to hold hands now? I could feel myself shrinking away in shyness at the thought.
I watched Jin’s hand casually swinging by his side as he looked around where we were; his words were coming through one ear and out the other. Something about visiting someone, but I couldn’t catch the rest of his sentence.
I continued to eye Jin’s pale hand as it swung by his side. I bit my lip anxious, unsure of how to initiate the notion. I felt my hand crawling with the yearning for Jin’s, but took a deep breath soon after. I flexed my hand a few times, preparing to swoop in and take Jin’s into my own.
Jin, completely oblivious to my inward battle, continued talking away and laughing and smiling and all the other things that made my heart pick up speed immensely. I continued flexing the hand. Jin noticed this and scrunched his brows together in confusion. “Is your hand alright?” he asked.
I nodded vigorously. “Just fine,” I mumbled.
He grinned knowingly, and took his larger hand and enveloped it in mine. Feeling like a middle-school kid once more, I turned away in a flustered mortification. I couldn’t even hold his hand first.
We neared our destination soon and I had dearly wished that I had been paying more attention to where we were going because all of a sudden, we were at a graveyard. I felt my knees trembling a little uncertainly, I didn’t like the thought of death, but Jin’s warm hand was enough to get me walking again.
“I told you I was visiting a friend.” I nodded; he had, after all. I just never assumed the friend to have already passed on.
I looked about wearily but Jin continued holding on to me as we neared the tombstone that the man must have visited quite often to know of the location so perfectly. The ground refused to cover itself with snow, and it was an awkwardly warm winter but for some reason I felt cold.
Jin didn’t let go as he crouched down on his legs and quickly, I did the same. There was a large bouquet of flowers already in place, and I had figured someone must have already come by.
Jin wiped some of the dirt from the tombstone and smiled. “It’s been a while, Pi.” I listened to Jin talk to the man for a little while longer before I, too, stared at the desolate rock.
Yamashita Tomohisa, it read. He must have been an important friend to Jin. I felt bad for asking, but I did. Jin on the other hand didn’t seem to take offence to my curiosity at all. “He was a really close friend,” he told me. I nodded and slowly absorbed the information.
“Did you bring them?” Jin asked me all of a sudden and I jerked back. Jin seemed curious but I nodded and took of my bag.
Carefully, I took out what Jin had asked me to bring along with me no matter what. I didn’t understand it, actually, but I gave him the two black rings anyway. I didn’t know where they had come from, much less what they were doing in my old apartment.
Jin took them gently and placed them near the grave. He closed his eyes in a sort of prayer, and feeling somehow out of place, I did the same. Maybe I didn’t know the man, but it was the least I could do.
“Pi, I’m getting married.” Jin said suddenly and at the voice, I opened my eyes to see that Jin’s were still closed with his hands clasped together. I turned back to the white flowers on the ground.
“I hope you don’t mind. I’m sure you must be happy for me and Kame, right?” Jin voice hitched an octave but he kept composed.
“I wish you could be here right now. I wish you could see me getting married. I’ll bring you pictures of our wedding after, okay?” finishing his prayer, Jin smiled and opened his eyes to turn to me.
I, not knowing what to say, just continued to fiddle with the white roses. “Pi liked white,” Jin said as-a-matter-of-factly. I didn’t know if he was talking to me or to the roses, but I nodded. Jin stood now and I did the same.
“Ryo must have come by already,” he commented offhandedly as we began to head off.
The man who had greeted me at the airport that day; I tried to place his image inside my head. I nodded once it had come. “Oh,” I said, in lack of many other words. What was I supposed to say?
A part of me wondered what had happened to Yamashita, but another part of me told me not to ask. I gave into my human curiosity and quietly voice the question, hoping upon hoping that Jin didn’t hear.
But he did. And he seemed to carefully think over the question as if sparing my feelings. He licked his bottom lip questioningly and I raised an eyebrow at his unusual behavior. Out of character, Jin fell silent.
“S-Sorry…that must have been rude-”
“Illness.”
I blinked as I turned to the man beside me. “Illness?” I repeated.
Jin nodded. “A genetic illness.” I slowly bobbed my head up and down at the newly received information. Something about it sounded awkward and out-of-place but I said nothing. I only trailed behind Jin as we headed to Jin’s house.
To my home.
Steadily, the days with Jin passed by. I never went to where he worked, mainly because of the media exposure and more than that, because something in the back of my mind had told me to stay away.
And before I knew it, a week had passed and it was the date our wedding was scheduled for. By the time I woke up, rather sore thanks to a certain someone’s wayward personality, Jin was already gone.
I frowned heavily at the missing presence but said nothing nonetheless. I didn’t think Jin would be old-fashioned enough to believe in the entire groom-and-bride not seeing each other thing.
I shrugged off to the bathroom where I readied myself and almost an hour later, threw on my tux before heading out. Something told me that with Akanishi Jin - it was not going to be a normal wedding.
I nervously approached the church Jin had completely booked; I got lost several times before asking a cab driver where it was. As luck would have it, it was the same taxi driver I had gotten rather accustomed to. He gave me a dirty glare before giving me the directions and then one after once I left. I laughed.
I took a deep breath as I pushed past the front doors. It was now or never. I was going to promise Jin my future, my life, my everything else after this point. I took another deep breath and walked in.
Everyone. Everyone was there and I could feel my heart beginning to pick up its speed again. I could see my manager in an awkward brown suit that somehow seemed to fit him, Ayase looking as lovely as she always had, Shige trying to ignore the two wholeheartedly, and even Koki who was chatting away with people I wasn’t familiar with.
Thankfully not many people noticed me at first until I awkwardly tried to push past a few of the guests to greet Koki and my old co-workers. A hand stopped me and honestly I thought it to be Jin’s, but when I turned around, my eyes widened.
“Hello again,” she said simply, smiling at me in her sky-blue dress but this time her hair was done in a different manner. She looked good, really good, so in turn I gave her a clumsy bow and a small greeting. “It’s your big day, huh?”
I nodded politely, trying to keep my mind off of scanning the crowd for my missing fiancé. She didn’t look disappointed at my lack of attention to her but instead expectant. She laughed a little. “Do you mind if I call you Kazuya?”
I widened my eyes at her blunt nature. She flushed and quickly shook her hand and began to fan her hands in the front of her face. “I-I didn’t mean it like that, it just feels more natural like this.” thinking about it; it really did feel more wholesome if she did. Still unable to form words, I smiled at her and told her that it was fine.
“That day…that day you were right. There’s nothing much you can do, but you have much more sincerity than anyone else ever can. I hope that you can forgive me one day.” I didn’t understand her, but my head began to ache just a tad. I wondered silently if I knew her at one point in my life.
“Did I know-”
“You have a marriage to get over with! Go!” She shoved me in the alters’ direction and I tried my best not to laugh again. She seemed to always shoo me off before hurrying away herself.
People began to seat themselves and I could hear the deafening music playing the background. A couple of the guest’s laughed and I flushed at Jin’s stupid, stupid choice of music.
People began to sit down and it was evident that I was about the only person standing now. They stared and felt myself become even more nervous than I had been a second ago.
And far more importantly - where was Jin?!
I didn’t know what to do, so I simply stood where I was. I looked lost and possibly a little helpless but I couldn’t help myself. In a crowd of strangers, here I was and Jin was nowhere to be found.
“Kame - what’re ya doing?!” In the crowd of strangers, I heard Koki’s reassuring voice and took a deep breath. I spotted him again only this time he was sitting down beside Ayase and someone else I hadn’t really known.
Clumsily, I began to make my way to the alter, trying to ignore the embarrassing music. I made a mental note to kill Jin after the party. I took several more deep breaths in an attempt to calm my nerves and finally, finally, found myself in front of the crowd and where I was supposed to be.
Someone I had recognized as Nakamaru Yuichi from A. Jewelry - or at least Jin had told me about - handed me a bouquet of flowers. I looked back at him questioningly. He apologized through his gestures and whispered that it was what Jin had instructed him to do. I groaned. Loud.
Did Jin think I was going to give up dominance that willingly?