(no subject)
What if Hamlet were gay?
No, seriously, hear me out. I see you, with your mouse over the "back" button! Stop that right now! 'Cuz this is gonna be good.
Picture:
Hamlet and Guildenstern are having an affair in England prior to opening. Hamlet returns to Denmark, full of self-loathing because let's consider the era, shall we? and hits on Ophelia to cover it up, Ophelia being a general chump like that. Then when R&G show up, Hamlet is at first overjoyed to see G, but then terrified of being outed.
Imagine "to be or not to be" as Hamlet thinking of suicide because he can't be with the one he loves. I mean, he's probably already torn up about it because of his religion anyways. And those "thousand natural shocks"? Sounds a lot like "holy shit! I'm gay - and SHOCKED!". And the pangs of despised love? You get my point.
Now, imagine Ophelia overhearing all this and realising what's going on. That would make for the best 3/1 EVAR.
"In thy orisons be all my sins remembered" = puh-LEEZE don't out me!
"Why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners?"
"I say we shall have no more marriage!"
CLEARLY gay. And taking out all his confusion and anger on the homophobic Ophelia. That, by the way, is where he snaps in my 'lil interpretion.
You'd have to switch 3/2 up a bit, so that Guildenstern and Hamlet wind up alone, probably just outside the where The Mousetrap is going on, for their little exchange. And they totally kiss. Hamlet's being all dismissive and bitchy because he's so scared of being caught, and then G gets all "My lord, you once did love me" with his puppydog eyes, and Hamlet kisses him. Then he's tortured by the fact that he has to lie to him with the whole "Sir, I lack advancement" deal, but when he finds the letter he's pissed right off / crazy enough to have him killed and it's TRAGIC.
Would that not be awesome?
All that said, I'm having some serious R&G love these days. After reading R&G Are Dead, then seeing the movie, it's occured to me just how adorable those two bumbling idiots are. In my dream production of Hamlet, they would be left alone on stage for a minute, probably right before they're dispatched to England, and one of them would flip a coin before they exited.
*sigh*
I should be a director.
Edit: I meant Rosencrantz. Sheesh, even I do it.
No, seriously, hear me out. I see you, with your mouse over the "back" button! Stop that right now! 'Cuz this is gonna be good.
Picture:
Hamlet and Guildenstern are having an affair in England prior to opening. Hamlet returns to Denmark, full of self-loathing because let's consider the era, shall we? and hits on Ophelia to cover it up, Ophelia being a general chump like that. Then when R&G show up, Hamlet is at first overjoyed to see G, but then terrified of being outed.
Imagine "to be or not to be" as Hamlet thinking of suicide because he can't be with the one he loves. I mean, he's probably already torn up about it because of his religion anyways. And those "thousand natural shocks"? Sounds a lot like "holy shit! I'm gay - and SHOCKED!". And the pangs of despised love? You get my point.
Now, imagine Ophelia overhearing all this and realising what's going on. That would make for the best 3/1 EVAR.
"In thy orisons be all my sins remembered" = puh-LEEZE don't out me!
"Why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners?"
"I say we shall have no more marriage!"
CLEARLY gay. And taking out all his confusion and anger on the homophobic Ophelia. That, by the way, is where he snaps in my 'lil interpretion.
You'd have to switch 3/2 up a bit, so that Guildenstern and Hamlet wind up alone, probably just outside the where The Mousetrap is going on, for their little exchange. And they totally kiss. Hamlet's being all dismissive and bitchy because he's so scared of being caught, and then G gets all "My lord, you once did love me" with his puppydog eyes, and Hamlet kisses him. Then he's tortured by the fact that he has to lie to him with the whole "Sir, I lack advancement" deal, but when he finds the letter he's pissed right off / crazy enough to have him killed and it's TRAGIC.
Would that not be awesome?
All that said, I'm having some serious R&G love these days. After reading R&G Are Dead, then seeing the movie, it's occured to me just how adorable those two bumbling idiots are. In my dream production of Hamlet, they would be left alone on stage for a minute, probably right before they're dispatched to England, and one of them would flip a coin before they exited.
*sigh*
I should be a director.
Edit: I meant Rosencrantz. Sheesh, even I do it.