The Talk, Version 2.0
Title: The Talk, Version 2.0
Author: nerdyandromeda
Spoilers: Blissfully spoiler free!
Warnings: Just The Warblers being so awesome! And Wes talking a lot, haha!
A/N: So, this really won’t make sense unless you read this wonderful fic, The Talk, by the wonderful smash_leigh . After extensive fangirling in the comments, the also-wonderful pyro_semi suggested that The Warblers have a “talk” with Kurt. I fangirled, and offered to write it. She agreed, thus, our lovechild! Enjoy!
By the way, since not all of the Warblers have names, I made some up. This is a spur of the moment ficlet, so it is un-beta’d. All screwups are mine!
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“Guys, what the hell are you doing?” Kurt huffed, latching onto Wes’ arm like he’s close to drowning. “ I can’t see anything because of this damn blindfold, and you tied it OVER MY BANGS. If my hair gets messed up, you will all suffer a painful death involving much Katy Perry and Lady Gaga.”
“Relax, little monster, we’re almost there.” David said, holding onto Kurt so he wouldn’t run into anything. They opened the door to the rehearsal room and walked Kurt to a couch. After making sure he was seated, James reached over and took off the blindfold. Kurt shook his head and instinctively smoothed his bangs. “Ok, you’re safe, my hair isn’t totally wrecked.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” James replied dryly, causing Kurt to smirk.
“Now, what is this about?” Kurt asked, leaning against the back of the couch and crossing his legs.
“Kurt, we like you. We really do. Almost to the point of love,” Wes started, and Kurt suppressed an eye roll. This is already awkward, Kurt thought. “So, we thought that we would have, you know, the talk with you.” This time, Kurt couldn’t hide the slight eye roll. But it was accompanied by a smile.
“I know the drill, guys. I hurt Blaine, you hurt me, and then I-” Hoite, the Warblers’ beat boxer, clamped a hand over Kurt’s mouth, the effect looking slightly hilarious, since Hoite’s hand was slightly bigger.
“Thank you, Hoite. Now, let me finish. We really like you, Kurt. We also really like Blaine. We love both of you like brothers, and it’s about damn time that you two start dating, because we were getting sick of the puppy-dog eyes, and-”
“Wes! Stay on topic. Remember, we role-played this.” David said, clapping a hand on Wes’ shoulder.
“Right. Anyway, even though we love Blaine, we know that Blaine is as oblivious as a blind person at a magic show. I know that you were expecting us to threaten you, but, on the contrary. We are threatening him. You are a wonderful guy, and we would love to keep you around. So, if Blaine does anything to hurt you, whether intentional or not, we will inflict harm upon him. But, since he’s our front man, and he has the dapper looks and charm that we need, we can’t actually mar him. So, we have a plan. If he does anything to you, anything at all that makes you the slightest bit uncomfortable, we will go into his room, take his Katy Perry CD’s and switch the disks out. Then, when he insists on playing Katy Perry while studying, which annoys his roommate, Chase,” Chase raised is hand, waving and smiling at Kurt, “he will instead get Cher’s Greatest Hits.”
Kurt gasped, “But he can’t stand Cher! He refused to see Burlesque with me!”
“Exactly. Now, the only thing Blaine knows is that we were having the talk with you. He doesn’t know what it’s actually about. You are not to tell him anything about this conversation,” Wes said, smiling and holding out his hand.
Kurt smiled genuinely and nodded, taking Wes’ offered hand. “Understood, my friend.” He laughed and stood up, hugging a few of the guys in the front and waving at the rest. The door knob rattled, and everyone froze. “Okay, guys, we drilled this. If it’s Blaine, Kurt, you act nervous, and the rest of us will act stern. Go!” David yelled, and everyone put their game faces on.
“Kiss me, k-k-kiss me,” Blaine sang as he opened the door. He stopped, looking at the gathered crowd of Warblers staring at Kurt. Kurt swallowed nervously and turned around.
“Oh, hey babe! The guys were just, uh, talking to me.” Kurt said, affecting a slight tremble. Wes rolled his eyes, and Kurt turned to look at him. Too much? he mouthed, and David snorted.
“Yeah, we were just having a friendly chat with Kurt here. We’re just going to go, so you continue with whatever you were going to do. Kurt,” Hoite said, turning to the younger boy and turning him around so they could look at each other, “Remember what Wes said, okay?” Hoite could barely suppress a smile, just like many of the Warblers.
“Will do, guys. Will do.” Kurt waved and grabbed Blaine’s hand. “Come on, babe, let’s go get some lunch.” Kurt gave the guys one last wave and smile before closing the door. Blaine let go of Kurt’s hand and moved behind him, wrapping both arms around Kurt’s waist. They both giggled as they tried to walk that way, but Blaine eventually tripped and stopped them, turning Kurt around.
“They didn’t give you too much of a hard time, did they?” Blaine asked, leaning in to rest his forehead against Kurt’s.
Kurt chuckled and smiled, giving Blaine a peck on the mouth. “No, they didn’t.”
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I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it, Cindy!!
Author: nerdyandromeda
Spoilers: Blissfully spoiler free!
Warnings: Just The Warblers being so awesome! And Wes talking a lot, haha!
A/N: So, this really won’t make sense unless you read this wonderful fic, The Talk, by the wonderful smash_leigh . After extensive fangirling in the comments, the also-wonderful pyro_semi suggested that The Warblers have a “talk” with Kurt. I fangirled, and offered to write it. She agreed, thus, our lovechild! Enjoy!
By the way, since not all of the Warblers have names, I made some up. This is a spur of the moment ficlet, so it is un-beta’d. All screwups are mine!
____________________________________________________________________________________
“Guys, what the hell are you doing?” Kurt huffed, latching onto Wes’ arm like he’s close to drowning. “ I can’t see anything because of this damn blindfold, and you tied it OVER MY BANGS. If my hair gets messed up, you will all suffer a painful death involving much Katy Perry and Lady Gaga.”
“Relax, little monster, we’re almost there.” David said, holding onto Kurt so he wouldn’t run into anything. They opened the door to the rehearsal room and walked Kurt to a couch. After making sure he was seated, James reached over and took off the blindfold. Kurt shook his head and instinctively smoothed his bangs. “Ok, you’re safe, my hair isn’t totally wrecked.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” James replied dryly, causing Kurt to smirk.
“Now, what is this about?” Kurt asked, leaning against the back of the couch and crossing his legs.
“Kurt, we like you. We really do. Almost to the point of love,” Wes started, and Kurt suppressed an eye roll. This is already awkward, Kurt thought. “So, we thought that we would have, you know, the talk with you.” This time, Kurt couldn’t hide the slight eye roll. But it was accompanied by a smile.
“I know the drill, guys. I hurt Blaine, you hurt me, and then I-” Hoite, the Warblers’ beat boxer, clamped a hand over Kurt’s mouth, the effect looking slightly hilarious, since Hoite’s hand was slightly bigger.
“Thank you, Hoite. Now, let me finish. We really like you, Kurt. We also really like Blaine. We love both of you like brothers, and it’s about damn time that you two start dating, because we were getting sick of the puppy-dog eyes, and-”
“Wes! Stay on topic. Remember, we role-played this.” David said, clapping a hand on Wes’ shoulder.
“Right. Anyway, even though we love Blaine, we know that Blaine is as oblivious as a blind person at a magic show. I know that you were expecting us to threaten you, but, on the contrary. We are threatening him. You are a wonderful guy, and we would love to keep you around. So, if Blaine does anything to hurt you, whether intentional or not, we will inflict harm upon him. But, since he’s our front man, and he has the dapper looks and charm that we need, we can’t actually mar him. So, we have a plan. If he does anything to you, anything at all that makes you the slightest bit uncomfortable, we will go into his room, take his Katy Perry CD’s and switch the disks out. Then, when he insists on playing Katy Perry while studying, which annoys his roommate, Chase,” Chase raised is hand, waving and smiling at Kurt, “he will instead get Cher’s Greatest Hits.”
Kurt gasped, “But he can’t stand Cher! He refused to see Burlesque with me!”
“Exactly. Now, the only thing Blaine knows is that we were having the talk with you. He doesn’t know what it’s actually about. You are not to tell him anything about this conversation,” Wes said, smiling and holding out his hand.
Kurt smiled genuinely and nodded, taking Wes’ offered hand. “Understood, my friend.” He laughed and stood up, hugging a few of the guys in the front and waving at the rest. The door knob rattled, and everyone froze. “Okay, guys, we drilled this. If it’s Blaine, Kurt, you act nervous, and the rest of us will act stern. Go!” David yelled, and everyone put their game faces on.
“Kiss me, k-k-kiss me,” Blaine sang as he opened the door. He stopped, looking at the gathered crowd of Warblers staring at Kurt. Kurt swallowed nervously and turned around.
“Oh, hey babe! The guys were just, uh, talking to me.” Kurt said, affecting a slight tremble. Wes rolled his eyes, and Kurt turned to look at him. Too much? he mouthed, and David snorted.
“Yeah, we were just having a friendly chat with Kurt here. We’re just going to go, so you continue with whatever you were going to do. Kurt,” Hoite said, turning to the younger boy and turning him around so they could look at each other, “Remember what Wes said, okay?” Hoite could barely suppress a smile, just like many of the Warblers.
“Will do, guys. Will do.” Kurt waved and grabbed Blaine’s hand. “Come on, babe, let’s go get some lunch.” Kurt gave the guys one last wave and smile before closing the door. Blaine let go of Kurt’s hand and moved behind him, wrapping both arms around Kurt’s waist. They both giggled as they tried to walk that way, but Blaine eventually tripped and stopped them, turning Kurt around.
“They didn’t give you too much of a hard time, did they?” Blaine asked, leaning in to rest his forehead against Kurt’s.
Kurt chuckled and smiled, giving Blaine a peck on the mouth. “No, they didn’t.”
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I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it, Cindy!!