permanon post.

[nerrin]

♛Leave me an anonymous comment pouring your heart out. Say anything. Tell me your stories, your secrets, those things no one ever asks but you wish to tell. Tell me about your love, your hate, your indifference, your joy. Tell me about what's inside of you when you're reading through these entries on your friends list, and tell me why you continue

Comments

[anonymous]

I'm stuck in a rut. Life is alright, but I just realised that I don't really like half of my so-called IRL best friends. They're terribly shallow and/or immature. I'm not even sure why we're friends in the first place, seeing as we lack common interests. I want to hate them but I can't. :/

[nerrin]

Firstly, I'm really sorry to hear that. ;__; /HUGS

I know that sort of feeling, I do feel some of my own friends are terribly superficial and materialistic but I still can't quit them because I love them despite that.
...But have these 'friends' of yours ever treated you unkindly? Even though they may be shallow and immature and your interests may differ...I don't think anyone should stop being friends with anyone else simply because of that.

If you can't hate them...I don't have the authority to say that it means you still treasure them as your 'friends', but there has to be a reason why you haven't given up on them. :)

[anonymous]

daw ;~; i feel bad now because i'm on your friends list...yet i hardly comment

One of them did treat me awfully, but the others have just been kind of insensitive. I haven't given up on them because they can be genuinely sweet, but they act like douchebags sometimes.

[nerrin]

No it's alright! I mean I have a really bad habit of disappearing for ages as well...(and obviously I don't comment during those phases so I am FOREVER GUILTY.)

I understand, friends like that - I'm not going to pass judgment for you, but since they can be nice people yet at the same time dickheads (I have friends like that right now, irl, and I'm still friends with them), I think maybe you should continue being friends with them.

Even though certain things people do can upset or frustrate you to no end...in the end if you genuinely love them as your friends, you wouldn't severe your friendships with them. 8D [On the other hand, if anything really does happen between you and any one of them and you feel that you really can't take their bullshit anymore...then you're free to choose for yourself what to do at that point.]

[anonymous]

I used to have a crush on you long ago m(._.)m

[nerrin]

.......

a-actually this comment made me really happy...thank you, anon. ♥
whoever you are, really, thank you. ;;

[anonymous]

i'm afraid of getting to the point again, where i convince myself no one likes me and i'm a bother to everyone, so i push everyone away and isolate myself. i can see myself going there, and i don't know what to do.

[nerrin]

Don't do that sort of thing to yourself.
Easier said than done, but don't ever think that - there are people who genuinely want to help, now that you've admitted this here I want to help you, so don't isolate yourself from your friends or family whor'e trying to reach out to you, don't push them away.

Even if I may live continents away from you and all I can do is tell you words over the Internet, I don't feel that doing this for you is a bother, and I am willing to do more if it is within my means to help you.

If you can see yourself heading in this direction and you're aware of it already - talk to the people around you about this, I honestly believe that we don't think you're a bother AT ALL, and most would probably have better advice and words to offer you than I do.

Heck, if you lived next door to me I would've ran over to give you a hug right about now. ;u;

[anonymous]

thank you...
I will try to gather the courage to talk to the people close to me about this. you are very sweet and kind.

[nerrin]

FFFF don't say that, it was really the least I could do.
I know gathering the courage to really TALK to people irl (it's terribly easy to break down when doing it, but still) is difficult, but you will feel a LOT better, like it's a lot off your shoulders!

I'm only glad I could do what I could to help. :) ♥

[anonymous]

I feel so far away from my IRL friends. I rarely see them (we live quite far apart) and I feel like they becoming more and more distant during the time we don't see each other. It hurts to know that the friendship I had with some of them is not gonna come back.

god i'm so lonely I don't know what to do with myself. .__. I feel like I'm going absolutely nowhere. There's a hole in my heart that waits to be filled.

Ner, let's talk someday for a long time, shall we? I'd like to see your IRL, even though you live so far, far, far away.

[nerrin]

Distance puts a lot of strain on any relationship...do you still keep in touch with them over the Internet? (But even then, I know it's still very depressing, because honestly sometimes people still grow further despite keeping in contact this way.)

Do you have any other irl friends that live closer to you, though? I'm not saying to use them as replacements or anything like that, but if you do make sure to treasure the time you guys have together. :) I'm not good at telling people how to fill gaps in their hearts, but I really hope that you'll be able to find a way to fill up that gap.

And me too, whoever you are -- I will meet you IRL one day, hug you, and then spend the entire day going everywhere with you and we'll have a lot of fun! \o/ Until then, I'll be hoping that this chance for either of us comes soon!

[anonymous]

It does, I know that too well. Yes, I keep in touch with them fairly regularly, see them like, 3-5 a year. More or less. I'm just kind of tired being the one who initiates the conversations usually .__. I'm not that talkative nor social, so talking to people is always scary, no matter how close we are.

Yes, there's this girl who lives in the same city, I should see her since she's the only one that lives pretty close to me. ;_; I just, the ones that I've grown close to, with whom I've been through so much pain and wonderful times, I miss them so much sometimes that it hurts, hurts, hurts, even though I should be happy about the fact that I even have friends, urgh.

I wish for that day to come :33 I really do.

[nerrin]

Yeah, I'm also really bad at talking to people online and initiating everything (especially on MSN) but I'm really glad you still keep in touch with them nonetheless. It's better than not talking at all because of distance and letting everything go.

Missing people you've went through a lot with is always painful, and especially so since you all are so far away, but one day I hope you'll be able to meet up with and catch up with all of them. Maybe plan for a day like this sometime?

Same here! ♥ I wanna be able to visit all my friends all over the world. 8D

[anonymous]

i miss talking to you more bb.

[nerrin]

Is that my fault, if so I am so sorry ;___;

I'd really liek to talk with everyone more, too! (Sometimes I don't really have the means to, or I really just plain suck at MSN convos...if you have a twitter, though, hit me up one day and we can catch up on all the times we missed!)

[anonymous]

it's not you, don't you worry. ♥ i don't have a twitter and i don't have your msn, but it's okay! i'm just glad we still talk sometimes.

[nerrin]

ahhh, if you want my MSN I could always just give it to you! 8D [it's writing_pirate@hotmail(dot)com...except that would mean...effectively de-anoning yourself /OTL??? - I'm also not online there a lot, sorry! ;;]

Same here, I'm really glad we still talk - though if you ever get Twitter, make a post about it, because I'm on there a lot and we can catch up!

BUT LET ME GIVE YOU A RANDOM CYBERHUG NOW K /HUGS ♥