Without you (2/??)
Title: Without you
Author:nerv_lambert
Rating: PG-13 (For language)
Summary: After Lea starts going out with Theo, Dianna has to face the rest of the cast and the world alone.
AN: Thank you so much for the comments, here's another chapter for you. :)
Ch.1
Later that day, Dianna laid on the couch back in her apartment trying to watch a reality show to get her mind off things. It worked for a while but then the show got depressing in the same kind of way her life was. She just turned off the TV and groaned in frustration why can’t I get over this STUPID crush? Thought Dianna.
She got up and turned on her laptop, signing into her tumblr. She hasn’t updated it since all of this drama started. She posted another video of a song that currently set her mood, which of course was emo and depressing. She kept looking at the re-blogs she’s been getting, people seemed to know what’s up even though none of them knew how she felt about Lea. The comments were so out there with no fear
Why so Emo Dianna? Lea giving you a hard time
Seems like Lea and Dianna have been fighting
Oh man, did Lea upset Dianna?
Most of the comments were like that. She hated it, not because people knew how she felt but because EVERYONE knows except for the only person she really needs them to know.
She sighed again and went to take a shower, maybe the water will wash off her problems and get that weight off her shoulders. She slid into bed after-wards and snuggled into the pillow, it smelled like Lea, that perfect scent of her, not the perfume she wears for the fans and other celebrities but the scent of her shampoo, it totally described Lea, fresh and bright.
Dianna couldn’t bring herself to fall asleep, even Lea’s scent wasn’t enough, she needed her there, physically, she needed her body close to hers once again, she needed to feel Lea’s arms around her making her feel safe and warm. Sure, those blankets would warm and bed up but they will never give her the warmth that Lea’s arms gave her.
She felt the apartment door open slowly and there was a sound of keys, her keys. She wondered why Lea would be back so soon.
Lea opened the door of the bedroom slowly, poking her head inside to see if Dianna’s still awake. Dianna tried to fake asleep but that didn’t get to Lea
“Di…” Lea barely whispered. Dianna just settled on her elbow and looked at Lea.
Lea made her way into the room slowly, sitting casually beside Dianna.
“Why are you back early?” Dianna tried to sound concerned about Lea’s date with Theo. She wasn’t though. She was happy that Lea was home early but she was worried at the same time. Lea’s face didn’t look alright, it wasn’t physically hurt or anything. It just didn’t seem like the “happy” Lea.
Lea looked down so Dianna couldn’t see her face properly “Theo had some work”. Oh god, not this tone. Thought Dianna. She knew that tone so well.
“Tell the truth now, I don’t like this tone”. Lea looked at her with a face that Dianna couldn’t quite read, she could tell she’s confused maybe hurt at the same time.
“Jenna told me…”. Told her? TOLD HER? About what? She’s so dead if she told her about what I think she did. Dianna looked at Lea “Told you about what?”
Lea looked seriously at Dianna now. Her face expressionless “She told me about what’s going on with you, Dianna”
Oh shit. That’s all Dianna could think of right now. She didn’t know what to say or do.
“I’m sorry…” Dianna managed to whisper those words weakly, still in shock that she has to deal with this now.
“You could have at least told me you don’t like him. You know I would have listened to you”. Dianna couldn’t look into Lea’s eyes, fearing of her expression. “No, I couldn’t. Your happiness is above mine when it comes to this”
Lea took a breath, trying to move forward into this conversation as calm as she can “Why don’t you like him?”
Wait. She doesn’t know the whole story? NOW THAT’S JUST PERFECT. Dianna’s mind was working like there’s no tomorrow trying to figure out what to say to Lea without ruining everything. She just figured if she told her the truth then she might be easy on her a little bit.
“…..I’m in love with you”. She could have sworn that she heard Lea cuss under her breath. Oh man, I just blew my chances. She was panicking. There was nothing to do now but wait for Lea’s answer.
“That’s wrong….”. There it was, the words which hit Dianna like a slap in the face. Lea didn’t love her. She didn’t. At that moment, Dianna did everything she can to not break down right there. This was too much to take.
“Not in my mind, Lea. I tried to fight this away. I couldn’t, do you have any idea what you do to me?” That’s it. She’s letting it all out no matter what happens. She’s going to be brave and step up this time.
“ No, I don’t….” that’s all Lea can manage to whisper.
Dianna looked straight into Lea’s eyes to find her looking back at her with concentration, like she’s analyzing every single word coming out of Dianna’s mouth.
“It’s insane what you do to me. I’ve never experienced this before. When you smile, you could light up my whole world even if it’s darker than ever. When you use that enthusiastic voice of yours, I feel like there’s nothing to worry about for the rest of my life. The way you just hold my hand and brush the back of it with your thumb, it drives me insane. The way you cling to my arm, it makes me feel that you feel safe with me, like you fit by my side so well. I can’t sleep unless your arms are wrapped around me, I feel so cold without them there. Ironic when we have all those blankets but they don’t warm me up like your arms do”
She concentrated on Lea’s eyes again, only to find tears streaming down her cheeks this time. She tried to reach out to wipe Lea’s tears but Lea just leaned away from her.
Lea let out a barely audible whisper “I…..I can’t”. Dianna sighed loudly this time “ Please, Lea. I need you”
Lea just got up “I can’t….do this…”, storming out of the room, leaving Dianna to cry herself to sleep.
Author:nerv_lambert
Rating: PG-13 (For language)
Summary: After Lea starts going out with Theo, Dianna has to face the rest of the cast and the world alone.
AN: Thank you so much for the comments, here's another chapter for you. :)
Ch.1
Later that day, Dianna laid on the couch back in her apartment trying to watch a reality show to get her mind off things. It worked for a while but then the show got depressing in the same kind of way her life was. She just turned off the TV and groaned in frustration why can’t I get over this STUPID crush? Thought Dianna.
She got up and turned on her laptop, signing into her tumblr. She hasn’t updated it since all of this drama started. She posted another video of a song that currently set her mood, which of course was emo and depressing. She kept looking at the re-blogs she’s been getting, people seemed to know what’s up even though none of them knew how she felt about Lea. The comments were so out there with no fear
Why so Emo Dianna? Lea giving you a hard time
Seems like Lea and Dianna have been fighting
Oh man, did Lea upset Dianna?
Most of the comments were like that. She hated it, not because people knew how she felt but because EVERYONE knows except for the only person she really needs them to know.
She sighed again and went to take a shower, maybe the water will wash off her problems and get that weight off her shoulders. She slid into bed after-wards and snuggled into the pillow, it smelled like Lea, that perfect scent of her, not the perfume she wears for the fans and other celebrities but the scent of her shampoo, it totally described Lea, fresh and bright.
Dianna couldn’t bring herself to fall asleep, even Lea’s scent wasn’t enough, she needed her there, physically, she needed her body close to hers once again, she needed to feel Lea’s arms around her making her feel safe and warm. Sure, those blankets would warm and bed up but they will never give her the warmth that Lea’s arms gave her.
She felt the apartment door open slowly and there was a sound of keys, her keys. She wondered why Lea would be back so soon.
Lea opened the door of the bedroom slowly, poking her head inside to see if Dianna’s still awake. Dianna tried to fake asleep but that didn’t get to Lea
“Di…” Lea barely whispered. Dianna just settled on her elbow and looked at Lea.
Lea made her way into the room slowly, sitting casually beside Dianna.
“Why are you back early?” Dianna tried to sound concerned about Lea’s date with Theo. She wasn’t though. She was happy that Lea was home early but she was worried at the same time. Lea’s face didn’t look alright, it wasn’t physically hurt or anything. It just didn’t seem like the “happy” Lea.
Lea looked down so Dianna couldn’t see her face properly “Theo had some work”. Oh god, not this tone. Thought Dianna. She knew that tone so well.
“Tell the truth now, I don’t like this tone”. Lea looked at her with a face that Dianna couldn’t quite read, she could tell she’s confused maybe hurt at the same time.
“Jenna told me…”. Told her? TOLD HER? About what? She’s so dead if she told her about what I think she did. Dianna looked at Lea “Told you about what?”
Lea looked seriously at Dianna now. Her face expressionless “She told me about what’s going on with you, Dianna”
Oh shit. That’s all Dianna could think of right now. She didn’t know what to say or do.
“I’m sorry…” Dianna managed to whisper those words weakly, still in shock that she has to deal with this now.
“You could have at least told me you don’t like him. You know I would have listened to you”. Dianna couldn’t look into Lea’s eyes, fearing of her expression. “No, I couldn’t. Your happiness is above mine when it comes to this”
Lea took a breath, trying to move forward into this conversation as calm as she can “Why don’t you like him?”
Wait. She doesn’t know the whole story? NOW THAT’S JUST PERFECT. Dianna’s mind was working like there’s no tomorrow trying to figure out what to say to Lea without ruining everything. She just figured if she told her the truth then she might be easy on her a little bit.
“…..I’m in love with you”. She could have sworn that she heard Lea cuss under her breath. Oh man, I just blew my chances. She was panicking. There was nothing to do now but wait for Lea’s answer.
“That’s wrong….”. There it was, the words which hit Dianna like a slap in the face. Lea didn’t love her. She didn’t. At that moment, Dianna did everything she can to not break down right there. This was too much to take.
“Not in my mind, Lea. I tried to fight this away. I couldn’t, do you have any idea what you do to me?” That’s it. She’s letting it all out no matter what happens. She’s going to be brave and step up this time.
“ No, I don’t….” that’s all Lea can manage to whisper.
Dianna looked straight into Lea’s eyes to find her looking back at her with concentration, like she’s analyzing every single word coming out of Dianna’s mouth.
“It’s insane what you do to me. I’ve never experienced this before. When you smile, you could light up my whole world even if it’s darker than ever. When you use that enthusiastic voice of yours, I feel like there’s nothing to worry about for the rest of my life. The way you just hold my hand and brush the back of it with your thumb, it drives me insane. The way you cling to my arm, it makes me feel that you feel safe with me, like you fit by my side so well. I can’t sleep unless your arms are wrapped around me, I feel so cold without them there. Ironic when we have all those blankets but they don’t warm me up like your arms do”
She concentrated on Lea’s eyes again, only to find tears streaming down her cheeks this time. She tried to reach out to wipe Lea’s tears but Lea just leaned away from her.
Lea let out a barely audible whisper “I…..I can’t”. Dianna sighed loudly this time “ Please, Lea. I need you”
Lea just got up “I can’t….do this…”, storming out of the room, leaving Dianna to cry herself to sleep.