Noblesse oblige (1)

[netpositive]

noblesse oblige [féminin]

1. Quiconque prétend être noble doit
se conduire noblement.
2. On doit agir en conformité
avec la situation qu’on occupe,
avec la réputation qu’on s’est acquise.
Dictionnaire de l’Académie française

So I've been pondering this concept a lot recently.

On Noblesse Oblige, or, Having An Inner Uncle Ben

I've always prided myself that I would take on any job
which I felt I had some skill or talent for, and would
do my best at it. I also pride myself on having advanced
through life via a combination of applied intelligence,
efficient social engineering, and, well, sheer dumb luck.

(Don't knock luck. Or it is likely to knock you back!)

Recently, I have been feeling rather overwhelmed by
the number and types of my various commitments, and
considering my own... peculiar versions of the common
fantasy where one just "gets away from it all". Even
in this I'm too darn practical; I don't dream of taking
up painting and South Sea islands, nor do I envision
some sort of neverending resort stay with good servants,
fine cuisine, and cost-free shopping. No, I am nothing
if not an extreme balancer. My dream job right now is
to be...

... a bus driver at Lisbon International Airport.
Or a delivery courier, traveling around Japan.
Or a backroom clerk at a store in southern France.

Or several other such things, but essentially
something that includes immersion in (relative)
cultural isolation while performing a useful (but
reasonably routine) job which leaves me some room for
other (undefined yet, but hopefully enjoyable) things.

Hmm. I'm not a grand traveller and I bore easily,
so why does this seem an attractive alternative?

Just then, a little voice inside my head said:

"You're not allowed to take a lesser job just because
you want to."

Huh? Where did *that* come from?

Noblesse oblige in modern English parlance is a
broad literary concept. It suggests that anyone
who possesses special talents or gifts is required
by society to make the best use of those gifts;
that he or she is duty-bound to do his or her best.
David R. Murray

Where I Come From (No, Not From France)

I'm from somewhere southeast of the middle of nowhere,
as white-bread American as you can get and still read a lot.
I didn't grow up miles from anyone else, but many times
I might as well have been. I semble normal, but I never
quite fit -- except with my dad, who is better than I am.
(And from whom I get my love for words and of language,
be they foreign or native.)

My forebears raised themselves up from tenant-farming and
railroads and uncertain heritage to become businessmen
and teachers and solid members of their local communities.
I never questioned that.

It wasn't expected that I would go to a fancy college. But
there was an unspoken assumption that I should go to college.
I never questioned that.

It wasn't expected that I would marry Prince Charming. If
anything, it was clear I was supposed to be my own rescuer.
I never questioned that.

I made decisions that put me financially on my own at 19, and
I worked a number of part-time student jobs to make ends meet.
I never regretted that.

I started at a bottom rung on a ladder. Worked my way up some,
went to grad school, then jumped to a different ladder. Worked
my way up some more, wandered sideways some through my interests
and my skill set, then jumped to another ladder. Worked my way
up some more, had a lot of help, gave some of that help back,
and jumped to a different ladder. Worked with brilliant mentors,
learned a lot (including more about what all I didn't know yet),
but found I needed some security and stability at that point,
and so jumped back to a similar rung on a similar -- but perhaps
narrower -- ladder.

Which brings me to where I hang on today, in a skin that does not
fit me ill for now... but feels more uncomfortable than usual.

I was brought up to believe that
the only thing worth doing was to add
to the sum of accurate information
in the world.
-Margaret Mead

Life: The Ultimate Reality Competition?

I've been incredibly lucky that the kind of things
I do well are important and valued in today's world.
At the same time, I've tried to take good advantage
of opportunities... without taking advantage of people.

I'm very competitive. If I actually do something,
I want to win... but not at someone else's expense.
So I would rather cooperate and contribute to overall
success, while defining my own "victory conditions".

I honestly don't think of myself as very ambitious.
I'm not much excited by a grander title, a fancier
office, or shiny but ultimately uncomfortable shoes.

Nevertheless, here I am, at least somewhat "higher up"
than where I started. Overall, I like who I am and
what I am doing. I realize I am very fortunate, and
I know others who are not. I do share what I can, but
what can one share with me in return?

Anyway. I think I need to get away some more. In ways
which make sense for me, if maybe not for anyone else.
I will acknowledge and accept help (if offered) -- but
it's still me I'm first responsible for.

How did making one's life easier become so complicated?

Starting [something new] has to work at this time
in your life.... Every decision to work on [the project]
is a decision to NOT do something else.For those of us
who have a life: family they enjoy, a house that needs repair,
cooking, washing dishes, etc., life is the real competition.
A single person eating take out in an apartment is a
better situation.
Stephen Turbek

On Values, Being Fairly Valued, and Being Fair

But meanwhile, that little voice is still pronouncing:

"You're not allowed to take a lesser job just because
you want to."

Well, I'm not quite sure who that voice is, but I'm sure
hearing it! Still trying to figure out what it means, but
also if it really has my best interests at heart or not...

Because not all the voices in one's head are good ones,
you know.
(to be continued...)

Happiness is that state of consciousness which
proceeds from the achievement of one's values.
-Ayn Rand