prompt request for Ingenious Inc.
ingenius_inc requested this prompt: "No, seriously, it followed me home and won't leave."
She writes some of the most beautiful poetic stories I've ever had the privilege to beta. If you aren't familiar with her work, stop right here and look at some of her NCIS stories, such as Issues With Confined Spaces And Rococo Lamps and Dead marine, Gibbs… Bruised knees, New job (or, How Tony Thinks He Got His Job).
So what do I write for her? A hopefully humorous dialogue story.
Title: The Mid-Life Crisis Affair
Author: Periwinkle
Word Count: ~ 300
Genre: Slash
Permission to archive: Check with me first.
Disclaimer: This is work of fanfiction and is not for profit.
The Mid-Life Crisis Affair
by Periwinkle
“Napoleon, please tell me you are not having another mid-life crisis.”
“I am not mid-life. Today is merely my 45th birthday. Which is not mid-life. And what do you mean by 'another one'?”
“When you were 41, you decided your wardrobe wasn’t ‘youthful’ enough and bought all those tie-dye shirts that we now use for dust rags. At 44, you decided to take up hang-gliding, missed the cliff’s jump-off point and broke both arms. This year you are 45...”
”I swear to you, I did not do this! I just looked and there it was at our home.”
“Napoleon, fire engine red MG MGB MK IV Roadsters do not just appear like magic. It requires human intervention.”
"No, seriously, it followed me home and won’t leave."
“Followed you home? As in someone followed you down the street driving it while you walked home?”
“Of course not! I had nothing to do with it, I swear!”
“Then why do we have it in our driveway? Just how hard did you work at making it leave? For that matter, when did you start talking to automobiles?”
“You’re asking me?”
“Is anyone else here talking to me?”
“That was meant to be rhetorical, you smartass Russian.”
“I believe you have an extra three letters there. It’s ‘smart Russian.’”
“I stand by my version.”
“No, you are standing by the car.”
“Now I know what I really want for my birthday.”
“Yes, Pasha?”
“To strangle you.”
“That would put a crimp in the nocturnal activities I had planned.”
“I’ll strangle you in the morning then.”
“Not after I’m done with you tonight.”
“Illya, I’m telling the truth. I was walking home and I saw the MG parked at the drugstore six blocks away. Then I turned the corner and there it was at our house. It just appeared, like magic.”
“Magic?”
“Like a gift from the Gods. Wait a minute… why are you smiling?”
“No one has ever called me a God before. Happy birthday, lyubov.”