Fan Fiction: Hajimete no Chuu
Title: Hajimete no Chuu
Pairing: TakuGoro
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me
A smapXsmap set triggers a memory for Kimura and Goro.
Hajimete no Chuu
It was like trying to remember a dream - this nameless feeling. What could it have to do with this set - a double futon he was to share in a skit about salary men traveling overnight? Goro sat a few centimeters away from him, examining his hair. Nothing unusual about that. Nothing to stir up a memory.
Now there was a problem. Just a few minutes staff was saying. Just remain on set. The futon felt good. Kimura lay down and shut his eyes. How long had it been since he’d slept on a futon? Surprisingly Goro did not begin chatting to him as he usually did. Did he leave? Kimura opened one eye and saw his fellow member sitting, staring straight ahead. Must be concentrating. He’s like that before a take.
Again, that feeling… What was it, this out of reach memory, this sensation of warmth and comfort clinging to him like another skin? And then quite suddenly he knew. It was the double futon, of course. But where? Where had they been? Takayama? Why were they in Takayama? Kimura liked to think he had an excellent memory but so much of what they’d done in those early days; where they’d gone, much less why, was all one generic exercise in the training camp for their future lives. Or maybe like Nakai he was just getting old.
Takayama. Double futon. He and Goro sharing a room, sharing a big futon. How old were they? Fourteen? Fifteen? They couldn’t sleep. Well, Goro couldn’t anyway.
Goro
Kimura Kun?
Kimura
Huh?
Goro
How many girls have you kissed?
Kimura
Eh?
Goro had leaned up on one elbow looking toward Kimura, his face full of the enthusiasm he usually saved for waving to family and friends while on camera.
Goro
Just approximately. I know it must be a lot.
Kimura
Well…
Goro
Do you have a favorite?
Kimura had started to laugh.
Kimura
How many girls have you kissed?
Goro had laid back down.
Goro
Me?… I…
Kimura leaned up on one elbow facing Goro. He had found something to interest him - teasing Goro chan.
Kimura
I knew it! I knew it! No girls for Goro chan!
Goro
That’s just what you think.
Kimura
Ok, then. Who are they? What are their names?
Goro
I’m not telling!
Kimura
Because there are none! Ha!
Victorious, Kimura had laid back down.
Kimura
You probably don’t even know how to kiss.
Goro
That’s not true!
Kimura
That’s what you say.
Kimura had begun laughing to himself. Teasing Goro was fun but it was almost too easy. He had wondered how long the boy would continue arguing with him.
Goro
You don’t know!
Kimura
Oh, I know.
Nothing more from Goro? Just when it was getting to be fun, too.
Goro
Kimura kun?
Kimura
What?
Goro
Nothing…
I’ll show you nothing.
Kimura had leaned up and directly over Goro. He knew Goro could feel his breath. Good.
Kimura
I don’t think you’ve kissed anybody ever!
Goro had looked up at Kimura not frightened but wary. That’s right, look me in the eye, Goro chan.
Before either were aware of it; without thought; without warning Kimura’s lips touched Goro’s. Kimura had pulled away from the younger boy, smiling, jubilant.
Kimura
I knew it! I said so!
Goro had stared up at Kimura bewildered. Kimura had waited for him to speak but he had said nothing. Kimura’s smile faded for a moment and then had returned wider than ever. He had leaned into Goro again and this time had pressed his lips harder to the other boy’s; his tongue sliding it’s way into his mouth.
Kimura had not thought Goro might resist him because he was not thinking at all. A switch had been flipped. He was only movement; raw spontaneous action, seeking something that he could not name. After a moment Goro had also begun to act; moving his tongue in a rhythm to match Kimura’s.
They had stopped to take a breath and then as one they began again; Goro kissing Kimura as no girl ever had. Truth was he had not kissed that many girls, but there was something different about Goro. Not just that he was a boy. There was something so much sweeter, more delicious about his mouth and his tongue. This was as much reflection as Kimura could have given. That wave had been all about feeling and feeling good - very, very good. His hands felt for Goro’s hair. Goro gently held Kimura’s waist on either side.
He couldn’t remember how long they’d stayed that way. His sense of time had been lost along with all other rational thought. He did remember waking up with Goro’s head against his chest.
It made him want to laugh out loud - this crazy, adolescent episode. It never happened again. They never spoke of it. Kimura had no desire for it to happen again and that made him want to laugh, too. He wasn’t gay and he certainly wasn’t in love with Goro chan. He giggled involuntarily at the idea.
Kimura opened his eyes. The staff were still busily preparing the shot. Goro, thirty-eight year old Goro, still sat, deep in thought. Kimura couldn’t help but smile. And then Goro chan turned and sweetly returned his smile.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
A double futon. Had the script mentioned it? He would surely have remembered if it had. Goro felt as if he was walking in sand, his feet heavy and unsteady. He paused when he saw Kimura approaching the futon from the opposite side and then he forced himself with an effort to move again.
Oh, no, was Kimura kun lying down now? Professional. Be professional, Goro. Kimura kun probably doesn’t remember a thing. He’s just resting before the take. Just get into position, check your hair, review your lines.
The mirror was in front of him but Goro saw nothing. When it was gone he glanced quickly to the side. Kimura was lying peacefully, his eyes shut. Was he actually sleeping? Goro could feel the steady beat of his heart. But was it really so serious? It was after all just a distant memory, a far away place.
Takayama. He remembered it quite well - the tiny room with the big futon, the vague smell of boiled vegetables all their small town accommodation at the time had had. He was fourteen and had been happy to share a room with Kimura. Kimura kun had scolded less and encouraged more. Of course the other boys admired Kimura, too, but Goro liked to think that his feelings for Kimura kun were superior to theirs. More than Kimura’s talent, good looks and ability to make everything he did seem cool, Goro admired Kimura kun as a person. He just wanted to be around him. It was that simple or at least he had thought it was simple. And that night was a great opportunity!
Goro
Kimura kun must have kissed a lot of girls.
Kimura
I guess so.
Goro
Who was the best one?
Kimura
Eh?
Goro
Out of all the girls you’ve kissed who was the best?
Kimura
Why are you asking me this?
Goro
Just curious…
Kimura had leaned up on one elbow, facing Goro.
Kimura
It’s because you’ve never kissed anyone!
Goro
No, that’s not it…
Kimura
It is, too. Goro chan’s never had a girlfriend!
Goro
Stop it!
Kimura
Ok. How many girls have you kissed then?
Goro
Me? Well, I…
Kimura
Yeah…?
Goro
I’m thinking…
Kimura had laid back down and then in one swift movement he was up, leaning directly over Goro.
Kimura
I don’t think you’ve kissed anyone ever!
Kimura’s smile had grown wider and somehow wilder. Goro had suspected he was going to tease him some more. He didn’t like that but… But Kimura had said nothing and instead leaned closer to him until his lips were pressed against Goro’s.
It was only a millisecond but Goro felt his heart had been pounding for hours. He had been breathless and confused but not in the least frightened. Kimura had begun to giggle and then smile again. And then his smile had been replaced by an expression Goro had seen before when Kimura was coming up with an idea, usually an idea for a prank to play on him or one of the other boys.
And then again Kimura had leaned towards Goro, his mouth pressed hard against the younger boy’s, his tongue insinuating itself inside. Somehow, without knowing how, Goro had understood and naturally responded to Kimura’s long, curious, furious tongue, meeting it wherever it went.
They had broken apart, taken a breath and then as one they had begun kissing again. Goro had felt this the most rapturous moment of his life to that point. He had, indeed, never kissed a girl and he wasn’t sure if this was right or wrong, or if he was gay, or even if he were in love with Kimura kun. He only knew he had never wanted to stop feeling Kimura’s mouth on his own. He never wanted to stop feeling so close to someone he admired so much.
Goro remembered they had stayed that way for hours, enjoying themselves, enjoying each other; Kimura’s hands in his hair, his own on the older boy’s waist. Goro had woken first, his face buried in Kimura’s chest. He had shut his eyes and feigned sleep until Kimura woke and moved away.
Sitting on the double futon, this smapXsmap prop, Goro could feel the warmth of that memory comforting him once more. It had never happened again and they had never spoken of it, but Goro could never forget his first kiss. He looked over towards Kimura who was smiling sweetly and returned his smile.
Pairing: TakuGoro
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me
A smapXsmap set triggers a memory for Kimura and Goro.
Hajimete no Chuu
It was like trying to remember a dream - this nameless feeling. What could it have to do with this set - a double futon he was to share in a skit about salary men traveling overnight? Goro sat a few centimeters away from him, examining his hair. Nothing unusual about that. Nothing to stir up a memory.
Now there was a problem. Just a few minutes staff was saying. Just remain on set. The futon felt good. Kimura lay down and shut his eyes. How long had it been since he’d slept on a futon? Surprisingly Goro did not begin chatting to him as he usually did. Did he leave? Kimura opened one eye and saw his fellow member sitting, staring straight ahead. Must be concentrating. He’s like that before a take.
Again, that feeling… What was it, this out of reach memory, this sensation of warmth and comfort clinging to him like another skin? And then quite suddenly he knew. It was the double futon, of course. But where? Where had they been? Takayama? Why were they in Takayama? Kimura liked to think he had an excellent memory but so much of what they’d done in those early days; where they’d gone, much less why, was all one generic exercise in the training camp for their future lives. Or maybe like Nakai he was just getting old.
Takayama. Double futon. He and Goro sharing a room, sharing a big futon. How old were they? Fourteen? Fifteen? They couldn’t sleep. Well, Goro couldn’t anyway.
Goro
Kimura Kun?
Kimura
Huh?
Goro
How many girls have you kissed?
Kimura
Eh?
Goro had leaned up on one elbow looking toward Kimura, his face full of the enthusiasm he usually saved for waving to family and friends while on camera.
Goro
Just approximately. I know it must be a lot.
Kimura
Well…
Goro
Do you have a favorite?
Kimura had started to laugh.
Kimura
How many girls have you kissed?
Goro had laid back down.
Goro
Me?… I…
Kimura leaned up on one elbow facing Goro. He had found something to interest him - teasing Goro chan.
Kimura
I knew it! I knew it! No girls for Goro chan!
Goro
That’s just what you think.
Kimura
Ok, then. Who are they? What are their names?
Goro
I’m not telling!
Kimura
Because there are none! Ha!
Victorious, Kimura had laid back down.
Kimura
You probably don’t even know how to kiss.
Goro
That’s not true!
Kimura
That’s what you say.
Kimura had begun laughing to himself. Teasing Goro was fun but it was almost too easy. He had wondered how long the boy would continue arguing with him.
Goro
You don’t know!
Kimura
Oh, I know.
Nothing more from Goro? Just when it was getting to be fun, too.
Goro
Kimura kun?
Kimura
What?
Goro
Nothing…
I’ll show you nothing.
Kimura had leaned up and directly over Goro. He knew Goro could feel his breath. Good.
Kimura
I don’t think you’ve kissed anybody ever!
Goro had looked up at Kimura not frightened but wary. That’s right, look me in the eye, Goro chan.
Before either were aware of it; without thought; without warning Kimura’s lips touched Goro’s. Kimura had pulled away from the younger boy, smiling, jubilant.
Kimura
I knew it! I said so!
Goro had stared up at Kimura bewildered. Kimura had waited for him to speak but he had said nothing. Kimura’s smile faded for a moment and then had returned wider than ever. He had leaned into Goro again and this time had pressed his lips harder to the other boy’s; his tongue sliding it’s way into his mouth.
Kimura had not thought Goro might resist him because he was not thinking at all. A switch had been flipped. He was only movement; raw spontaneous action, seeking something that he could not name. After a moment Goro had also begun to act; moving his tongue in a rhythm to match Kimura’s.
They had stopped to take a breath and then as one they began again; Goro kissing Kimura as no girl ever had. Truth was he had not kissed that many girls, but there was something different about Goro. Not just that he was a boy. There was something so much sweeter, more delicious about his mouth and his tongue. This was as much reflection as Kimura could have given. That wave had been all about feeling and feeling good - very, very good. His hands felt for Goro’s hair. Goro gently held Kimura’s waist on either side.
He couldn’t remember how long they’d stayed that way. His sense of time had been lost along with all other rational thought. He did remember waking up with Goro’s head against his chest.
It made him want to laugh out loud - this crazy, adolescent episode. It never happened again. They never spoke of it. Kimura had no desire for it to happen again and that made him want to laugh, too. He wasn’t gay and he certainly wasn’t in love with Goro chan. He giggled involuntarily at the idea.
Kimura opened his eyes. The staff were still busily preparing the shot. Goro, thirty-eight year old Goro, still sat, deep in thought. Kimura couldn’t help but smile. And then Goro chan turned and sweetly returned his smile.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
A double futon. Had the script mentioned it? He would surely have remembered if it had. Goro felt as if he was walking in sand, his feet heavy and unsteady. He paused when he saw Kimura approaching the futon from the opposite side and then he forced himself with an effort to move again.
Oh, no, was Kimura kun lying down now? Professional. Be professional, Goro. Kimura kun probably doesn’t remember a thing. He’s just resting before the take. Just get into position, check your hair, review your lines.
The mirror was in front of him but Goro saw nothing. When it was gone he glanced quickly to the side. Kimura was lying peacefully, his eyes shut. Was he actually sleeping? Goro could feel the steady beat of his heart. But was it really so serious? It was after all just a distant memory, a far away place.
Takayama. He remembered it quite well - the tiny room with the big futon, the vague smell of boiled vegetables all their small town accommodation at the time had had. He was fourteen and had been happy to share a room with Kimura. Kimura kun had scolded less and encouraged more. Of course the other boys admired Kimura, too, but Goro liked to think that his feelings for Kimura kun were superior to theirs. More than Kimura’s talent, good looks and ability to make everything he did seem cool, Goro admired Kimura kun as a person. He just wanted to be around him. It was that simple or at least he had thought it was simple. And that night was a great opportunity!
Goro
Kimura kun must have kissed a lot of girls.
Kimura
I guess so.
Goro
Who was the best one?
Kimura
Eh?
Goro
Out of all the girls you’ve kissed who was the best?
Kimura
Why are you asking me this?
Goro
Just curious…
Kimura had leaned up on one elbow, facing Goro.
Kimura
It’s because you’ve never kissed anyone!
Goro
No, that’s not it…
Kimura
It is, too. Goro chan’s never had a girlfriend!
Goro
Stop it!
Kimura
Ok. How many girls have you kissed then?
Goro
Me? Well, I…
Kimura
Yeah…?
Goro
I’m thinking…
Kimura had laid back down and then in one swift movement he was up, leaning directly over Goro.
Kimura
I don’t think you’ve kissed anyone ever!
Kimura’s smile had grown wider and somehow wilder. Goro had suspected he was going to tease him some more. He didn’t like that but… But Kimura had said nothing and instead leaned closer to him until his lips were pressed against Goro’s.
It was only a millisecond but Goro felt his heart had been pounding for hours. He had been breathless and confused but not in the least frightened. Kimura had begun to giggle and then smile again. And then his smile had been replaced by an expression Goro had seen before when Kimura was coming up with an idea, usually an idea for a prank to play on him or one of the other boys.
And then again Kimura had leaned towards Goro, his mouth pressed hard against the younger boy’s, his tongue insinuating itself inside. Somehow, without knowing how, Goro had understood and naturally responded to Kimura’s long, curious, furious tongue, meeting it wherever it went.
They had broken apart, taken a breath and then as one they had begun kissing again. Goro had felt this the most rapturous moment of his life to that point. He had, indeed, never kissed a girl and he wasn’t sure if this was right or wrong, or if he was gay, or even if he were in love with Kimura kun. He only knew he had never wanted to stop feeling Kimura’s mouth on his own. He never wanted to stop feeling so close to someone he admired so much.
Goro remembered they had stayed that way for hours, enjoying themselves, enjoying each other; Kimura’s hands in his hair, his own on the older boy’s waist. Goro had woken first, his face buried in Kimura’s chest. He had shut his eyes and feigned sleep until Kimura woke and moved away.
Sitting on the double futon, this smapXsmap prop, Goro could feel the warmth of that memory comforting him once more. It had never happened again and they had never spoken of it, but Goro could never forget his first kiss. He looked over towards Kimura who was smiling sweetly and returned his smile.