Rustle these leaves, ruffle these feathers
This is the journey of how I've been slowly learning to let go of things I shouldn't really feel too attached to.
It started a few years back - in 2008? Some might remember my red Nokia phone and how my life events were stored in my calendar. Not even kidding. Birthdays, dates, exams, meetups, appointments, reminders to do stuff - all stored in my calendar. Then one day I stupidly deleted ALL EVENTS off the face of the earth. First time ever I felt so lost cause I had no clue what I had on for the next few months anymore. I remember sitting in shock & devastation for awhile.
Some people might have noticed that I've been v. good this year & I've made a timetable everyday on a piece of paper I fold and keep in my wallet - an hourly schedule of what I've to do. It keeps me disciplined and on track hahaha. When I lost my first paper last month I was very disorientated for a few days haha.
Next, gosh, my phoneeees. My iphone spoilt (possibly due to a car rolling over it) and my silver Nokia very elusively, mysteriously got lost. All my photos, NOTES, schedule - gone! And you know how a big part of your life is in your phone right? Or to do with your phone, like activities and stuff. I had to deal with not doing some activities so frequently anymore.
Actually, even in having my silver Nokia I was learning to let go already. That phone had so little memory that I'm only able to keep ~140 messages in my inbox at any one time. At first I painstakingly deleted message by message when I wanted to make space for more messages; reading each one and trying to retain the nice messages. Being !sentimental and all. But after a while I became a seasoned pro, okay. "Memory nearly full" "Delete all messages"
What I've learnt from all this:
From losing my calendar, my schedule, my phones, I think the biggest lesson has been learning to move on. Not dwelling on the sadness/unfairness/how unfortunate it is, but telling myself, "It's okay, you can't do anything about it. Let's go." Yup, I would say that after all this I find it easier to let go and move on. (Life skill!)
Yeah God has a plan for everything!! When I lost my silver Nokia phone, I didn't have a replacement for exactly 3 weeks. So I had no phone during this time. It was actually a really fun 3 weeks. You know, on one hand though it was kinda v. troublesome for me to contact people and vice versa, it felt so carefree, and less burdensome. And I got to talk to God more, spend more time with him. (: Sometimes though I feel so lost without my phone, I tell God to help me AND THEN I KNOW IT'S POSSIBLE AND I CAN DO IT. Helps me be more dependent on God. (:
And now, confession: my latest lost item - my wallet. I left it on 156 Monday morning. Have you ever felt what it's like to watch a vehicle move away with your possession inside, thinking of the repercussions and then thinking that your wallet's so near yet............... and feeling really helpless. Yeah. My mind was tumbling & tumbling & tumbling. The only reason I got through class and seemed quite normal was because before morning assembly I prayed a short, desperate, heartfelt prayer, saying that I'll trust God to make everything alright in the end. I really had so much faith that I'd get back my wallet. I resolved that I was going to really depend on God so I wasn't going to share, or rather, project my woes onto people. God was going to be my main comforter. So I was just so strongly assured.
Later on though, I started to worry. Worry worry worrywart about telling my parents, the trouble I'd have to go to to replace my cards!, worry about someone possibly using my debit card to pay for things!!! It was so stressful sigh. But during quiet time I read Matthew 6:25-34 and God reminded me that he'll take care of me because every plan is his. And so I surrendered all my worries, burdens to God. I have faith that because God's got this (& he makes all things work together for my good) things can't go all that wrong - I embrace whatever I'm taught from this!
God's taught me a lot from all these happenings in my life. (:
The silver lining behind every dark cloud.
It started a few years back - in 2008? Some might remember my red Nokia phone and how my life events were stored in my calendar. Not even kidding. Birthdays, dates, exams, meetups, appointments, reminders to do stuff - all stored in my calendar. Then one day I stupidly deleted ALL EVENTS off the face of the earth. First time ever I felt so lost cause I had no clue what I had on for the next few months anymore. I remember sitting in shock & devastation for awhile.
Some people might have noticed that I've been v. good this year & I've made a timetable everyday on a piece of paper I fold and keep in my wallet - an hourly schedule of what I've to do. It keeps me disciplined and on track hahaha. When I lost my first paper last month I was very disorientated for a few days haha.
Next, gosh, my phoneeees. My iphone spoilt (possibly due to a car rolling over it) and my silver Nokia very elusively, mysteriously got lost. All my photos, NOTES, schedule - gone! And you know how a big part of your life is in your phone right? Or to do with your phone, like activities and stuff. I had to deal with not doing some activities so frequently anymore.
Actually, even in having my silver Nokia I was learning to let go already. That phone had so little memory that I'm only able to keep ~140 messages in my inbox at any one time. At first I painstakingly deleted message by message when I wanted to make space for more messages; reading each one and trying to retain the nice messages. Being !sentimental and all. But after a while I became a seasoned pro, okay. "Memory nearly full" "Delete all messages"
What I've learnt from all this:
From losing my calendar, my schedule, my phones, I think the biggest lesson has been learning to move on. Not dwelling on the sadness/unfairness/how unfortunate it is, but telling myself, "It's okay, you can't do anything about it. Let's go." Yup, I would say that after all this I find it easier to let go and move on. (Life skill!)
Yeah God has a plan for everything!! When I lost my silver Nokia phone, I didn't have a replacement for exactly 3 weeks. So I had no phone during this time. It was actually a really fun 3 weeks. You know, on one hand though it was kinda v. troublesome for me to contact people and vice versa, it felt so carefree, and less burdensome. And I got to talk to God more, spend more time with him. (: Sometimes though I feel so lost without my phone, I tell God to help me AND THEN I KNOW IT'S POSSIBLE AND I CAN DO IT. Helps me be more dependent on God. (:
And now, confession: my latest lost item - my wallet. I left it on 156 Monday morning. Have you ever felt what it's like to watch a vehicle move away with your possession inside, thinking of the repercussions and then thinking that your wallet's so near yet............... and feeling really helpless. Yeah. My mind was tumbling & tumbling & tumbling. The only reason I got through class and seemed quite normal was because before morning assembly I prayed a short, desperate, heartfelt prayer, saying that I'll trust God to make everything alright in the end. I really had so much faith that I'd get back my wallet. I resolved that I was going to really depend on God so I wasn't going to share, or rather, project my woes onto people. God was going to be my main comforter. So I was just so strongly assured.
Later on though, I started to worry. Worry worry worrywart about telling my parents, the trouble I'd have to go to to replace my cards!, worry about someone possibly using my debit card to pay for things!!! It was so stressful sigh. But during quiet time I read Matthew 6:25-34 and God reminded me that he'll take care of me because every plan is his. And so I surrendered all my worries, burdens to God. I have faith that because God's got this (& he makes all things work together for my good) things can't go all that wrong - I embrace whatever I'm taught from this!
God's taught me a lot from all these happenings in my life. (:
The silver lining behind every dark cloud.