If i had one wish i'd wish that Mike DeWolfe would fall off the face of this earth

[nickool]

God, where do i start? first off he is the worst person i ever met in MY LIFE, and i've met some pretty bad people. When he talks to me it's like knives jabbing into my brain. Everytime he even looks at me my body starts to feel as if it is bursting into blisters. He tells these horrid jokes, and sometimes i just laugh to pity him, maybe i

Comments

Next Stop: Nickoletown, USA!

[nickole4eva]

I tell ya, now that that DeWolfe kid is out of the picture, I'm moving in for the kill. If I want to win affections, all I have to do is be less lame than Mike. Which shouldn't be too difficult since I've seen flaming piles of horse carcasses covered in lizard dung less lame than that kid.

[biblioklept]

I heard he owns a cat. What a fucking doucheface.

Mike's a sick bastard

[reworded]

No, it's not a real cat. Or at least a live one. Mike has allergies and his parents wouldn't allow him to have any animals. I heard that when he was playing Skip-It in his driveway last summer someone accidentally ran over one of the neighbor's cats as they drove past his house. Mike scooped it up and wrapped it in a plastic bag and brought the dead beast to his freezer until it firmed up. I've heard from an outside source that Mike sneaks into his kitchen in the middle of the night when he can't sleep and take out the cat and strokes it until he falls asleep because it finds its' rigid, frigid, dander free, furry body comforting.

Re: Mike's a sick bastard

[nickool]

WE ALL HATE MIKE...this looks like a start to a new club...i think should be called "We hate everything Mike Dewolfe does" club. i'm glad everyone else in the world feels the same way.

Wicked homo

[biblioklept]

Did I mention he made out with my cousin Paul once? It was supposed to be an innocent ride home. Paul was young and impressionable so Mike decided to ram his tongue down his throat.