Chris has written a really good piece on what men can do to help combat misogyny hereI'd just like to add in a bit about why even confident and empowered women need allies
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Oh dear! Something that might be helpful though - the timing of comments. I know that for me when I'm upset someone refuting my point of view, just sounds like 'blah blah blah blah!' and I'm actually not receptive to listening at all until after I've cooled off or felt heard. So I wonder if in the above example the Timing of the comments was as important as Who said them. (having said that his reply is that awful maybe he is just a total idiot beyond redemption!) Anyway, timing does affect receptiveness I think. Also I wonder if 'repeating back counsellor style' would help - proving you've a. heard the comment and b. letting them hear what it sounds like? (I admit offering suggestions when I'm no good at this is silly, but I am interested in other people's points of view!)
Oh, in the case of my awful brother-in-law I repeatedly waited until he seemed calm before trying to address the issue.
Believe me, over the course of five months of somebody I'd previously liked and respected turning into Mr Shouty The Ranting Monster I tried every communication method and style apart from interpretive dance in an effort to get through to him and find my old friend under the monster he'd suddenly become.
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Something that might be helpful though - the timing of comments.
I know that for me when I'm upset someone refuting my point of view, just sounds like 'blah blah blah blah!' and I'm actually not receptive to listening at all until after I've cooled off or felt heard. So I wonder if in the above example the Timing of the comments was as important as Who said them.
(having said that his reply is that awful maybe he is just a total idiot beyond redemption!)
Anyway, timing does affect receptiveness I think.
Also I wonder if 'repeating back counsellor style' would help - proving you've a. heard the comment and b. letting them hear what it sounds like?
(I admit offering suggestions when I'm no good at this is silly, but I am interested in other people's points of view!)
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Believe me, over the course of five months of somebody I'd previously liked and respected turning into Mr Shouty The Ranting Monster I tried every communication method and style apart from interpretive dance in an effort to get through to him and find my old friend under the monster he'd suddenly become.
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