Re: ((action))nicotine_patchNovember 2 2010, 05:12:31 UTC
Shut up - shut the fuck up -
[it's not like he's stupid, it's not like he didn't know this would happen. it happened once already, for fuck's sake, because of the very man on top of him]
[it's all his fault, he knows that too. he dug the sliver in until it became unable to be removed, and then was surprised when it got infected]
[it doesn't mean Genkaku can fucking piss in the wound]
Re: ((action))prayforpreyNovember 2 2010, 05:54:12 UTC
[ "more persistent then a corpse", he'd said in the past. but who's persisting now? ]
[ he's holding that angry face still, raking a callused thumb down the side of a sharp jaw and to the throat that's tight with words that won't be said. ]
Y'know I'm the only one that's gonna be here for you.
[ the rough touch raises, bumps over snarling lips. ]
Who else you got left? S'just you an' me here in the dark.
Re: ((action))nicotine_patchNovember 2 2010, 06:41:58 UTC
[he's right. and because he's right, Badou very literally bites the hand that feeds him - who else is left to sink teeth into?]
[he wants space, wants to make that crushing tightness in his (heart? nah, his heart's just not squishy enough anymore) lungs to fucking ease up and he'll gnash canines down to the bone to get that respite if he has to]
[ (there's a smoke burning a hole in his pocket and it doesn't mean a goddamned thing) ]
Re: ((action))prayforpreyNovember 2 2010, 07:01:44 UTC
[ he's got more blood to lose, hasn't felt anemia crawl at him in three months. ]
Whatcha gonna hope for now?
[ Luke to come back? that a freezerpops douchebag will finally understand? the lost fuckin' cause Genkaku is? there's nothing left to buy and Badou wants to live stingy anyway. ]
[ the flesh of his hand only shivers, and he wonders if they'll scar as he watches saliva-slicked teeth gleam in the mire. ]
Re: ((action))prayforpreyNovember 2 2010, 10:31:47 UTC
[ he's always promised to make good on Badou's wounds. Luke didn't make this one, no -- his Wise Bird did. but every time someone drops in close and then gets ripped away, a little chip of the edge gets plucked off and infected. ]
[ to bring Badou closer to him, to bury him into himself as though he were the sliver, Genkaku will take his pain. ]
Only I can fit here.
[ in the unseeing, the only thing felt is a gasphuff of monk's heavy boiler breath on the other's chest, his body curled over where the knee had clipped him. his equally warm palm smears blood down fabric and plants a great, wet spot on over his heart that will be brown by the time they're finished here. ]
[ he murmurs en mantra; ]
It's mine. You're mine. This is mine.
[ ruined fingers find the parted, angry mouth and jam down past his tongue: a cog in the gears. ]
Re: ((action))nicotine_patchNovember 3 2010, 06:39:36 UTC
[as tattered fingers jam down his esophagus, panic rises up it, thick as bile - not for the physical, not for the ribcage Genkaku could easily break under that monstrous hand, if he felt like it]
[mine, mine, mine - what's the point of carving a space in someone if they just fucking leave later? why should he trust Genkaku not to get swept away? there'd been a reason Heine was his partner, because it was so easy to let Heine wander in and out of his life]
[you'll leave, he wants to choke out, and he's glad for the violation then, so that it stays unsaid except in the too-wideness of his eye. what if you leave, what if you get taken away, what if you fucking die like all the rest, you don't have to be a wisebird to get lost]
[Badou's good at running, but he's never been able to escape those swallowed cries of unfair, just let them snip away all traces of carewantcamaraderie from his heart, draining them from every interaction]
[when he gags on the blood in his throat, he's just so fucking relieved]
Re: ((action))prayforpreyNovember 3 2010, 09:04:01 UTC
[ with that body stilled underneath of him, the monk thinks about nothing but pain: how badly the gunslinger's hurting, how badly he wants to hurt him (as if to bring that inner anguish to a beautiful, bruising surface), how deeply he wants to carve into him until there's nothing left but brilliant scars on sallow skin. ]
[ his fingers twist and jam and jar, face-fucking digits deep into the mouth that wants to release and bite words and fears and questions. instead of answers, all he receives is a sweat-matted snake, slithering up the side of his neck and tasting as he went, blood and panic and adrenaline all on his tongue as it laps over angles of his jaw and the bumps black straps. ]
[ with the scar of his chest smashed onto the handprint he'd left behind and a guttural gutter growl into his ear, he's swearing off his own fears ("I'm confident you'll bail") to be caught up in that moment (now); ]
Re: ((action))nicotine_patchNovember 4 2010, 03:02:26 UTC
[the mania (belly-up vulnerability) passes.]
[the saliva on his neck cools, the words chipping the back of his molars recede, and the blood from Genkaku's ripped fingers is swallowed]
[his own hand finally comes up, junkie twitching but not trembling, not fight-or-flight fear]
[and with that marionette hand he wrenches the fingers out of his jaws (not without scraping knuckles and cracking nails), turns his head to the side, and croaks hoarsely;]
Re: ((action))prayforpreyNovember 4 2010, 03:18:12 UTC
[ there's a definitive pause at the question, but the shifting of fabric alerts that he does indeed. he rocks back on haunches, straddling one long thigh with a denim heat, matches flickering up by the means of torn fingers. a cast yellow light on his close-eyed, relaxed face for a moment flickers like a sulfur cloud in the darkness and he breathes in unseen pollution. ]
[ the embers of the cigarette trail back to the mattress between fingers, and the monk's jaw lowers on the undergrounder's, mouth parting mouth. the requested smoke is passed over with a rancid, seeking tongue; from one lung (life) to another. ]
Reply
[it's not like he's stupid, it's not like he didn't know this would happen. it happened once already, for fuck's sake, because of the very man on top of him]
[it's all his fault, he knows that too. he dug the sliver in until it became unable to be removed, and then was surprised when it got infected]
[it doesn't mean Genkaku can fucking piss in the wound]
Reply
[ he's holding that angry face still, raking a callused thumb down the side of a sharp jaw and to the throat that's tight with words that won't be said. ]
Y'know I'm the only one that's gonna be here for you.
[ the rough touch raises, bumps over snarling lips. ]
Who else you got left? S'just you an' me here in the dark.
Reply
[he wants space, wants to make that crushing tightness in his (heart? nah, his heart's just not squishy enough anymore) lungs to fucking ease up and he'll gnash canines down to the bone to get that respite if he has to]
[ (there's a smoke burning a hole in his pocket and it doesn't mean a goddamned thing) ]
Reply
Whatcha gonna hope for now?
[ Luke to come back? that a freezerpops douchebag will finally understand? the lost fuckin' cause Genkaku is? there's nothing left to buy and Badou wants to live stingy anyway. ]
[ the flesh of his hand only shivers, and he wonders if they'll scar as he watches saliva-slicked teeth gleam in the mire. ]
Reply
[his voice is hoarse, like he's been shouting instead of swallowing shards of words and cheap beer]
Nothing! Fucking nothing! I know, okay? I fucking know! Fuck you!
[his teeth bare in another wide, humourless grin before he manages to ram his knee into Genkaku's stomach (spacespacespaceIcan'tbreathehere) ]
Reply
[ to bring Badou closer to him, to bury him into himself as though he were the sliver, Genkaku will take his pain. ]
Only I can fit here.
[ in the unseeing, the only thing felt is a gasphuff of monk's heavy boiler breath on the other's chest, his body curled over where the knee had clipped him. his equally warm palm smears blood down fabric and plants a great, wet spot on over his heart that will be brown by the time they're finished here. ]
[ he murmurs en mantra; ]
It's mine. You're mine. This is mine.
[ ruined fingers find the parted, angry mouth and jam down past his tongue: a cog in the gears. ]
Reply
[mine, mine, mine - what's the point of carving a space in someone if they just fucking leave later? why should he trust Genkaku not to get swept away? there'd been a reason Heine was his partner, because it was so easy to let Heine wander in and out of his life]
[you'll leave, he wants to choke out, and he's glad for the violation then, so that it stays unsaid except in the too-wideness of his eye. what if you leave, what if you get taken away, what if you fucking die like all the rest, you don't have to be a wisebird to get lost]
[Badou's good at running, but he's never been able to escape those swallowed cries of unfair, just let them snip away all traces of carewantcamaraderie from his heart, draining them from every interaction]
[when he gags on the blood in his throat, he's just so fucking relieved]
Reply
[ his fingers twist and jam and jar, face-fucking digits deep into the mouth that wants to release and bite words and fears and questions. instead of answers, all he receives is a sweat-matted snake, slithering up the side of his neck and tasting as he went, blood and panic and adrenaline all on his tongue as it laps over angles of his jaw and the bumps black straps. ]
[ with the scar of his chest smashed onto the handprint he'd left behind and a guttural gutter growl into his ear, he's swearing off his own fears ("I'm confident you'll bail") to be caught up in that moment (now); ]
You're broken again. In real bad places.
[ don't speak don't breathe don't move don't think don't be ]
I'll fix 'em all.
Reply
[the saliva on his neck cools, the words chipping the back of his molars recede, and the blood from Genkaku's ripped fingers is swallowed]
[his own hand finally comes up, junkie twitching but not trembling, not fight-or-flight fear]
[and with that marionette hand he wrenches the fingers out of his jaws (not without scraping knuckles and cracking nails), turns his head to the side, and croaks hoarsely;]
Y...you got a smoke?
Reply
[ the embers of the cigarette trail back to the mattress between fingers, and the monk's jaw lowers on the undergrounder's, mouth parting mouth. the requested smoke is passed over with a rancid, seeking tongue; from one lung (life) to another. ]
Reply
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