Paid in Full - Part 4

[nicslash]

On the way to work Thursday morning Jensen notices that Jared obnoxious big black truck isn’t in the parking lot. It’s early in the morning and usually Jared leaves after Jensen so it’s a little weird, but Jensen doesn’t give it much thought. He’s so exhausted by the time he gets home that night, he doesn’t even notice that it’s still not there.

He does notice the truck is still missing the next morning and all the way to the office Jensen is trying to think of anything Jared might’ve said he was doing this weekend.  Maybe he was going out of town or had to get the truck fixed or something. Whatever it is, Jensen can’t for the life of him remember and gives up by the time he walks to the elevator of his building.

It’s Friday and Jensen can’t wait to get home.  Unfortunately his client won’t stop calling him every two seconds about more alimony. More child support. More money. More. More. More. Apparently three thousand dollars a month isn’t enough from her husband, but maybe if she gets his retirement plan she’ll settle.

By the time seven o’clock rolls around Jensen is just done with this day. With another fucked up week behind him, all he can think about is beer, steak, and his stupid neighbor who won’t return any of his texts.

Jensen’s so tired he ends up calling ahead at the diner by his place for two steaks and baked potatoes, runs across the street for a six pack and calls it a night.  He had forgotten though, that Jared might not be home and when he sees that the truck is still gone a sinking feeling replaces the tired and hungry he was just a few seconds ago.

He knocks on Jared’s door before going into his own place and dumping the food on the table. It’s a relief when he hears the screen door open and footsteps follow a few seconds later.

“Hey, man. Where you been?”

Jared sighs heavily and sinks into one of the kitchen chairs. “Around. Just thinking about shit.”

“Everything okay?”

Jensen notices the difference in Jared’s posture right away. The slouch of his shoulders, the tension in his neck, the stress making his veins more distinct in his arms. He let his beard grow out and his bangs are falling in his eyes. Jensen would call him a hairy beast, but now’s obviously not the time.

“Yeah, I guess.” Jared says and it’s a façade that Jensen can see right through. He’ll let it go for now because that’s what guys do. When the time is right, he knows Jared will tell him what’s going on.

“Got some dinner. You in?”

Jared brightens slightly at that. “You don’t mind?”

“Duh. Got some for both of us.” He begins to open containers and spreads the food out on the table. “Hey where’s your truck? It’s not in the lot.”

Jared stiffens and bows his head again. “Oh um. Nick had to borrow it. Had to move something big.”

It’s a lie and that’s not cool. That’s crossing the line. Jensen’s about to call him out on it when Jared’s cell phone rings. He rolls his eyes, which means it’s his mom.

“Hey ma.”

Jensen turns to give him the illusion of privacy and opens the fridge. Damn, he’s out of steak sauce. “You got some A1 at your place?” He whispers.

Jared covers the mouth piece and says, “Yeah, door’s open.” Then a scold must come from his mother. “Yeah, ma, I’m listening. It should be there in a few days, I sent it yesterday… Yes, mom. I called Uncle Frank for his birthday.”

The door to Jared’s place has a stick to it and Jensen always has to push on it hard. He stumbles in the darkness and knows right where the light switch is because it’s the same at his house. The sun is going down, setting off a soft glow in the kitchen and Jensen heads right for the fridge.

Jared absolutely has steak sauce. Of course he does. But that’s about all he has besides a jar of old pickles and an open can of tuna. Out of curiosity, Jensen opens the freezer door and doesn’t find the frozen fruit Jared uses to make smoothies in the morning. He doesn’t find the popsicles or ice cream or any meat that Jared usually keeps on hand. What he does find are a lot Healthy Choice frozen dinners.

Jensen opens the pantry too, because now he’s just confused to where all the food has gone. Surly, Jared is not on a diet. There’s not an ounce of fat on that body. There’s a box of crackers and some macaroni and that’s all he finds in the normally very packed pantry.

The A1 sauce is sitting on the counter and Jensen grabs it before leaving. He stops in his tracks when he notices the television and play station are gone, in its place loose wires and emptiness.

What the fuck is going on?

Jensen slams the door after he leaves and closes his mouth when he sees Jared’s still sitting at the table talking to his mom.

“Well maybe you should try that doctor that we heard about on the radio. You know Jeff and Megan will take you whenever you want. I know it’s expensive but…. Yeah, okay. Yes, I’m eating.”

At that, Jensen narrows his eyes at Jared and looks for signs that he actually has been feeding himself. He already has a thin waist, jeans practically hanging off his nonexistent hips. But his shoulders still look strong, fit and muscular.

He’s still studying Jared’s body when he hangs up the phone and gives Jensen a weird look. “We eating or what?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s up with you?”

“What’s up with me?” Oh no. Jensen can start to hear the frustration in his voice. “What the hell is up with you, my friend?”

“What’re you talking about?”

“Did your house get robbed or something? Because the TV and the play station are gone. Not to mention all the food. So either something’s going on with you or you got taken by a well fed thief who is now awesome at video games.”

Jared flinches but Jensen doesn’t stop at that, he's now in full on lawyer mode. “You’ve been pissy for a few weeks now, like you’re depressed and gonna off yourself any minute but I know you won’t because you’re not that stupid, am I right? Jay?” He doesn’t give him a chance to answer. “And I know you. Don’t forget that I know you now, better than you think I do and I can tell when you’re miserable.”

“I’m not miserable.” Jared manages in a small voice.

“Oh yeah? You don’t wanna do anything anymore.” Jensen’s almost shrieking now.

Jared lifts his eyes. “Not true.”

“Bullshit.” Jensen starts to count on his fingers to prove the point. “You don’t wanna go to the bar, you don’t wanna go eat anywhere, two weeks ago you didn’t even wanna see that freaky movie you’ve been waiting forever to come out, you don’t wanna go to the gym anymore. Hell, you don’t wanna even come over here and have dinner.  What the fuck, man? Did I do something to piss you off?”

“No. Jesus, no.” Jared says, now avoiding any eye contact. “That’s not it.”

“Will you just tell me then? Please? Let’s not be chicks about this.”

“Fine.” And finally Jensen can see what Jared’s been hiding because it’s written all over his face.

Embarrassment.

“You wanna know why I don’t want to go anywhere? Because I’m fucking broke, Jensen. I have like, a hundred dollars in my checking account right now. I can’t afford going out, I felt bad about you always paying for food, and I canceled my gym membership, I sold my TV, oh and I lied about the truck. Nick doesn’t have it. I sold it a yesterday to catch up on my rent. I’ll have to take the bus and ride my bike everywhere.  So there, you happy now?”

“God damn, Jay why didn’t you say something?”

“Because of that pity frown on your face right now. Didn’t want to see it.”

Jensen instantly makes his expression neutral. “That’s not good enough.”

“Can we just not talk about this?”

“Um. No.” Jensen doesn’t want to but the only thing he can think to do is lock his jaw and put his hands on his hips. “Why’re you so broke anyway? You have a good paying job. Wait, don’t tell me you got canned!”

“No, no. Nothing like that. Look, can we at least eat while I tell you? I haven’t had a decent meal in awhile. I’ve been living on frozen dinners because they were on sale.”

Jensen deflates at that. “Yeah, of course.” He grabs some forks and knives, sits down and waits. He lost his appetite right about the time Jared said he canceled his gym membership. Jared loves going to the gym.

“So remember when I told you that my mom is sick? It’s more serious than we thought and we all have to chip in on the medical bills. My brother and sister can’t afford it so we’ve all been helping and I’ve been sending a check every week.”

“Oh.” Jensen feels bad for yelling now.

“And it’s been almost a year since school ended so now I have to start paying my loans back.”

“Oh.”

“And well, I put some expenses on my credit card and that was getting outta control so I had to sell my truck and--”

“Stop eating?”

“It’s not like I’m starving or anything. I just had to cut back on a few things. Wow, this steak is really fucking good.”

Jensen takes a few bites of his meat, says he’s full and puts the rest on Jared’s plate.

He doesn’t really notice and keeps talking. “I used to be able to afford rent with my savings and loans and now that money’s not coming in. And I guess if I can’t figure out something soon I’ll have to move back to California and in with my mom or--”

“But you hate California and your mom drives you crazy.” Jensen says is a rush full of panic, his chest tightening with the thought of losing Jared.

Jared shrugs. “Or I could get a second job.”

“But you’re already exhausted when you get home and you’ll have no life if you do that.”

“Well, Jen.” It comes out a little exasperated. “I’m all ears for more suggestions.”

Jensen doesn’t hesitate at all. “I’ll loan you some money.”

Neither does Jared. “No. Nope. No way. Not a chance in hell.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Because… because…” Jared searches for words while Jensen watches with satisfied amusement.

“Well?”

“Because I don’t want you to.”

“Again.” Jensen’s tone is deep and stern. “Not good enough.”

“Look, that’ll just cause problems and I already have enough shit to worry about. I don’t want anything to come between…” Jared gestures between them. “Whatever. And then it’ll become awkward and we won’t hang out anymore and it would take me awhile to pay you back anyway and I just don’t see how that could make anything better.”

“Just to get you caught up.” Jensen says. “So you don’t have to move or get a second job.”

“Why do you even care?”

“How can you ask that, you dumbass? Because we’re friends. You know I can’t say that about anyone else. What’s money between friends, huh? Just money. It doesn’t have to be weird at all. Just take it.”

Jared scoffs. “I think you’re underestimating how much I would need.”

Jensen doesn’t take the bait. He looks at Jared dead in the eye as he makes his way to the desk and grabs his check book, writes out a check and hands it over. Just like that.

“I’m in a lot of debt, Jensen. And --” Jared stops when he takes the check and reads it. “This would… get me out of it.”

“So good.” Jensen grins. “Take it. Buy some food. Get a beat up car. Pay your credit card bills. Do whatever you need to do.”

“I doubt it would be that easy.” Jared gets up from the table and shakes his head, leaves the check near his cleaned plate. “Thanks for dinner. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

Jensen doesn’t move, doesn’t want to push Jared further away and tries to hide the desperation in his voice. “Just think about it. Jared, please just sleep on it. Please. It’s not that big a deal.”

He can’t really tell but Jensen is only a little certain that he saw Jared nod as he leaves.

The check stays on the kitchen table and later that night, after Jensen gets into bed, he waits for the knock to come on his bedroom wall. It never does.



The chime of his cell phone wakes Jensen up the next morning, startling him good enough to sit up straight in his bed with arms failing a bit.

A text from Jared that reads I have an idea at nine in the morning on a Saturday is never good.

Jensen moans into his pillow before he hears the front door open and Jared’s rather large body practically fly up the staircase.

“Seriously?” Jensen’s grumpy in the mornings and it doesn’t matter that his friend is a little delicate right now. “This is what our friendship has come to?”

“What’s the problem?” Jared asks, sincerely confused. He sits cross legged on the bed like it’s the most natural thing in the world. His beard is almost full blown now, the thinner parts becoming thicker with hair. He’s wearing a thin undershirt that has to be about a century old and pajama pants with ducks on them.

“Uh, I could be naked under here.” Jensen pulls at the sheets to cover his bare chest. He always wears boxer briefs to bed and last night was no exception, but still.

Jared raises his eyebrows with a smile, still not understanding. “Well are you?”

“No.  But I could be.”

“Are you done having a girl moment so I can tell you my idea now?”

“Fine.” Jensen gets up, modesty forgotten, goes to wash his face and brush his teeth while Jared starts to talk, then crawls right back into bed and closes his eyes.

“So I was thinking about taking the money you offered last night…”

“Good. Perfect. I would’ve made you anyway.”

Jared takes a deep breath, he’s nervous, and Jensen can’t see him but he’s sure there’s twisting of fingers going on. “And I was thinking maybe I could give you something in return.”

Jensen’s so comfortable right now, pillow in that perfect spot right under his cheek. He can’t even be bothered to look up. “That’s great but you don’t have anything that I want. No offense, but the cheese crumbs under your couch aren’t exactly bargaining material, am I right?” He laughs at his own joke and settles more into the bed.

“Well that’s not exactly true, is it Jensen?”

And that voice. Jensen’s never heard that voice from Jared before. It’s a low and teasing and kinda… flirty. Whatever it is, it makes Jensen finally turn over and now his eyebrows are raised. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I’ll take the money if you let me be… your faux boyfriend.” The last part comes out really fast in a mumble.

“Huh?” Jensen is also not very elegant in the mornings.

“You said yourself that you miss having a boyfriend--”

“I never said that.”

Jared tilts his head and smiles. “Remember that night of the game when you got drunk and--”

“Okay, okay, okay. Stop.” Goddammit, Jensen’s never drinking again. “I might’ve said something like that but I’m too busy to get into a relationship right now.”

“Exactly!” Jared scoots closer and his movements are eager, excited in a way that Jensen hasn’t seen for a few months, the stress of having less and less money going on longer than Jensen had thought. “That’s why this will be perfect! I can fill the boyfriend void you have, and not all of it because that would be kinda weird, but some of the stuff you mentioned like, I don’t know, holding hands n’cuddling n’shit like that. I could do that stuff and you wouldn’t be tied into something you don’t have time for, ya know?”

It’s so ridiculous. It’s so fucking stupid. It’s so absurd that all Jensen can think to say is, “Jared, you’re not gay.”

“It doesn’t matter, does it? You don’t want a relationship right now and it wouldn’t be a real one anyway. So who cares as long as it feels good.”

There’s nothing Jensen can do except to stare and let his mouth hang open.

“I was up all night thinking about it. I wouldn’t feel too bad about taking your money when I can be paying you back like this for now. And we get along great so it’s not like it’s a hardship being in my company or anything. It’ll just be like we’re hanging out like usual, except there will be more touching. And you always try to cop a feel during basketball games anyway and it doesn’t gross me out or anything.”

Jensen tries to protest at that but gets cut off.

“Don’t lie, Jen. You totally grope me when you can. You know I don’t gross you out either, obviously, especially since you tried to feel me up when you were drunk. And maybe I can spend the night sometimes… remember when I did that one time when the alarm was going off next door? It wasn’t weird at all. And we already have dinner together practically every night so that wouldn’t be anything new. So… what’d ya say? Jen?”

Jensen has a few options he quickly runs through in his mind. First, he’s very tempted to laugh. Extremely long and loud. Because this shit? Is the funniest shit he’s heard all year. Second he could be really offended. Is he so pathetic that he has to pay someone to proposition him? That’s sad and depressing on so many levels. Third choice. Jensen could just go with it. Tell Jared that yes, he’ll do whatever he wants for him to take the damn money and be done with it. This whole charade of Jared’s will eventually fade out and be forgotten. But in the mean time, he’ll at least have some money to get out of debt.

Jensen’s still debating in his head, trying to think of the best way to let Jared down easy and let him know he doesn’t have to go through all this to take the check. Jared’s face is so hopeful and anxious though, it’s not going to be simple.

“Okay, let’s just try it.” Jared holds his hands out like Jensen’s a wild animal about to be spooked. “Lemme just…” he gets under the covers and stretches out, positioning himself right in the middle of the bed.

Jensen keeps on staring, wide eyed and in awe.

He gently pulls Jensen on top of his chest and wraps his arms around Jensen’s back, squeezing a little and then relaxing his large hands. “See? This isn’t bad at all, right? It’s kinda nice.”

“Um.” Jensen’s still in shock, not able at all to hide his surprise and finally just slumps down on Jared’s chest instead of holding himself away. It’s strange and awkward, but he doesn’t say anything.

“There we go. Knew it wouldn’t take much persuasion, you shy little lamb.”

Jensen hasn’t said anything this whole time and tries to find his voice. “Uh. Jay?”

“Shhhh. We’ll sleep now. Then we can talk later.” And then Jared pulls Jensen even closer, arms hugging tighter and when his hands starts to slid up into Jensen’s hair, kneading softly with those long fingers…

Well, maybe this isn’t such a bad idea after all.



After two hours of the most peaceful sleep ever, it all still doesn’t seem that bad an idea.

Except…

“Did you call me a shy little lamb?”

Jared wakes with a start and looks utterly confused as to where exactly he is and who is lying in his arms. The odd thing is, once he figures it out he doesn’t seem to mind at all.

“Mmm? Oh yeah, I think that I did.”

“Well that’s just rude.” Jensen gives a good slap to Jared’s stomach and lifts himself up.

Jared gives a disgruntled whimper and pulls him back down. “Where you goin’? Stay awhile, darlin’.”

Jensen shakes his head, completely amused, and throws the blankets off. It’s incredibly hot and Jared’s body takes up most of his bed with his long legs. “Little lamb… darlin’? Have you gone crazy?”

“Just crazy for you, babe.”

“Oh god. I’m getting up now before I die of humiliation. Who let you in my bed?” Jensen really does get up this time, kneeing Jared in the junk when he doesn’t let go.

“Aw, baby. Don’t be like that.” Jared smiles and puts his arms behind his head, looking rather comfortable and pleased with himself.

Jensen rolls his eyes on the way to the bathroom. He’ll let Jared have his fun for a few days and then this whole thing will blow over. “Seriously, Jay. I have shit to do today.”

“I know, I know.” He says, not moving to get up at all. “You and your stupid Saturday routine.”

“It’s not stupid.” Jensen stops to grab clean clothes from his closet. “I get shit done on Saturdays so I can have--”

“Sunday to relax, I know.”  Jared finally heaves his body out of bed and scratches at his beard. “So. What’re we doin’ today?”

“You gonna hang out?”

“I have no money and nothing to do. Yes, we’re hanging out.”

“Well first we can go to the bank and deposit your check.” Jensen says easily. “Then grocery store, dry cleaning, and then I have to build the bookshelf I bought.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Jared walks across the room and leans in close, invades Jensen’s personal space and purses his lips like he’s going to…

“Woah. What the fuck?”

“Too far?”

“Way. Very seriously, over the top, way too far.”

Jared grins all sly and slow, his eyes drop to Jensen’s mouth. “But I’m a real good kisser, Jen. Real good.”

“Just go home and shower. I don’t know if I can take this all day. Jesus.”

Laughing, Jared goes on his way and leaves Jensen a little stiff in his briefs.

It’s gonna be a damn long day.



It turns out to be a really fun day. Doing boring errands with someone like Jared makes chores a little better. He talks the entire time Jensen drives around town, points out everything he likes at the grocery store and actually comes up with good ideas for dinner and lunches. Jensen was getting tired of his ham and cheese sandwich every day. He’s a good sport about waiting when Jensen’s suits weren’t quite ready to be picked up yet at the cleaner’s and helped put everything away when they got back home.

“Jared… you know you don’t have to do all this, right?” Jensen says, hoping it doesn’t come out wrong. He’s actually afraid of hurting Jared’s feelings for some reason.

“Yeah, I know. I had fun though. Wasn’t worrying all day about money problems, it was nice. And besides, it’s not like I haven’t hung with you on a Saturday before. I know what I’m in for.”

It’s really warm in the kitchen, even after Jensen opens the back door and lets fresh air in. The days are getting longer, the sun staying high in the sky and going down slowly behind the rolling hills in the distance. It means summer is near and the heat feels good, yellow rays warming the tile on the floor. Jensen can’t wait for the days when he can sit outside till its dark and not need a jacket.

“So can we take a nap or is it bookcase time?” Jared claps his hands together and the noise is sharp, cutting through the silence.

Jensen opens the closet where he keeps all of his tools. “If we take a nap now we’ll never be able to sleep tonight. And last time that happened we stayed up all night watching crappy eighty movies. Lemme get the tool box.”

“A nap would be so good right now.” Jared says through a yawn. “But you’re right, let me at this beast.”

“Upstairs, c’mon.”

The second bedroom is small and also serves as Jensen’s office when he has to work on a case. There are books stacked in a tall pile in the corner of the room, hence the reason for the huge box in the middle of the floor.

“Hey, why didn’t you get the big one?” Jared jokes, dropping to his knees and getting to work on cutting open the cardboard.

And that little fucker. He strips off his shirt and throws it to the corner, tosses his hair back and slips on the tool belt Jensen had brought up with him.

It looks like the scene from a really bad, yet really hot porno movie.

“Is there a reason you’re half naked right now?”

“Nah, not really. Other than the fact that I know you’re appreciating the view right now.” Jared deliberately stops to flex his arms. “And it’s hotter than hell up here.”

That’s true. The heat does rise in these townhomes and Jensen doesn’t have room to argue, not even against the impressive span of pure solid muscle across Jared’s back, his chest hard and defined, perky nipples and washboard abs.

Jensen pretends to read the instructions while he really checks out his hot neighbor. Adorable, is really the word that comes to mind, along with sexy and totally distracting.

“Jen? You gonna help or just watch the show?” And Jared knows exactly how distracting he is.

“Hey,” Jensen grabs a screwdriver and points it at Jared. “You turning into a male stripper wasn’t my idea in the first place.”

Jared glances up and smirks. “You don’t seem to be complaining.” He pulls all the parts from the box one by one and makes a neat stack. “And you’re still staring.”

“And you’re still a dork.” It’s the best line he can think of while Jared bends over, flashing his tight little ass in those even tighter jeans.

By the time they’re done building the bookshelf, which takes an hour longer because they put in half the shelves backwards, Jared is dripping with sweat. He’s practically glistening all over, the drops building in the middle of his collarbone and sliding ever so slowly down the length of his stomach, along the trenches of muscle and ending at the brown leather belt holding his pants up.

It’s a sinful scene but Jensen can’t look away.

Jared stands straight and tall after he puts the last book on the shelf. “So is that a hammer in your pants or are you just happy to see me?”

“Oh shut up.” They break out laughing and Jensen flips out his phone to order in dinner. “Pizza sound good?”

“Yeah. I’m gonna go jump in the shower. I stink so bad right now.”

“’Kay, it’ll be here in twenty anyway.” Jensen doesn’t comment on the musky smell Jared’s body is producing because it isn’t that bad at all. In fact, his deodorant or aftershave or whatever Jared uses is spicy and masculine, the scent spiked by his heat.

It takes Jared about ten minutes in the shower and he comes back over with fresh clothes on, soft and worn thin to sleep in. The pizza arrives shortly, there’s ice cold beer, and a zombie movie on. Overall, it’s a perfect ending to a great day.

“This movie’s pretty scary.” Jared says around a mouthful of food and winks. “I might have to sleep over.”

Jensen bets himself five dollars that Jared will end up falling asleep on the couch, so he doesn’t even bother to respond.

He’s right. Jared does fall asleep, not even half way through the movie. Jensen tosses a blanket over him, turns off all the lights and heads upstairs. It doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep too, it’s been a full day and he’s tired. He figures Jared will wake up in a few hours and go home.

He’s wrong. Jared does wake up and around midnight Jensen feels him slide into bed.

“Jay? What’s up?”

“Cuddle time!”

“Oh Jesus, seriously… this is weird.” Jensen admits. ”I feel like I’m paying for sex or something.”

“No sex. Just cuddling. Relax.” Jared wraps his arm around Jensen’s torso and pulls him in, tucking Jensen into the nook of his armpit. He nuzzles Jensen’s temple and takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

A few seconds of silence pass and Jensen just can’t do it. “I can’t relax, Jared. This is really weird.”

“It’s only weird if you let it be. I don’t feel weird at all.”

“That’s because you are weird.”

“Nah. Shhh. Sleep time, my shy little lamb.”

“Oh my god.” That stupid nickname has to go. Jensen throws out a punch and it hits Jared hard in the gut.

He uses it to his advantage and tugs on Jensen’s arm so he falls onto his chest. “There, there, little lamb, don’t try to fight me.”

“I’m gonna kill you.”

“And I’m the big bad wolf.” Jared laughs and rubs his hairy cheek to Jensen’s. “Don’t front like you haven’t been wanting to make fun of my beard all day.”

“Git off me.” Jensen mumbles, trying to push Jared away but he’s too damn strong and they’re both tired. He breaks out into hysterical manly giggles as Jared starts to howl like a wolf and it’s too damn late to do anything other than collapse into the warm body beside him, still laughing and sated, sleepy and pretty content with this whole arrangement.

Part 5