Journeys (5b/5)
Title: Journeys (Table of Contents)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Nothing you recognize is mine. I gain nothing of material value from this.
Part I a b Part II a b c d Part III a b c d e Part IV a b c d Part V a
23 June 2003; Kalima, Abydos; 0830 hrs
"The others did not escape?" Sha'uri said.
Jack shook his head. "I'm sorry. There's just no way anyone survived that blast except through the Stargate, and only Skaara made it through that way."
"But they turned into light," Skaara said, turning to Jack as if for proof. "Like Dan'yel did. All of us saw."
"We think most of the men who fell defending Abydos Ascended," Jack confirmed.
Daniel suddenly looked over his shoulder, then turned back, frowning. The others didn't seem to notice, though, because Kasuf had come over to touch him lightly on the shoulder. "Hello?" Daniel said, sounding slightly unnerved.
"Dan'yel," Kasuf said, spreading his arms.
When Daniel didn't move--he must not have remembered that the correct response was a hug and might not remember Kasuf at all--Jack stepped in to say, "Ah...yes. That's the other thing. Daniel's back"--he raised his voice to be heard over a sudden outbreak of whispers--"but he doesn't remember very much."
"You are back," Sha'uri said, sounding stunned.
"Uh," Daniel said.
"Sho'ni!" someone said suddenly, and pointed in the direction where the Stargate had once been and where their village had been destroyed. "Irif Dan'yel pen."
"Na nay," Daniel answered, holding up his hands and stepping back. "Ne sakhiu!"
"He really doesn't remember!" Jack said over the noise. "All right? We don't know what happened back there."
"But why did you come back to our world?" Kasuf asked Daniel.
"I...I don't know," Daniel said.
"Look, can we have some space?" Jack called. "Skaara's back..." A glance over showed Skaara, looking very tired but exhilarated, clutching a girl to himself. "There, you see? They've got the right idea. Go and catch up. Plan a wedding. We need to talk to Kasuf."
To his surprise, Sha'uri pulled away and said, "Please, come with me, Colonel. Father..." She stood on her toes to speak quietly into his ear. Kasuf nodded and raised his voice to call some sort of order while Sha'uri beckoned Jack and Daniel back into the ramshackle camp their village had set up.
...x...
"My father still commands much respect among the people," Sha'uri told them once they were in her makeshift tent, "but he is growing old. He has been badly ill twice in the last year."
"Ah," Jack said. "I'm sorry to hear that."
"Yes," she agreed calmly, smiling quickly at him. Daniel was staring at her as she sat down, and Jack realized that he had no idea where she stood on the spectrum between remembrance and total amnesia, except that he'd dreamed up her name on his own. "Dan'yel?" she said, reaching out to touch his knee.
"I remember you," Daniel said. "And Skaara has told me a lot about you."
"But you do not remember my father? Kasuf? " she asked. Daniel didn't answer, looking embarrassed. "Perhaps there are...things at the SGC that reminded you of my brother and of me."
"Amaunet," Daniel said.
Taken aback, Sha'uri paused and glanced at Jack before nodding. "Yes. You remember--?"
"Shifu," he blurted suddenly. "You were at the SGC with Shifu. We dreamed together, and I never wrote down what we dreamed, but I remember it. And Cimmeria--"
"Yes." Sha'uri squeezed his knee and let go, smiling warmly but keeping a careful distance when it was clear Daniel was still uncomfortable. There was another short hesitation, and then, "You spoke to me of Shifu." She pointed upward. "While you were Ascended. Do you remember?"
"No," Daniel said. "I don't."
Seemingly still stuck on the fact that he'd been there at all and had then come back, she said, "You were so powerful. Why would you wish to give that away?"
"I don't know," Daniel repeated. "Maybe I didn't. We...we think it was my punishment."
"For what?" she said, bewildered.
"Actually," Jack said, "I'm not so sure it was a punishment. I think you Descended all on your own because you got sick of the Others' being so stuck up."
"In any case," Daniel said, shooting him a glance, "there are more important things to talk about now. Like what we're going to do now that we don't have a Stargate on this planet."
Sha'uri nodded. "We will survive, as we always do. Nagada has been our home for thousands of years, but there is enough space in the mountains for Kalima and us both. And if there is no Stargate, then no Goa'uld can use it to find us."
"Anubis didn't need a Stargate," Jack pointed out, but he'd been thinking and had just about come to the same conclusion that she had.
"We can never avoid all danger," Sha'uri said. "The Goa'uld have no reason to return here now that the Eye of Ra is gone, and perhaps they will believe that Anubis destroyed this planet."
Jack nodded slowly. "We can try to leak that rumor," he said. "Let it get out that the Abydonian people died in Anubis's attack. We can even arrange it so that, as far as most of Earth is concerned, there's nothing left here. Not even a rogue division of our government would have any reason to be interested."
"Wh...but...you think we should cut off ties?" Daniel said. "What about...there's still naquadah here. There's...there's..."
...not a lot that Earth's governments care about, Jack thought. "I'm not saying I want to cut off ties," he said carefully. "Unless it turns out to be the best option--the safest option."
Daniel stared at him, then Sha'uri, and then back. "We can get a new Stargate," he said.
"You can't just pick one up at the Home Depot," Jack pointed out.
"There are abandoned planets," Daniel said. "Jack, we could...haul a 'gate over here, like we were going to do for the Tok'ra, and--"
"And we don't have a mothership," Jack said. "A Stargate's not going to fit inside a teltak."
"What about the Prometheus?" he said more insistently. "Wasn't that supposed to be repaired in...in a few months? Even an al'kesh might be big enough, if we ever salvage one. All we'd need to do is find some abandoned planet and bring its 'gate to Abydos. It's not even that far. We'd only need...a week, maybe, to move it and then set it up and go home."
"That area where it used to be is uninhabitable."
"It doesn't matter where we put it," Daniel said emphatically.
"Perhaps it is safer like this," Sha'uri said.
Daniel looked like he'd been punched in the gut. "It's not a long trip," Jack said. "It's the closest planet to us in the Stargate network, Daniel. All you need is a ship with a hyperdrive and a day or so of free time to get there and back."
"We don't have a ship with a hyperdrive," Daniel answered tensely. "Even when the Prometheus is repaired, we're going to need it to protect Earth. Trips to another planet wouldn't be authorized without a good reason, not when it takes a ship out of communications range for days at a time when we need every scrap of defense we can get."
Jack looked at Sha'uri, who seemed genuinely regretful when she said, "I would be greatly saddened to lose the friendship of the Tau'ri. You have done much for me and for my people. But Abydos has survived without Earth, and we will again. Kalima has been kind to the inhabitants of Nagada, and we have begun to rebuild here. I am sure Colonel O'Neill will agree that Earth also does not need Abydos."
"That's not true," Daniel said, though even he didn't sound very convinced.
"It is, my brother," Sha'uri said. "Are there not planets where the SGC can find naquadah? We have little to offer the SGC."
"For the record," Jack said, "the SGC is also very glad to have friends here. If it's all right with you, we'd like to send a few people to help you get started here in the mountains. And there's no reason we can't send a ship once in a while to check. Not often, and probably not anytime soon, since this is the only working ship we've got, but we could eventually find a way."
"And our naquadah?" Sha'uri said. "Your teams have mined carefully to avoid disturbing us, but if we will no longer have the Stargate, we would allow you to take all you need when you go."
"Sure," Jack said. "Now, all of this still has to be approved, but I'm pretty sure it will be."
Sha'uri nodded. "Agreed, with our thanks for all you have done for us."
It was a long moment before Jack realized no one was speaking because they were both waiting for Daniel to protest again. Instead, Daniel said, looking at his feet, "It'll take some time. Right? To...to mine and all."
"Yeah," Jack said. "I don't know if SG-1 can stay the whole time, depending on how much we're going to try to do, but we'll be here if possible."
Daniel nodded. "How long do I have?" he asked, his voice quiet, though he still looked unusually on edge. Sha'uri looked like she wanted to reach for him again but pulled her hand back.
Jack didn't have to ask what he was talking about. "I'd say...couple of weeks, with another check-in after that--maybe once the Prometheus is available again--to make sure things are going well and to tie up last loose ends."
"Right," Daniel said. He nodded again, then stood and left without a word.
Jack debated going after him, but logically, he wasn't going anywhere far from his people, and Jack had a few things left to finish up here. "I'm going back to the SGC soon," he told Sha'uri instead. "I'll take Jonas with me, and hopefully, we'll be back with more personnel and equipment, as well as instructions on how to handle this situation."
Sha'uri nodded. "Your people are welcome here, Colonel, for as long as you can stay. I do not wish to sound ungrateful to your people, but--"
"We've brought enough trouble down on you folks," Jack said, shaking his head. "Our only concern is doing whatever's best for your safety. If that means leaving you out of our reach, then we wish you the best."
"I saw the ruins of Nagada," she said. "It is strange--I mourned the destruction of our burial grounds nearly as much as I do the loss of our home."
"Yeah, uh, it's...a lot of take in," Jack said awkwardly, not really sure how to answer that. He was pretty sure any one of his teammates was better than he at talking to friendly allies.
But she only nodded. "We will remember all that we lost and gained, but our past held many lies and much suffering. Perhaps this is how we can begin again, finally. Nagada was chosen for its mineral; our ancestors lived there as slaves. We can begin here as free people in Kalima. Nagada was our past; Kalima can be our future."
"Well, I'm sure you'll do fine," Jack said.
Sha'uri stood, wrapping her robe more tightly around herself. "Take care of Dan'yel for us, Colonel," she said.
"I'm not sure he'll be coming with us when we go," he confided, standing up with her.
With a small smile, she said, "You have now known him nearly as long as I. How could he ever be at peace here, knowing what the SGC is?" Jack nodded but didn't answer. "Please, come, Colonel--the people are eager to speak to you."
XXXXX
23 June 2003; Kalima, Abydos; 1900 hrs
When darkness fell, Teal'c found Daniel Jackson sitting against the side of the cave where they were staying for the night. A glance inside showed that Major Carter was preparing to sleep--she had spent the day examining the local water sources and planning ways to improve its use--so he returned to the outside and sat down in front of Daniel Jackson.
"Are you all right?" Teal'c said.
Daniel Jackson jumped, as if surprised to see him there. "Teal'c! What?"
"Of what are you thinking?" Teal'c asked.
"Um...well, you know," Daniel Jackson said, hunching his shoulders uncomfortably. "Things."
"Do you not wish to spend time with your people?" Teal'c asked.
"I spent all day walking around and meeting people, but I don't know what to say to them," he said. "They all know me and expect me to know them. And apparently I used to be...a little disobedient and sometimes ran off on my own to go exploring--what are you laughing at?"
Teal'c did not bother to stop smiling. "I am not laughing."
Looking exasperated, Daniel Jackson said, "Well, no one's sure whether or not I should recognize Kalima at all, especially with the new settlement here in the mountains."
"Did you recognize Nagada after spending some time there?" Teal'c asked.
He shrugged. "No, not really. And now this..."
The first time Teal'c had returned to Chulak to find that the towns had been reorganized, his old home abandoned, his wife's home also abandoned... "It no longer feels like your home," Teal'c guessed.
"According to what I'm told, it hasn't been my home for a while," he said, quietly. "And I think people here expect me to...to make it rain on their crops or something." Teal'c raised an eyebrow. "Someone asked me to do that while I was helping with reconstruction," Daniel Jackson admitted. "They're starting their farms from scratch and could use some help from the heavens."
"I see," Teal'c said.
"At least at the SGC, inexplicable things are expected to happen," he said. "At least people there knew who I am now, not someone--or something--I used to be."
That was not completely true--many even now looked at him and half-expected him to Ascend--but it was true for SG-1, at least. "What of Skaara?" Teal'c asked.
"Well, Skaara's different," Daniel said. "He and Sha'uri have probably seen things even we would find hard to imagine. They understand better."
Teal'c nodded. "Where is he now?"
"With Seinah," he said. His face took on an expression that was both dismayed and mischievous. "She's very excited that he's alive, and they're going to marry as soon as Skaara's had a chance to set up a home with her, so...I really don't want to see what they're doing right now."
Teal'c suppressed a smile. "You will understand one day," he said.
Daniel Jackson rolled his eyes. "I understand; I just don't need to think about it. Anyway, that was my day. How was yours?"
"Productive," Teal'c said. "The rebuilding has been going well." He attempted to discover what it was that continued to bother Daniel Jackson. "Is something else the matter?"
"No," Daniel Jackson said, and then, "Maybe. I think I'm remembering a few things from when I was Ascended."
"What things?" Teal'c asked.
He shook his head, looking bewildered. "It doesn't all make sense. Most of it's just feelings of...something. Images. Everything I think I remember is something I could have just imagined or dreamed, not anything particularly otherworldly. And..." He looked around, perhaps to ascertain that there were no people nearby, then lowered his voice. "Did Jack ever tell you exactly what Ba'al did to him? There's a note in the report about using the sarcophagus, but did he ever mention anything...well, specific?"
Taken aback, Teal'c could only shake his head. "Indeed he did not. To my knowledge, no one at the SGC knows the details of what he suffered."
"So there's no way I would've heard the details somewhere."
Teal'c set his hands on the ground and leaned his weight onto them. "You believe that you were present during his time in Ba'al's outpost."
Daniel Jackson clenched his hands into fists and knocked one of them agitatedly against his thigh. "If so, one would think I'd have done something more than watch, yes?"
"Perhaps you were unable to act," Teal'c said. "O'Neill himself may be able to shed more light upon this."
Uneasily, Daniel Jackson said, "I don't think he really needs to be reminded of that. Teal'c, don't, uh...don't tell him I said--"
"I will not," Teal'c assured him. He had imagined O'Neill's torture in Ba'al's prison too many times already.
"So. Does Ba'al...huh."
"Are there other instances that you remember?" Teal'c asked. Daniel Jackson blinked thoughtfully at the ground and did not answer. Teal'c peered through the dim lamplight at his friend's eyes and found them unfocused. "Daniel Jackson?"
"What?" he said, startled into looking back up.
This was not the first time such a thing had happened in the past days. "Have you been unwell?" Teal'c asked.
Daniel Jackson shook his head. "I keep...I can't quite..." He sighed again. "There's something I need to remember and I can't. Something really important."
"It will return to you," Teal'c assured him, though he was confident of no such thing.
"Did you know Jack thinks I Descended on purpose? Sha'uri thinks I wouldn't have given it up. I want to agree with her, but what good did I do while Ascended? I don't know what to think."
"Nor do I," Teal'c admitted. "Ascension is a state that some Jaffa strive for their whole lives to achieve. However...you did appear dissatisfied with the limits imposed upon you. That was what O'Neill believed, and indeed, your actions with regard to Martouf and the Eye of Ra suggested the same."
"Wait," Daniel Jackson said, frowning at him in the dark. "Did you say I appeared dissatisfied to you? Sometime other than the thing with the Eye of Ra?"
A part of Teal'c wished that Daniel Jackson had remembered that dream on his own, partly because it would confirm that it had been more than a dream and partly because it would mean that it had been as important to his friend as it had been to himself. He knew this was unreasonable, though--Daniel Jackson was unable to remember many things, including much of his childhood, which Teal'c suspected were the happiest memories he had. No one understood what Oma Desala or the Others had done to him.
"Are you familiar with the ambush of Kresh'tar?" Teal'c said.
"Um...yes, I read that one," Daniel Jackson said. "You met with other rebel leaders. They were killed, but you passed your symbiote to Bra'tac enough to keep him and yourself alive until SG-1 found you."
"There is something that is not in the report," Teal'c said. "As I lay near death, I began to dream. You used your abilities to appear to me in that dream."
Daniel Jackson straightened and stared at Teal'c. "I did?"
"Indeed," Teal'c said. "When I had sufficiently recovered, you appeared to me again, and that is when I knew: you had stayed with me and watched over me for three days. And that is the reason for which I am eternally grateful to you, Daniel Jackson."
"Wow," Daniel Jackson said. "So you think these things I remember...even though they're hard to believe or imagine..."
"They may be true," Teal'c said. "You were constrained by many limitations while Ascended, but I believe that you did what you could." Daniel Jackson snorted, dissatisfied. "Perhaps you stayed with O'Neill to offer comfort, as you did for me. I am certain you never betrayed who you are."
"It's just... Do you ever wonder if...if you're in the right place? If you're really what people think of you?" He stopped, shaking his head. "Never mind. You're probably not the right person to ask. They just keep talking about things they expect that I can do or what I was, but if I can't... I don't even know what I'm doing anymore."
Teal'c felt his hand try to move toward his symbiote pouch that was no longer a pouch but stopped himself with an effort.
Only months ago, he would not have had to carry medicine like a weakened old man. His symbiote had been his weakness, but it had also given him strength, a mark of who he was. The tretonin had only taken strength from him. The Tau'ri had not yet noticed that he could not lift as much weight as before, or that he tired more easily and wasted more time each day in rest. But one day they would, and if it happened in battle, his weakness would become his team's burden to bear.
"I am beginning to understand what you feel," he said quietly.
"You?" Daniel Jackson said.
"I have become more dependent on tretonin than I ever was on my symbiote," Teal'c said. "The symbiote at least depended on me as well."
"What, so because tretonin is a one-way street, it's worse?" Daniel Jackson asked. His brow furrowed, and he laughed uncertainly. "Teal'c, you're still the best warrior the SGC has ever seen, not to mention one of the most knowledgeable and resourceful--"
"Do not," Teal'c said sharply.
Daniel Jackson stopped. "Teal'c?"
Teal'c stood. He did not wish to trouble his friend with his own doubts. "It is late, Daniel Jackson," he said stiffly.
"Whoa--wait," Daniel Jackson said, standing as well, frowning. "What was that? What are you talking about?"
Forcing himself to remain calm--anything else would be only weakness as well--Teal'c said, "It is nothing. We should rest. O'Neill will return with the teltak before sunrise."
"Are you going to kelno'reem inside?" Daniel Jackson said. "Sam and I are staying this way."
"I no longer perform kelno'reem," Teal'c said. As much as he had hated his symbiote, he had always been able to take comfort in the peace of kelno'reem.
"What--oh," Daniel Jackson said. A look of realization passed over his face, and Teal'c walked past him before he had to answer for it. "Oh. Teal'c, hold on. Are you--"
"Major Carter is asleep," Teal'c interrupted before he pulled aside the curtain to their shelter. "You should be as well."
...x...
27 June 2003; Nagada Ruins, Abydos; 0300 hrs
SG-1 stayed on Abydos with a team of engineers, who worked to devise a more efficient irrigation system while SG-1 and Abydonian volunteers sifted through the ruins of the village. Teal'c assisted as much as he could in packing and loading the hastily collected naquadah and did not react when one of the items O'Neill and Jonas Quinn had brought back from Earth was several more doses of tretonin.
"Just in case," Jonas Quinn said, giving him a tentative smile. "Not that you need it. I mean, you do, obviously, physically, but--"
"Thank you," Teal'c interrupted. He took the drug and returned to work.
Teal'c had expected Daniel Jackson to spend these next days with the people he had known as a child, trying to regain memories or asking what he had missed in the last year. That he was not doing so as much as expected, however, was concerning.
"You think he's been sticking with us now because he's planning to stay here?" Major Carter said worriedly while they worked together, stacking crates of unrefined naquadah and securing them in the cargo hold. "Like he's trying to spend as much time with us as he can before...?" She raised her eyebrows.
But neither was that correct. Daniel Jackson was supposed to have been helping several meters away with Jonas Quinn, but Teal'c could see that he was not paying attention. It took a gentle nudge from Jonas Quinn to startle him back to focus.
"I do not believe that is the case," Teal'c said.
As he began to step out of the cargo bay, however, Major Carter called, "Teal'c, look out!"
Too late, the sound of shifting caught his attention, and he turned to see a large crate sliding from its place on the teltak. He reached automatically to catch it, even as Major Carter said, "Don't, what are you--"
He caught the crate easily, but he had not been paying attention and had not seen how heavy it was. It continued falling despite his efforts, and he stumbled to the floor beneath its weight--
Several hands grabbed the edges of the crate, and before long, the weight disappeared. "Teal'c!" O'Neill's voice said as the container rolled onto its side. "You okay, buddy?"
Teal'c sat up and found that he needed a moment to pull breath into his lungs when he had not noticed before that he had lost his breath. "I am fine," he said. O'Neill was there, but so were Jonas Quinn and Daniel Jackson and half of the Abydons who had come to help.
"Yeah, sure," O'Neill said, his tone now angry. "What the hell were you doing? That's solid naquadah in there. It took you and two other men to lift it in the first place!"
"Jack," Daniel Jackson started, "he was just reacting to--"
"He was just going to get himself flattened," O'Neill snapped back. "And why the hell wasn't that strapped down?"
Teal'c pushed himself angrily to his feet, surprised when the floor tilted beneath him. "Careful," Daniel Jackson's voice said as a hand reached for him.
Steadying himself, Teal'c grabbed Daniel Jackson's arm before it could reach him. "Leave me be," he growled.
Two surprised eyes blinked at him. Before anyone could speak further, he pulled roughly away from Daniel Jackson's hand.
"Teal'c, whoa," Major Carter said. "Take it easy."
"Uh...Daniel?" Jonas said. "Hello?"
Ignoring them all, Teal'c turned and strode back outside.
Another hand stopped him before he could return to his work. Teal'c attempted to throw it off again, but O'Neill was more persistent.
"All right," O'Neill said, standing squarely in his way. "Talk."
"There is nothing to say," Teal'c said.
"Don't give me that," O'Neill said.
Even now, Teal'c knew he could hurt any of his human friends if he so wished. He pulled his arm away from O'Neill, but it was quickly grabbed again.
"What's wrong with your arm?" O'Neill said.
Only then did Teal'c realize that there was an ache in his shoulder. "I am fine," he repeated.
"You know how this works," O'Neill said. "If there's something wrong with you, I need to know."
"I am--"
"Fine, yeah, I know," O'Neill finished, the words clipped. He looked over Teal'c once more, then said, "Have one of the medics on SG-8 check you out. Don't--don't give me that eyebrow! I don't need you ripping your arms out while we're here. Don't do any more heavy lifting until you're cleared."
"O'Neill--" Teal'c said before he could go.
"Yeah?"
Teal'c looked past him at SG-1 and several Abydons, all of them working hard, all of them humans and some barely half his weight.
"Teal'c," O'Neill said more quietly, "what's going on with you lately?"
"I have been dishonest with you," Teal'c said. "We are not in battle this day, but if we were, this weakness would be unacceptable."
"You tried to catch a giant, falling box full of naquadah," O'Neill said, sounding exasperated. "That's not weakness--it's...gravity. So you strained a muscle or something--anyone else might've been crushed."
"Only months ago," Teal'c said, "such an injury would already have been healed by my symbiote, or nearly so." To humans, he had often seemed extraordinarily strong or courageous; it pained him now to concede that some of that strength and bravery was only a knowledge that his body could withstand injuries that might seriously damage or cripple a human. Without that, and without the physical power in which he had always taken pride...
"Well," O'Neill said. "Yeah. So?"
"In battle, I could no longer guarantee that--"
"Teal'c, for cryin'..." O'Neill interrupted, then stopped and sighed. Pointing a finger toward the edge of their working area, he said, "You need to go see a medic now. Later--before we walk into battle--we're gonna have this talk again."
...x...
They returned to the village in the mountains in the evening. After their meal, while others prepared to rest before the next day's work, Daniel Jackson found him inside the part of the cave being used by SG-1 and sat in front of him. "We salvaged a few things from the intact bit of Nagada," he said, holding up a small, clay statue and pointing at a bundle he had been carrying with him. "See?"
"Indeed," Teal'c said.
"It's a little broken," Daniel Jackson said when an arm fell off into his lap. "Everything we found is. Too much wind and such, I guess. See, there used to be a gate around the village--"
"I saw the village gates many times," Teal'c reminded him.
He stilled for a moment. "Right. I knew that."
"Do you plan to take some of these with you when you return to the SGC?" Teal'c asked.
"No. They're not mine." Daniel Jackson shook his head and bundled the items up in the cloth sack again. "The memories belong to the Abydons more than they do to me." Teal'c began to point out that such familiarities might bring back more relevant memories, but Daniel Jackson interrupted. "So," he said. "How's the arm?"
"Fine," Teal'c said.
"Captain Patters said you strained your shoulder. Which I know isn't something you'd normally stop for, but we've got other people working already, and a ship, and no life-or-death situations. So Jack says to take it easy."
"Hm," Teal'c said.
"He said he talked to you. And you said some funny things about your ability to serve, and--"
"And he sent you to talk to me," Teal'c finished.
Daniel Jackson looked embarrassed but said, "Okay, yeah. You know how he is about things like this. Look, I may not remember everything, but I remember enough to know something's been bothering you. It's not just today--it was before that. Jack thinks so, too. So do Sam and Jonas."
"Your concern is unnecessary," Teal'c said, irritated.
"Actually," he said, "we're pretty sure we know what's wrong."
Teal'c scowled. "Then there is no mystery."
"Well, maybe it would help to talk about it," Daniel Jackson said. "Do you want to talk?"
Teal'c looked at him in disbelief, but Daniel Jackson seemed completely earnest. "Perhaps I should ask what has been wrong with you lately," he countered.
"What?" Daniel Jackson said blankly, appearing confused. "What are you--hold on, are you avoiding my question?"
"Indeed," Teal'c said flatly.
Daniel Jackson sighed. "I'm very confused," he said with tightly restrained frustration. "Frankly, I'm confused about a lot of things at the moment, so could you maybe explain...something to me? Anything. Pick a topic." He waited, and when Teal'c didn't answer, he tried, "Is this about the tretonin?"
"I have already explained to you the effects of tretonin," Teal'c said.
"I know the dosing has been settled," Daniel Jackson said. "And in the end, you're still as strong as you were before. You lift pretty much the same weights in the gym and run just as fast, or you would if you weren't always exhausted from not being used to your sleep cycle, and that crate that fell on you today would've fallen whether or not you'd had a symbiote."
But he would been faster if he had had a symbiote. He would barely have noticed any discomfort and would have continued working again immediately. "I was preoccupied."
"Okay, well, you can't blame that on the tretonin. Or..." Daniel Jackson frowned at him. "Or can you? This is really bothering you that much, isn't it?"
"What would you know about it?" Teal'c said quietly.
"Nothing," Daniel Jackson said. "Okay? I understand that I...can't understand. I do know your symbiote was a big part of how you saw yourself, but it doesn't mean that replacing it actually changes who you are as a person."
"You are not truly a student of psychology, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said. "I do not wish to speak further of this."
"I...wish to speak further about why you think I think I'm a student of psychology," he said, frowning. "Did I tell you that in the dream I invaded?"
Teal'c raised his chin. At times, he forgot that he was the only person to whom that dream had been real. "As I said before, it was not an invasion."
"Meaning 'yes,'" Daniel Jackson said. "Sorry if I'm repeating something I said in the dream, but you thought it was right then, didn't you? Has something changed?"
"Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said, hoping he would stop.
"Do you not call me 'chal'ti' anymore?" Daniel Jackson asked suddenly. "You used to. I remember that."
Surprised, Teal'c said, "You are becoming too old to be called that, and a tek'ma'tae does not fight alongside his chal'ti as if they were equals." He would feel uneasy calling Daniel Jackson so now, after his friend had guided him through the m'al sharan dream.
"Right," Daniel Jackson said, looking intently at the ground. He seemed about to speak, but then did not.
It did not take long for Teal'c to realize that this was the same thing that had been happening to Daniel Jackson over and over lately--the same perplexed look of concentration, the distraction from everything. "Perhaps you should worry about yourself before being concerned with me," Teal'c suggested.
Daniel Jackson jumped. "What? Oh. S-sorry. You know what, I...I'll leave you alone, then. For now. Just. Please talk to one of us when you're ready."
Teal'c sighed. "Are you all right? You have been exceedingly distracted of late."
"I'm fine." He began to stand, then hesitated and said, "What about your son?"
"Rya'c?" Teal'c said.
"Does he call you 'Tek'ma'tae?' Or does he call someone else that?"
"I...have not been able to train him myself," Teal'c said. "Bra'tac, perhaps."
Daniel Jackson nodded. "Is he with Bra'tac now?"
"Indeed," Teal'c said. "Why do you ask this?"
Instead, Daniel Jackson rubbed his eyes and said, "I don't know. Just thinking aloud, I guess." And once again, before he left, he sat back down and said, "Do you want to meditate with me tonight?"
"You know that I have discontinued the practice of kelno'reem," Teal'c said.
"Well, yeah," he said, "but people meditate when they don't have symbiotes, too. I've always found it useful, even without being able to reach true kelno'reem. Well, not always, since I get the feeling I wasn't too good at it, with the whole...staying quiet and--"
"If you wish," Teal'c allowed, "we may meditate together."
"Now?" Daniel Jackson said.
"Can you be silent now?" Teal'c said. Daniel Jackson pressed his lips together, adjusted his seat once more, and closed his eyes.
It had been weeks since Teal'c had tried this. He closed his eyes as well and took a deep breath, ignoring the sounds of the Abydonian people moving around them. Automatically, he reached out to seek harmony with a symbiote that he no longer possessed and found an emptiness where another presence had always been before. He forced himself to pull back and satisfy himself with the more shallow state that humans could achieve.
He could hear Daniel Jackson moving, unable, as always, to be still for the first several minutes until he finally calmed his mind enough. Teal'c remained unmoving and waited for the sounds of shifting to stop before he allowed himself to relax fully, listening only to the familiar sound of Daniel Jackson's steady breathing.
Some time later, he heard the breathing change rhythm.
Teal'c thought nothing of it at first--while in kelno'reem, it was easy to be aware of such slight disturbances, but he had watched over Daniel Jackson often and knew that it was difficult at the best of times for a young human who thought too much to calm his mind for so many minutes at a time.
However, instead of returning its previous rhythm, Daniel Jackson's breathing only became more unsettled. Teal'c opened his eyes to see Daniel Jackson's eyes squeezed tightly shut, his brow wrinkled, his hands clenched tightly on his knees.
"Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c said. There was no answer. "Daniel Jackson!"
With a gasp, Daniel Jackson's eyes snapped open. He looked around himself wildly, then leapt to his feet. "I--I need to..."
Teal'c rose as well, holding out an arm to restrain him. "Are you all right?"
Daniel Jackson looked at him for the first time. "Teal'c," he said. "I think Rya'c is in danger."
XXXXX
27 June 2003; Kalima, Abydos; 1800 hrs
"You think Teal'c and Daniel are done talking now?" Carter said.
Jack checked his watch. "Probably," he said. The advantage of sending Daniel to straighten out Teal'c's head was that Teal'c would get a chance to try and straighten out Daniel's in return. "Actually, we should all get back to them and turn in for the night. There's still a lot of work to be done." Looking into the next room, he called, "Jonas, curfew!"
Jonas looked up from where he had been examining one of the quern-stones someone used for grinding flour for bread each day. "Yes, sir," he said, slipping out of the workroom. "You know, these caves could actually provide some good protection--better than being in the open and protected by wooden gates, frankly, and there are plenty of places to hide or set up a defense if a Goa'uld does come back."
"Don't tell them it's better they've had to uproot and start over," Carter said.
"Right," Jonas said, looking around as if afraid someone had heard and would be offended. "No, I didn't mean... I think they'll get along all right, that's all."
"They're a tough people," Jack said, thinking of the boys who had helped him and his team fight off Ra. "They'll make it, with or without us. Maybe it'll even be better not to be associated with Earth anymore in the galactic eye--too many complications." Earth hadn't directly done anything major to Abydos except Ra, but Heru-ur, Apophis, and Anubis had all come to poke around after that. It was only a matter of time before someone decided to make an example out of Abydos.
Before any of them could leave, though, he heard the sound of footsteps pounding on rock and Daniel's voice calling, "Jack! Jack! Sam!"
Jack hurried out of the cave they were in, and Daniel barely stopped in time to avoid barreling into all of them. "What happened?" he said, taking in the wide eyes.
"O'Neill!" Teal'c called, a few steps behind.
"What's going on?" Carter said. "Teal'c?"
"I do not know," Teal'c said, looking worried. "He spoke of--"
"Rya'c," Daniel said. "Um. And Bra'tac. They're in...somewhere...a planet. A-a prison or something. With a lot of other Jaffa. Someone's making them work, and there's..." He paused, squeezing his eyes shut, and said, "A ship. It's floating. They're working naquadah, and some of them are getting sick, and there are two moons, and they're building a ship--"
"Whoa, whoa, okay," Jack interrupted, holding up his hands. Daniel stuttered to a stop. Looking at Teal'c, he asked, "What are you talking about? How do you know--"
"I was there!" Daniel said. "I was standing right there, watching them, and I couldn't do--"
"From when you were Ascended?" Jonas said.
With a jolt, Jack remembered sitting in a prison with Daniel standing there and watching but not able to do anything. Perhaps Daniel was remembering that, too, because his eyes flicked toward Jack once and then away. "I think so."
"So, some sort of forced labor camp," Jonas said. "Maybe they were caught while recruiting. Do you know where? Did you recognize the planet?"
Daniel swallowed. "You--you believe me?"
"I've believed more for less," Jack said. "Do you know where they are or not?"
"No," Daniel said. "I don't recognize anything I saw there. Except...Jack, it's Ba'al. The ones in charge wear his mark."
Jack carefully suppressed the intense desire to find Ba'al and squeeze the life out of him. Or run away and hide. Neither was a viable possibility. "Doesn't matter," he said. "We'll figure this out and get them back. When's the last time we had any contact with Rya'c and Bra'tac?"
"Less than four months ago," Teal'c said.
"And Daniel Descended over a month ago," Carter added, "so they've been there between one-and-a-half and four months. If we knew where...who might know where they've been going?"
"Rak'nor is likely to know," Teal'c said.
"Then we have to go back to the SGC," Daniel said. "Jack, we're stranded here on Abydos--we need a Stargate to do anything. We have to leave, now."
Jack nodded. "All right. Teal'c, Carter, go get the teltak ready. Jonas, Daniel, you two go back to where we're staying, gather any essential gear, and bring it to the ship. I'll tell Sha'uri and Kasuf we're going back to the SGC but SG-8 will stay and we'll be back when we're done. And we'll take one other person who can fly the ship back here after dropping us off. Move it."
...x...
Skaara volunteered to fly them to the SGC and back, for the simple reason that he actually knew how to fly a Goa'uld cargo ship from the many times he had done it as Klorel. Jack had forgotten that not every SG team member had learned to fly Goa'uld ships--particularly on support teams like SG-8--so, with Sha'uri's blessing and a promise that nothing bad would happen to Skaara this time, they lifted off.
Daniel spent the first hour on the ship perched on top of a crate full of glassy naquadah and furiously sketched everything he remembered from his brief vision. Then he sat completely still, frowning at his feet. Compared to how jumpy he'd been on Abydos, this was more familiar--not exactly calm, but rather the look he had often worn before an important mission when he had been unhappy about something.
Teal'c spent most of the time pacing in his slow, deliberate way that promised violence in the near future. Jack was tempted to tell him to stop making everyone nervous, but the image of one's son being worked to death in a forced labor camp probably trumped just about anything anyone could say.
"I'm sure he's all right," Jack tried.
Teal'c scowled.
"He's with Bra'tac," Jonas offered. "That's gotta count for a lot."
"Bra'tac would've planned for the unexpected," Carter said. "He should have enough tretonin for a couple of months, and I'm sure he'd know to stretch it out once he stumbled into trouble."
Teal'c stopped, turned around, and paced in the other direction.
"I should have said something sooner," Daniel muttered from his perch on their explosive cargo as Skaara appeared at the bulkhead and joined them.
"Ah, give it up," Jack said. He pointed out, "It's a wonder you remembered at all," which made Teal'c tense even more.
Daniel dropped his head into his hands. "I'm still missing something else," he said. "Something about an incoming wormhole to base."
"To base?" Carter repeated, bending to pick up Daniel's sketches. "Have we been to that planet?"
"Or someone on that planet tried to get to us," Jonas said.
"Bra'tac," Teal'c said.
"But you have an iris," Skaara pointed out.
"Well, maybe he tried to radio a message since he didn't have a GDO?" Jonas suggested.
Carter shook her head. "We definitely would've noticed if a message had gotten through. And if he didn't manage to send the message before he was cut off, there's not a lot of information we can get from records of an incoming wormhole."
"I just stood there," Daniel said in a low voice, almost to himself, still scowling at his hands.
"If you could've done something while you were all glowy," Jack said, "you would've. Now everyone calm down--that includes you, Teal'c."
"My son--" Teal'c started.
"I get it!" Jack snapped. "Sit down."
Teal'c gave him a long look and finally sat stiffly.
"When we get back," Jack said, "we'll give Skaara a Tollan long-range communicator so we can call Abydos and get a ride back afterward. Teal'c will find Rak'nor, and Carter and Daniel can start looking through wormhole records while Jonas and I...try to make ourselves useful. There's nothing we can do now. Any questions?" he added, meaning that the discussion was over.
"No, sir," Carter answered for all of them, meaning that the message was taken.
"Good." Jack turned to Skaara and firmly changed the subject. "So. How's the fiancée?"
Finally, Daniel raised his head and turned to his brother. Skaara was already looking back and gave him a regretful, knowing smile before he answered. Jack let Skaara chatter about his wife-to-be and watched out of the corner of his eye as Daniel looked away.
Continued in part c...